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....a Good Morning Anyway ! :)


Katherine

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You know I wrote a letter to my parents about my having left the psychotherapy training course I was on????

And that I was in a desperate worried panic about how I imagined their responses..imagined rejection and abandonment...

They got it this morning and my mum left me a lovely message on my voice mail about how it wasn't a surprise to her and she feels its better for me right now to have left it, and how my dad wanted to give me a hug "right NOW"....and they understand....and they try to understand but that only I can really understand.

:D:D:D

I did actually speak to them because I was just texting them back when my mum rang (to leave a message but I was 'switched on'-I usually have my mobile switched off) to say how she hoped she hadn't said the wrong thing and for me not to take it the wrong way what she'd said....

well...I assured her that I was very touched by the message and that it meant a lot to me. I won't let her take that away from me, I didn't let her take it away from me. I am firm enough in my own inner security (wow!).

I spoke to dad too, he said himself that he'd like to give me a hug right then, and I could tell how heartfelt it was. I assured him that I could feel the hug anyway...because I could.

I am beginning to see my exaggerated overreactive BPD thinking, how its 'twisted' BUT ^_^ I recognise how my imagined expectations were not wrong or unexpected or way out, based in my past emotional experience and struggles.

ok, so 'just' therapy to get through today now :mellow::o-_-

....I mean, I FEEL its been repaired from the end of Wednesday's session, but seeing my t again might open the gates of painful BPD hell up again....but I DO have something within me to hold onto, and that's :wub: amazing to me....

:wub:

karie

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that's brill! good for you and well done! sooooooooooo pleased it worked out well for you. :D

just shows us all how much we sometimes fear "Fear" itself, and often the actual event isn't nearly as bad as our wonderfully colourful imaginations predict.

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thanks Janey and Em....

and my imagination sure is technicoloured....rainbow is not in it...which of course has its positive points--like in creative visualisation/Jungian active imagination, writing and drawing....but when it comes to relationships.....still, I'm learning and I'm well happy that I'm learning!!!!

:) :) :)

karie

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Hi Karie,

I am so pleased everything went well for you. Your parents sound quite supportive to me, but, it must be a great relief to you that they accept you know what you are doing and are maintaining control of your own life. In some ways that is something I have never done, I mean, taken control although that is only with my home life, work is different - well, I am a bit stronger.

I hope you feel really proud of yourself, I have never been able to take the decision to give up something when it is not right, I just stay stuck, so, many many congratulations.

Relating to my leaving home topic:

You have inspired me today, I have my own house next door to my parents, but, it remains our party house as I struggle to stay there by myself, but, tonight I will give it ago. I shall picture our wild imaginations and banish the demons when they come to frighten me, so, thanks Karie for your strength and inspiration.

Do take care and have fun,

JT.

P.s. it is better to be learning than be standing still - you may need to remind me that I said this one day!

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thanks Bets.... I need to write them out and list them on my Good Stuff Board!!!

JT....I'm pleased to have inspired you.....

.....sending a ****very good**** part of my imagination to help you banish those demons.....let it help stamp on them and kick them out the door... Take care...

karie

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Thanks Karie, but, I must own up, I have locked my house up for the night. It was far too quiet and empty and I can't get online so I decided to return back to my folks and have a look around here. I think I shall have another go tomorrow night, so, if you find you are missing some imagination, you know who is borrowing it.

Many thanks for you support, Jane

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Ecellent kari - I am really pleased it went well.......

(((((((((((kari)))))))))))) and (((((((((((((lora))))))))))))

Ginny :)

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hey Jane, don't pressure and push yourself and give yourself added stress....

and, my imagination is 100% self replenishable, so I won't ever be missing any...there's plenty to go around.....

(its like the magic porridge pot in the story:) )

Take care,

k.

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