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Straw Poll - Brothers And Sisters


hummm_mabbe

Which are you?  

187 members have voted

  1. 1. Are you oldest, middle or youngest?



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Interesting to see how the results are going so far.

I must admit, I am youngest, and because of this always felt bottom of the pile - that is, "shit rolls downhill". I have very strong issues around being controlled or trapped in emotional situations I have no influence over, which kind of describes my experiecne of my family :) I did have a theory that in controlling or dysfunctional families, it would be the youngest who was more likely to be controlled / picked on by the family as a whole, for example, dad picks on mum, mum picks on oldest, oldest picks on youngest. When I say picked on, I suppose I am talking about criticality and the suppression of emotions like anger.

I have heard of middle child syndrome, and did read somewhere that in depression its more likely to be the older child who becomes depressed. I am now wondering how many of those 'youngests' have a PD dx? You know, is there a link between being youngest and having a PD?

I suppose this poll isnt totally scientific as I havent separated for dx :( Ah well ill never get me PhD at this rate lol

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There are some huge families here!!

I am the middle of 3. The eldest was the golden child (beautiful and clever), then there was me, then my wee brother (golden boy, son and heir, could do no wrong-very very clever lad)

I was the scapegoat. Stood up for myself, stubborn, spoke out of turn, not as smart as the others, not as pretty...etc.

ruthie

x

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Its also worth noting that as a 'middle' you would have spent at least SOME time as a 'youngest'.

For those who are middles, how many years did you spend as youngest before the new ones came along?

Ross

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There are some huge families here!!

I am the middle of 3. The eldest was the golden child (beautiful and clever), then there was me, then my wee brother (golden boy, son and heir, could do no wrong-very very clever lad)

I was the scapegoat. Stood up for myself, stubborn, spoke out of turn, not as smart as the others, not as pretty...etc.

ruthie

x

:hug2:

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Its also worth noting that as a 'middle' you would have spent at least SOME time as a 'youngest'.

For those who are middles, how many years did you spend as youngest before the new ones came along?

Ross

18 months for me

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Its also worth noting that as a 'middle' you would have spent at least SOME time as a 'youngest'.

For those who are middles, how many years did you spend as youngest before the new ones came along?

Ross

18 months for me

Hi lavender

Ta for that :) If you dont mind me asking, what was your relationship with the older sibling like? You dont have to answer if you dont wanna of course ....

Ross

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My older brother we got on great,he alaways looked out for me, Sorry to say though he died in 2001 at the age of 39.

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Ross, in answer to your question I was the youngest for 5 years before little brocame along and put me to middle. However, my older bro had a nervous twitch and possible tourettes (we now know is just OCD but at time he was dx tourettes and saw a shrink). My little brother has a very serious heart complaint and chronic asthma/allergies and nearly died on several occasions at home. Terrifying for us all. However, I was the well one so therefore not so important or needing of attention.

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Ah ok ta Roses, sounds pretty stressie. Sounds like you spent the most part of your early childhood as being the youngest, pretty long stretch of time. Its just me little theory that being the youngest, over certain periods of development, might lead in dysfunctional families to feeling more powerless - and hence more prone to PD's and depression / anxiety.

I know I have huge issues round being controlled and subjugated or feeling trapped, which is how I always felt.

Of course you can feel depressed about different things - not only feeling powerless. People might feel depressed over not feeling loveable and stuff, but still feel they have control over their lives. Im just wondering how much being the youngest in a sufficiently dysfunctional family - even if its only for a short time - can impact specifically on the sense of not having control over your life.

Of course, anyone who is subjugated by another and unable to stop it can develop those same feelings - I just wondered if it was a more likely feeling in those that have at some point been the youngest.

Ross

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My older brother we got on great,he alaways looked out for me, Sorry to say though he died in 2001 at the age of 39.

Sorry to hear that lavender :(

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Well I have had '2 lives' - in my biological family i was the middle one and in my adoptive family i was the eldest - i hated being the eldest when i was adopted cos it seemed like i got the blame for everything, i hated the responsibilty of being the eldest probably cos i knew i was really the middle child !!

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hi i am an only child to data and pink stars- and adopted also.

lavandar, im very sorry to hear you lost a brother you were so close to. sad.gif

good poll, Ross.

a.m

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I'm the youngest! Of three. My big brother oldest of us all, has a very severe developmental disorder (prob. autism), so I might end up the middle kid.

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oh no oh no oh no!! I don't know what to vote!!

Am eldest in the household...but there is an older half-sister who have never met apart from fleeting glance as she stormed out of father's house just as i was arriving a few years back. younger half-brother who i've lived with all his life, and another half-brother on my dad's side, who i have only met a few times, and that was 2-4 years ago.

Confusedddd.

:mellow: :huh:

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I guess for the sake of this poll, it would be where in the order of siblings you have spent significant portions of your childhood with.

Crippie de la little, middle or big? :)

Ross

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