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lauraw2693

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This isn't very much but I wanted to share because I'm kinda proud of myself with how bad I've been feeling that I've managed to do this. I spent all of yesterday trying to psych myself up enough just to go for a little walk but hate the heat and hate how busy it is right now (I live right by a river so popular spot when it's sunny). I wasn't doing so well yesterday, I blanked out for a couple of hours again which completely threw me for the rest of the day <_< But I made it out today, just for a little half hour walk but it's better than nothing, and in short sleeves as well, my arms are healed but I can't stand people looking at my scars :mellow: Just too hot to cover up. Managed the washing up finally, eaten properly, replied to therapist's email, written half of a goodbye letter for a different therapist, just going to have a shower now then try finish that then maybe get on with some of this essay I need to get finished by next week :rolleyes: Just thought I'd share something semi-positive for a change.. Still feeling sick a lot but think the meds withdrawals are starting to wear off and I'm feeling no better or worse off them than I was on them.. Oo and 2 weeks free from caffeine and nearly 4 free from alcohol :D

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I keep coming back to this and trying to say something, but my words keep coming out wrong, but i wanna say something.

I think we all know how hard it is to do anything at all when we are struggling - even getting our arses out of bed can literally take an entire day of screaming at ourselves before we actually find the motivation to do so. The fact that you got up, got out, washed up, sorted emails, is absolutely incredible hun. There's nothing more to say, really, i'm just incredibly proud of you, you're doing so well.

xxxxxxx

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Aww thank you lovely that's so sweet of you ^_^ I finished my therapist's letter, think it sounds stupid but nevermind I was honest. I'll ask someone to check it before I send it, check it's tactful enough :P Think I'm starting to wind down now, I always seem rediculously tired after blanking out and was last night then had a nightmare so didn't get much sleep and it's starting to kick in I think :rolleyes: hugs xxxxxx

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You've done really well. leaving the house for half an hour can be a really big thing, especialy when its extra crowded and hot. It's not surprising your tired after everything youve done, i would be tired too after all that! I hope the side effects go completely soon xx

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Well done Shadow. It is a fantastic achievement, and certainly not ''this isn't very much''.

I know how hard it is to accept praise from others for our achievements, but to praise ourselves is sometimes even harder For you to recognise these positive steps, and then feel proud of yourself is a big step indeed.

After you've lost time you're bound to feel disorientated for a while. Just be gentle with yourself. xx

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Thank you :) Not sure how I'm feeling today, not very well physically again :rolleyes: Still determined to get some of my essay done and go for another little walk though.. You're right Kalico, that was actually me being positive yesterday, not feeling so proud of myself again today <_< xxx

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Hey nah not really I'm back to feeling crap <_< Done half my dissertation now though thanks, need to finish by Sunday though :mellow: xxx

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