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Annoyed At Notice Board


miss.smiff

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I was reading the notice board and was really annoyed when i read one of the topics in there...

"This certainly had an impact upon the way i feel about this community And has also impacted upon my motivation to continue to ensure the place thrives"

Now it's probably not my place to say but i was a bit hurt by what was said. I know it wasn't aimed at me. And probably was not ment to offend anybody . But i do feel that what if said was kind of mean and almost threatening in a way?

I think it was really unfair to put what he did. I've minded my own business and come across a post which is really not very nice. Yes okay he may be a little upset about responses he has got but i don't see why he had to say something like that.

i am also part of this community and i have never done anything to desurve that being said.

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I can kind of see both sides of the argument on this one. I really appeciate what Josh puts into the board and why he might have felt upset, but at the same time I am also liking having the old PM system and status updates back.

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I think Joshua is entitled to his opinion, especially given that its his site. He is allowed to say how he feels.

Having said that, his feelings were out of kilter with those of most people here... the vast majority of people didn't want to lose the status updates. So if he makes unpopular changes then perhaps he has to expect lots of negative reaction.

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I feel the same in a way too and maybe some others do too,I have not even been around much to know what was going on,I did read last night what was said,How come members can't post on updates too?Why do we have to pay?Also i asked about 4 days ago can i be a peer support but no reply :( I feel unimportant.Not having ago just feel i have to say this.

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Also what about the newish members here? I never even had a status to begin with- so i really don't care or mind about it. but They're gunna come here thinking it's a welcoming place to be and read that by the guy who created the site- what are they going to think of this place? It gives the impression that nobody really cares...

Yes it's Malawi that he's upset and i understand that- i just think that little bit if said was not Called for or appropriate

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@Data i can't read some of what you wrote because your status is covering your writting lol.

catseyes, this is what DAta wrote: think Joshua is entitled to his opinion, especially given that its his site. He is allowed to say how he feels.

hope this helps x

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Thank you manja :)

Yeah Data it is his site but without the members there would be no site,Anyway I can see why Josh would be annoyed,miss smiff thanks for raising this.

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* this is a very sensitive topic for the entire community working through the hurt feelings is painful and difficult still.

I say this in the nicest way, I just want to make you aware, I know you weren't a member at the time, but it left too much damage to too many people, having been here for 4 years now and seeing alot in that time, I have sent a PM asking that this topic be monitored. I would hate to see anyone get banned over it (because it does happen) Or people in crisis being overlooked in the heat. I hope you can understand my concern for the forum as a whole.

So many members are are really really happy to have the site restored and want to move past the hurt from then and focus on the progress of recovery.

Sah

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That's good and all. I just want a place where people care- and seeing what was posted makes me think does the man who created the site not care? Because that's what he appears to be saying

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Hi guys,

catseyes;where did you send yor request to become a peersupporter?? We havent seen it??

As for Josh's comments in his post on the notice board I can only speak for myself. Ive been working here for years as a volunteer. Its very disheartening the way staff gets treated A LOT. Ive been called names,been personally attacked etc When we started the supoort page we got a load of shit from members. Sure if you dont like it thats fine but thats not what went on. We were accused of not caring,we where called names,there where long threads in which Josh and I where being slagged off very severely. That is not fair in my eyes and that I think is where Josh's remark comes from.

So its not that I am offended people didnt like it,its that people(not all but quite a few)got very very nasty.

Im sure Josh does not mean to threaten to stop.All he is saying is he had some doubts about continueing after that. He is only human.

When youre trying to help people and you get 90% nastyness thrown at you,thats not very motivating.

Lily

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Hi guys,

catseyes;where did you send yor request to become a peersupporter?? We havent seen it??

As for Josh's comments in his post on the notice board I can only speak for myself. Ive been working here for years as a volunteer. Its very disheartening the way staff gets treated A LOT. Ive been called names,been personally attacked etc When we started the supoort page we got a load of shit from members. Sure if you dont like it thats fine but thats not what went on. We were accused of not caring,we where called names,there where long threads in which Josh and I where being slagged off very severely. That is not fair in my eyes and that I think is where Josh's remark comes from.

So its not that I am offended people didnt like it,its that people(not all but quite a few)got very very nasty.

Im sure Josh does not mean to threaten to stop.All he is saying is he had some doubts about continueing after that. He is only human.

When youre trying to help people and you get 90% nastyness thrown at you,thats not very motivating.

Lily

I tried to message you but the PM system wouldn't let me so i left a comment on your profile :)

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I'm sorry that you have been treated in this way. And it's a real shame that people aren't always as nice as they should be.

I'm coming from a perspective where i did not know any of this had gone on. I was just offended because what he said sounded like he was saying it was everybodys fault- and i didn't think it was very fair to say something like that. To me it sounded spiteful

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I hear you. I understand,Im sure though it was only aimed at those that where actually nasty.

I know Josh well,the entire staff,me and Josh are doing this work for one reason only;because we care about those that need help.

Lily

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If I'm honest i just want him to not say something like that again. (The bit i quoted- the rest is fine) he probably didn't mean to offend anyone, but he did. I just want him to know that he has offended me and probably loads of other members who just mind their own.

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Miss Smiff Im sure Josh will read this some time today and make note of your oipinion.

Cats yes you can,have you tried PMing me via the supportpage? You should be able to do that,then we can discuss things further.

Lily

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Yes im sorry that for newbies they wouldnt know what i was going on about, but clearly this was for existing members.

The post i wrote in notice board was an expression of where im at.. it was not aimed at any individual. There was no intention for my post to come across as a threat etc. Should i be thinking something i would just say it.

As Lilly has said, we have all been through occasions where we are abused, insulted, and mistreated as members of a volunteer team here but i believe it fair to say i take on the brunt of this and have done for quite a number of years. I would be inhuman should this not have an affect on my levels of motivation etc.

Someone has mentioned that one should expect some negative reactions with unpopular changes. I agree to a point but not to be abused and treated the way I and others on my team have.

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Someone has mentioned that one should expect some negative reactions with unpopular changes. I agree to a point but not to be abused and treated the way I and others on my team have.

Yes there is no excuse for name calling and personal insults. I can understand how it must hurt when you are trying to help people and you get abuse back as the reward.

There is a big difference between expressing your opinion respectfully and doing it disrespectfully.

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I normally stay out of things like this and can't say too much because not been on here too long but here I am typing anyway!!

I did read the post on the notice board and think it was a bit harsh and felt it was directed at everyone (even though I realise it wasn't) but then realise that if I felt personally offended by one comment, I should imagine how I would feel if I was overwhelmed with complaints, some very extreme, when I was just trying to do my best to help people.

This is a place where everyone tries to help each other but it does take someone to keep it going overall and all the time, commitment and criticism that involves. If I was trying to help and improve things but inevitably made mistakes or had difficulties along the way and was under such heavy personal criticism then I would have a bit of a grumble too.

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Hi, I would like to add...I am a new member here also, I did read that post & found it a bit heavy, but then I figured it was concerning people & incidents 'before my time' so I wasn't bothered.

I am very glad that Josh & volunteers started this site, that they have kept it going even through some apparent difficulties...THANK YOU!!!

Am also very glad that I have found it, so far I am finding it very helpful, 'a good place to be', & I find most of the members are supportive & friendly.

AGAIN- THANK YOU :bigarmhug[1]:

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I held my tongue for as long as I could. I really did which helped me lose plenty of f-words but there is only so much taking deep breaths can do for.

Firstly I wish to start this message off by saying I am dissapointed by the responses i received in relation to the new support system.

The way you went about this white elephant warranted negative responses. It wasn't as if you legitimately promoted this new system, rather you forced users of an existing community onto this new system by taking their PMs and status updates.

This act was very distressing for a lot of members of this community, forcing several to quit.

I went to great personal and financial expense to intergrate this system with all the new functions it brings to the community

This would explain why you got offended and took the criticisms personally. However, practically everybody on this planet will invest a great deal of time, energy, money and passion into a wide variety of projects throughout their lives(relationships, exercise regimens, career strategies, family planning to name a very small few). Many of these projects will fail but the mature thing to do is take it on the chin, look at why they went wrong and figure out if the project is worth the necessary hassle in the future. The immature thing to do is get upset at innocent others when your project encroaches on their lives.

I feel that the response was largely negative and unsupportive.

Negative feedback is just as legitimate as constructive criticism. I'm going to use a rudimentary analogy here. Say for example somebody was slapping me in the face. If I was to advise them to perhaps allign their fingers and raise the trajectory a little so that they can achieve a better angle, that would be constructive criticism. If I was to say "Whoa, wtf? That's very annoying, stop doing that." then that would be negative feedback. In most circumstances, if I had an option of the two, I would plumb for the latter.

I also believe the responses were premature and did not give the changes the time they needed.

Invalid. Your actions of changing the main forum whilst the new place was infested with glitches was premature. One should've made sure the changes were effective and already an improvement on the status quo instead of making it up as it went along.

This has certainly had an impact upon the way i feel about this community and has also impacted upon my motivation to continue to ensure the place thrives.

Why tell us this? What business is this of ours? Is this to elicet a sense of guilt and or sympathy from us so that we as a collective will change our attitudes towards you? If not, then it's about your personal feelings which should be discussed amongst your friends (or put in a 'bad day' thread) and not made as a public announcement to the entire forum.

I have brought back the status updates for the forums.

About time.

ctd...

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