berenger Posted July 9, 2013 Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 I've been psoting a lot recently about how i was going to a place to help me cut down my drinking - alcohol counselling. I did have a great worker but i got a crush on her and i was stopped seeing her and then other stuff happened like i had a couple of crisis and was treated really badly - banned from the drop in and told it was because i was vulnerable when in reality they were implying i can't be trusted around people perhaps because i'll get a crush on them or was a threat. I also got a really rude and condescending worker who made me feel really bad. I understand why i couldn't see my worker again, for professional reasons (though at first it was agreed we'd go on working together as she was leaving soon). I did e mail her on facebook whih is a wrong thing i did and a black mark against me. I would like to see her for 5 minutes though to say thanks as she was really good as a professional and to get some closure. Its the being banned from a drop in and the insulting way i was treated by a couple of staff members. I am thinking of complaining and rang today and they just said they'd send a form. I was hoping to speak to a manager really. They are probably fed up of me now as its been an intense few weeks. Should i complain ? Do i complain to the manager at the centre ?. Do i find out who funds them ?. Has anyone complained before and how did it turn out ? Can anyone irl help me ? I just feel a lot of anger towards them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Threemoons Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 I'm sorry I can't help you with this, Berenger. Still replying to up your thread so people see it. Hugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artemis84 Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 This is a difficult one berenger. I honestly don't know what to advise you. I guess it comes down to whether you would feel worse if you did complain and got an unsatisfactory outcome (whatever that may mean for you) or whether you do nothing at all. I can really feel your unhappiness and the sense that you have been treated unjustly and it is natural for you to want to seek some recompense for this. I'm just a bit concerned that you might end up feeling worse if things get even more tense and complicated. The only vaguely similar experience I have had is when I complained to the Samaritans about how one of their volunteers spoke to me at a time of crisis. They dealt with this very professionally in the end and it did help validate my feelings. I think go with your heart, if you think there is more to be gained than lost then by all means complain. It might be the case that all complaints have to be started with the form they are sending - most places have a strict complaints procedure nowadays. Sorry I can't be of more use. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Another option is to leave it for 6 months, and then contact them again to discuss the situation. They may be prepared to review your ban. Just an idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berenger Posted July 10, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 I'm a bit confused by this issue. I got the complaints form today and one option on there before making a formal complaint is to contact a higher authority in a different place who may supervise them. I decided this was one step less than making a formal complaint and sent an e mail. Don't know if i did right thing but i also got some advice from someone i know who knows the charity inside out and they said i should contact this person before a formal complaint. The worker i really liked leaves at the end of the week and its really bugging me. I haven't had closure and can't bear the thought she hates me. Feel sad but angry too. trying to distract tonight but next 2 days will be hard. I know what you mean artemis but i just don't seem to be able to do nothing. Fearful of further hurt though too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artemis84 Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Yeah, I can understand that. I think you might have to resign yourself to the fact that you are unlikely to get the closure you ideally want with/ on behalf of that specific worker though. Yes it is a totally shit situation and you must be hurting so much and feel full with desperation but you might have to slowly accept that in this case, things went wrong and may never be rectified how you'd like. Sorry, I don't mean that to sound patronising or harsh. I just don't want you to be clutching at straws only to be let down later. As far as emailing the person today, I think that was a sensible move. Hope it brings some discussion and happy solutions to you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berenger Posted July 10, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Hi artemis, A part of me is resistant to what you say and wants and hopes for resolution over next couple of days. I think i made mistakes and am kicking myself and regretful, thats whats hard. it also feels unfair because the implication is i am a threat to her, which is ridiculous. I think deep down i know i won't get what i want, that you are right. I am very sensitive to this though. i attend a mh centre where i can get help and i use support lines in evenings when distressed, aswell as here of course. I just feel my worker was a special person, i got too close and got burnt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.