jaynpoppy Posted July 15, 2013 Report Share Posted July 15, 2013 I was just thinking that before I had ocd I used to think what I wanted and felt "normal" as such, I wasn't scared of my own thoughts and the fears that came with them, like being terrified that I`ll act on them an stuff so why am I so scared now? where has that security gone, that trust in myself, that I can think an feel what I want with out acting on it?? coz my ocd came on after I took some magic mushrooms when I was 16 years old, I was completely traumatised by the experience. ive just realised that when I get an obsession I feel out of control an don't trust myself coz the ocd reminds me of how much I felt out of control that night when I took the mushrooms, I guess for me its like some form of flashback a reminder of how out of control I felt (ptsd) and that really I need to get to grips with learning that im ok an that im just refeeling how I felt that night, but its not the same im not helpless, its just an unreal amount of anxiety. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flower1111 Posted May 31, 2015 Report Share Posted May 31, 2015 Ive been thinking about when i was younger before i had OCD and i was Happy and did not worry about what number i was treading on or how many times i turned a light on or off!!. Its quite sad,,its almost like with responsibility came trauma and not coping on my own in a way. BUT,,i do cope with certain things quite well on my own as im a fighter i know that!. I still dont even know what started it!!. My mum was severely Mentally ill and i saw a lot at a young age that a child should not see so im wondering if that was it!!. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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