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The Praise Room


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  • Kitsune

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Hey guys, Everybody needs a little praise sometimes, a well done, a keep going, someone noticing that they've done something. Many of us either didn't get praise/validation or g

Ok. This is my fifth month in AA. Totally dry . I had my assessment for bpd and survived it with minimal damage.

Proud of myself for being willing to put myself to bed when I was in crisis and take a PRN despite not wanting the side effects. I have been able to slow myself down and do a bit of self care.

  • 2 weeks later...

Today was a good day.

A friend of mine has been incredibly unwell for arounds three or four years, basically house bound because of his anxieities and panics.

I don't live near him, but today went along to a mental health workshop with him in his area.

They had a juggling and plate spinning class at a centre.

He was actually chatting away quite merrily once again, which I actually was unbelievably concerned for his sake that he would never ever do again, so I was so chuffed for him that he took such a massive risk for him, which I feel will reap fantastic benefits once again for him in the long term.

It was greatly important for me to see him back on the recovery road as he was a total rock for myself a few years ago when my life was so incredibly tough.

Nice for me too.

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  • 1 month later...

Maybe everyone will think this is a bad thing but the result of it was good.

I was in some public toilets at a station and I was trying to put the wrong money in because I'd assumed it was the same price as the public toilets at a different station. The attendant came up and shouted "GO THROUGH! GO THROUGH! GO THROUGH!" and I said quite quietly and gently "no need to shout."

I was really appalled I'd said that and was scared of leaving the toilets and when I did I had trouble getting through the barrier because again it was different. The attendant came up and quietly said "There's a button down there, you have to press it." I said thank you, she said you're welcome and we smiled at each other.

I hope I didn't scare her or anything. I honestly did speak quietly. But I was really glad to have the chance to show her that I wasn't a completely rude person all the time and it made me feel so happy to hear someone speaking nicely to me and not shouting.

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  • 1 month later...

I came home from work, got changed and went straight back out for a run. Did 4km - not far by any means but the furthest I have done in a long time. (In fact I have only run once in the past couple of months at all!) Feel like I have done quite well today :)

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  • 2 weeks later...

I love this thread and hope we can kick it up again!

And Yay! for sobriety and making changes and doing difficult things.

I am proud of myself for not throwing a tantrum each night when my partner sleeps in the other room. Even though it's difficult, I'm using my skills and my resources and behaving like a grown ass woman rather than crying and sobbing and begging him to give me the affection I hunger for.

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  • 3 weeks later...

realised today that i procrastinate too much, and need to stop it.

watched some old episodes of star trek, that i thought were crap before, but now enjoy.

realised that people can read my thoughts, and they use this against me, and it's time for find out what rays i put out, since nobody else has that.

started my online business, and going into consulting. i am writing some booklets, which i intend to sell on various topics.

had a nice nap in the afternoon.

made some porridge.

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i got a job interview today.

and made some good blog posts for my business.

and realised that what i think of me is most important. i don't care if people don't care for me, or "don't think i'm worthwhile" and because of this wish to psychically read me...i'd bet in daily life, i outdo them on many fronts, so meh...i'm not bothered. and it's perfectly normal not to care if others don't care for me and wish to "read my soul/thoughts" to undermine me/hurt me. i doubt any psychologist would say different..... part of life is knowing friends, allies, enemies, and foes, so i'm all good...:D

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  • 2 months later...

Wow, everyone here has been fighting so hard for each small bit of their life that it makes me feel proud of mankind that even through mental health troubles and the such people can go and achieve something. It's so great:)

As for me, I got A+ for my term paper at university this week. ;)

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  • 3 weeks later...

Yesterday I completed the Pretty Muddy (a 5k mud and obstacle run for cancer research) with my friends/ the cast of the play we are doing at the weekend. I lost the sole off my shoe halfway round and there were some tears from my friend as she remembered her grandma who passed away from cancer this year but we all made it and had a lot of fun and raised over £200 for cancer research.

I'm aching today but bf says he's proud of me for cleaning the bathroom regardless, especially as i worry about not being domesticated enough.

 

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Yesterday I vacuumed out my car and I identified the source of the smell - it is my hiking boots!  I've cleaned them and they are drying outside at the moment.

Today I lead a group of 18 people on a 5.5 mile walk through the beautiful Ironbridge Gorge area.  We had to walk through a field of tall crops, passed two horses on a narrow path, and walked next to the River Severn. Most of us stopped off at a charity-run restaurant where one of the members bought me a cup of tea, it was so refreshing.

Yesterday work was challenging and I coped with it well; I tried my best to focus despite my anxiety and was productive and I also interacted well with 3 directors who called me into a meeting.

 

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Well done Data : )

Yesterday and today were the shows which the drama group I, boyfriend and another friend set up were performing. We completed the Pretty Muddy together as a team the week before and went over our target of £200, we were donated a whopping £430 from a group who came to one of our shows which is going to Cancer Research and £1.50 from each ticket sale is going to Cancer Research, plus one of the cast's workplaces want to also donated about £500 maybe so we will have raised loads of money for a good cause.

It's been tiring and stressful and lovely having everyone over to rehearse and to perform as a group in a professional setting (the theatre me and bf work at so it was a real risk if it fell flat!) and i feel a real mix of relief and sadness now it's all over, a sense of 'what now?'.

I'm proud of us all, we did good.

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Well done Kitsune.  The ladies in my office did the Cheshire Pretty Muddy. 

Last night I managed to have no alcohol which was good as I dropped my wife off in my car at 8am this morning!

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  • 7 months later...

I am getting better and quicker at housework. I think I'm probably still slow by most people's standards but I hope I'll be doing it at a normal speed eventually. Even if I don't, it's now up to the sort of speed where housework isn't taking over my life anymore. Sometimes it almost seems like the housework does itself because I do it automatically instead of having to remember. I do forget sometimes but I tell myself that's allowed because it's still quite new to me. My mum never let me do anything and she didn't like me watching her do it either so I'm a lot more ignorant and inexperienced than most people but I'm still doing housework. My OT says she'll probably only come 1 more time because she's satisfied with how the flat looks - and it is much nicer than any other council flat I've visited. I really like cooking and I quite like sweeping and I really like cleaning the sink for some reason. I enjoy planning my meals and I've actually cooked every night since I've been here - not even 1 takeaway or cold dinner! I hate cleaning the bathroom but I'm just glad there are some things I do like! I thought I was going to hate all of it except the cooking.

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  • 5 years later...

As most bpd sufferers will know validation is a massive thing which many of us have probably missed out on during childhood and best part of our lives and personally I felt and still feel to be honest like I’m big headed when I think/feel something good about self or what Iv achieved but I’m learning to slowing. Fortunately I now have a few people in my life that encourages me to express and validate my achievements.

First massive achievement is I’m getting out of bed each morning that’s a big deal for anyone let alone someone in a mental health crisis. A saying once said to me (which I have now owed lol) It never rains everyday! So no matter what your feel in that ‘crisis’ it will pass. I have to point out that when people used to tell me that I didn’t believe it or I guess I didn’t understand it. I thought how will these emotions/ thoughts every change. ‘Try living this life for a day’ I would reply. But now I see it’s not about long term think short term like really short term. Crisis point and ride with it , scream , blare your music out just give it 5 mins and try to suppress the impulsive actions. I know it doesn’t always  work  every time Iv had 12 years of inpatient hospital treatment , community care and only within the last couple of years I have managed to gain control over my confusing emotions. But it feels good. I’m not going to lie I still have the intense emotions I have just found my way of coping with them better. Which is headphone blasting rock music as I sit in my garden day or night whatever the weather but it works.  You just have to find your own ‘way’ 

I still get no recognition from my family that I have achieved not being admitted to hospital for 3 years or done something impulsive. But I now recognise this achievement ,doesn’t matter what other think ( but I know it does in many of our cases mine including) but they won’t change there believes or behaviours but I can and I can make my life better. MY life no living my life with values imposed on me but my life where I can wear what I like , eat what I like. it’s exciting like a child learning these things for the first time in my life even though im in my 30’s now.

So just what to say to everyone out there ‘It never rains everyday’ 

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