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I Talk To Inanimate Objects. Please Help.


pommegranate1

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Hello everyone. This is my first post and I really hope that someone out there can help me. I'm 24 years old and from every since I knew myself, I talk to my pillow. I have given it a gender. It is a boy. I talk to "him" and consider him my child sometimes. This is no joke. I also always speak for him as a response to my questions.

I have a boyfriend and I am in a stable relationship but I want to stop doing this because my boyfriend thinks that it is unhealthy for me. He thinks that at 24, I should have outgrown this I suffer from anxiety, I second guess myself and I have a hard time accepting decisions I make.

I have been to a psychiatrist before but not for this problem. I use to suffer badly from terrible memories of an ex and it began to affect me a lot. My psychiatrist suggested thought stopping exercises which did help for some time but the problem never really did go away.

Can someone help by offering some advice as to how I should approach this. I want to start with one problem at a time. I searched the web but came up empty handed for anyone who talks to inanimate objects. Please help me.

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(((pommegranate1))) Hello and :welcomeani: .xxx........This is a really lovely forum and I really hope you will find some answers that you will find helpful.............xxx I was just wondering whether you are having any therapy at the moment or whether you are still under your psychiatrist.............? Not necessarily because there is anything majorly wrong here, but just because if you are in therapy or with your psych still, there can be no harm done, in bringing up what you have here............personally, it sounds like some sort of coping mechanism for you, its something you do........I talk to myself sometimes, I talk to the wall sometimes, I talk to the air,I cuddle up to a pillow imagining it my be my long lost brother sometimes, and I have thoughts which I sometimes utter..............., I buy objects and things, and cups of tea, in two's..........sometimes..........I used to worry about it dreadfully. but it is part of who I am, it isn't doing anyone any harm, and I would really hope that you will have full support from your boyfriend that if it is something that you do, that is very much part of you, that he won't try to change this in you..........because it is part of you..........I suppose it is more about you maybe, and him, getting some understanding of where and why this is something that you do, that obviously brings you comfort..........and a therapist and a psych talkings, would be a good place to start do you think? and here too of course, and I hope more peeps will come back to post.............but please don't fret..........we all deal with our lives and who we are and what has happened to us in our lives, in own unique ways..........Also, I can think of a lot of other people who talk to their pillows, and give them a name too..............so I know you are definitely not alone..............and if it is a big part of you, I hope there is not too much pressure from yourself or B/F.........to stop..........you do it for a reason..........and I hope you can be gently guided and assisted by those that can help you, to maybe just understand why it is important and comforting for you...........You are not alone OK?.........Anyways, Hi and welcome again, and apologies for my waffling............Pickles.xxx

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tbh i dont think theres anything wrong in it. it is obviously a coping mechanism for you.

and its not up to your bf to tell u to stop. just make sure u do this alone and not in his company but yes if it is interfering in your everyday life or taking over then maybe talk to a councellor or therapist who can help you with this

goos luck....oh and welcome xx

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hi pommegranate1,

welcome to the forum :)

i hear your distress (and that of your boyfriend) xxx

please be careful in throwing your pillow away too soon. it sounds like it might be a way for you to tap into your inner wisdom and guidance... and that is a very precious thing we must hang on to. or maybe it is a good friend... or a child... that is very precious too. or maybe it is your playful nature... which is so valuable. whatever your pillow is, it matters to you, and because of that, it is important. very important.

maybe your pillow can help your boyfriend to gently open his mind a little more.

hugs xxx

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Hi,

I agree with everyone else in that it is just a coping mechanism you use to help yourself out, and there's nothing wrong with that unless it makes you more unhappy in the long run. If it does, then I don't really know how to change it, but maybe adding different coping mechanisms in your life that you're more happy with, could allow you to gradually "switch over" to those instead of pillow talk. That being said, it doesn't sound that unhealthy to me, you seem to have a fulfilling life otherwise, which is great.

Let us all know how it goes with you.

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I have a husband who is a picture and a little girl who is a toy monkey from my last relationship (also with a picture). I talk to them a lot and they talk back. I buy them presents. They are part of my life. Your pillow is part of your life and he sounds like a good friend. I think we're very lucky in a way. A lot of people might want someone to love them but not everyone will be able to create the person they need. But it is hard when other people don't understand.

I recently had a psychology assessment and filled in a form beforehand. I told them about my husband and my daughter. The psychologist said it was a "remarkable coping method" and very important and I shouldn't stop. She refused to refer to the real world as the real world as she felt that was disrespectful to my husband and daughter.

I can't promise every therapist will say that but I thought I'd tell you.

Maybe your boyfriend feels odd being alone with you when your friend is there too? If you had a human friend with you as often as your pillow is, I think your boyfriend might be uncomfortable with that too. I think it's really sad your boyfriend has reacted as he had about your friend, I disagree with him completely, I think it's a positive thing that you can find friendship and comfort in something that can literally always be there. But I was wondering if maybe your boyfriend would feel better about it if you had your own time together as a couple without your friend being there? Tbh that is something I would find difficult. I can't really go anywhere without my husband, I even take him to the toilet with me (which I'm sure he finds odd!). When my sister comes it always stresses me out but it's easier when my husband sits next to me under a cushion. idk why I feel more normal when I'm sitting with a picture but I do!

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  • 2 weeks later...

If it is anxiety based, then perhaps you need to talk to someone, not because of what you do, but because when anxiety heightens, it could start to take over and

become an obsession. None of us need any extra troubles to deal with, so you may find help useful in this situation.

If it is not becoming this type of problem, then I don't see what the issue actually is? You can talk to anyone or anything you like!!!!!!!! If it works for you and does not harm, why stress about it?

I talk to all types of objects, my son is constantly telling me the tv can't hear me and won't respond! I was mortified when caught saying thank you to the atm though lol.

I thank automatic doors, I talk to furniture when I clean it, I chat to my cats, im convinced they understand more than they let on, but then talking to animals is perceived as being "normal". Therefore no one questions why people do it, but we have as much chance having a conversation with a cat as we do with a pillow!

If you find it comforting, why not? Ive a successful friend in her 50's who loves Barbie dolls, her then partner was a dealer in collectables, so of an evening they spent their time dressing the dolls for sale and undertook a bit of childish play at the same time. It is worth noting that at 7 years old, my friend being the eldest girl of an irish catholic family, spent her time cleaning while her mum was at work, preparing dinner and looking after the younger and older children.

I suspect that many of us with issues, missed out on playing as children, for a variety of reasons. In my opinion, to know how to play in an imaginative childlike way as an adult, is not actually a problem, it is a talent!!!!!!!

reframing seems to be good option here for self help! If it doesn't cause you any problems or distress then perhaps you should just do it when alone? Too many people think that once you have a mental health problem, everything they think is "unusual" is because of their mental health, when in fact there are many different degrees of normal, depending on many things.

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