Kalli Posted August 21, 2014 Report Share Posted August 21, 2014 Wondering if anyone can help. Ive had 5 sessions of psychotherapy so far and im finding it difficult. I feel like shes asking me questions that are putting thoughts in my head that i wouldnt otherwise of had about people close to me and these thoughts are making me paranoid or if i acted on them would alienate me from people who i love. I dont know how else to describe it so i hope it makes sense. Help anyone?? please? for instance i was talking about my partner and she asked if i thought he hadnt cheated because i thought he idnt have the time or because i trusted him(was relevant to what i was saying) she said because someone will always find the time. It made me really mad but also worried. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Threemoons Posted August 22, 2014 Report Share Posted August 22, 2014 Hi Kalli, nice to meet you. You're making perfect sense, I understand your fears. I don't think you'll act on your thoughts though, as the fear will keep you from acting. It's the very fundamental of impulse phobia. Could you tell your psychotherapist that her questions are putting unpleasant thoughts in your head? I believe communication is the key there. Try to be communicative also with your partner. I wish you the best of luck. Sending you hugs and love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenny1471 Posted August 22, 2014 Report Share Posted August 22, 2014 Hi Welcome to the forum.. I am sorry to hear that psychotherapy is proving to be difficult. I think therapy can often be very difficult and it's a brave thing to do really. I wonder if you're able to talk to the therapist about what you've said here? It may be that she doesn't realise these things, so talking it through with her may give her and you the opportunity to talk about it and get it all out in the open. I know personally it took me about 8 months before I even began to start trusting my therapist enough to talk to her about how I felt about what she was saying to me, so I realise that's not going to be an easy task, but I guess I just think it could help if you are able to do that. She may not realise how you're feeling about her words. I do hope things improve for you soon and that therapy helps with your recovery Jenny x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoBrown Posted August 22, 2014 Report Share Posted August 22, 2014 Hugs I hope your ok xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalli Posted August 22, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2014 Thanks everyone for your kind words. Im still left wondering if she should be saying these things to me in the first place, is this what therapy is like? I will speak top her though but i feel she will tell me anything to keep me going because she is making money out of me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenny1471 Posted August 23, 2014 Report Share Posted August 23, 2014 Hi I think your questions are valid, as in, should she be saying these things in the first place. I guess that's why I was encouraging you to speak to her about it because she may not realise the impact it is having on you.. she may be thinking it's helpful.. or she may be coming at things from HER experience (although as a counsellor she should be self aware and know about transference/projection) so yes that's why really I thought talking to her may help. Also not all therapists are the same, of course.. they're all human with their own personalities so it may be that you may get on better with another counsellor? I don't know if you can talk to her about that and ask for someone else, if you felt that would help.. but I guess part of me would encourage you to just try to work through things with this counsellor first. If things are still so difficult and not helpful then maybe review it? Therapy is not easy so it could be that it's hard work regardless of which therapist you see.. but if your gut is telling you something isn't right with this counsellor then maybe listen to that, talk to her and/or try someone else if you can. I hope things go well for you x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalli Posted August 23, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2014 Hi I think your questions are valid, as in, should she be saying these things in the first place. I guess that's why I was encouraging you to speak to her about it because she may not realise the impact it is having on you.. she may be thinking it's helpful.. or she may be coming at things from HER experience (although as a counsellor she should be self aware and know about transference/projection) so yes that's why really I thought talking to her may help. Also not all therapists are the same, of course.. they're all human with their own personalities so it may be that you may get on better with another counsellor? I don't know if you can talk to her about that and ask for someone else, if you felt that would help.. but I guess part of me would encourage you to just try to work through things with this counsellor first. If things are still so difficult and not helpful then maybe review it? Therapy is not easy so it could be that it's hard work regardless of which therapist you see.. but if your gut is telling you something isn't right with this counsellor then maybe listen to that, talk to her and/or try someone else if you can. I hope things go well for you x Thanks so much for replying. im going to talk to her on wednesday and see what she says. She hasnt really explained how the therapy will help or where shes going with it and i am somewhat confused by it. Therapy is extremely stressful, ive had alot of the years but never with a psychotherapist. I just dont get how talking how talking can improve things in my head but then i think it must work or it wouldnt be used. if only I could wake up tomorrow without this illness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artemis84 Posted August 23, 2014 Report Share Posted August 23, 2014 if only I could wake up tomorrow without this illness. Oh, how I wish this too - I think we all do! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalli Posted August 28, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 28, 2014 So after speaking to her i still know nothing. I asked her how it was going to help me etc and she answered like a bloody politician then told me maybe i should only have 3 more sessions. What a waste of my time and money. I was pinning all my hopes on this and it hasn't worked. Feel so hopeless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenny1471 Posted August 29, 2014 Report Share Posted August 29, 2014 Oh I'm sorry to hear that... Can you try a different therapist? Sounds like maybe this one wasn't the best for you. Really hope you are ok xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalli Posted August 29, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 29, 2014 I am ok thanks. Dont think i'll bother looking for another as ive been told that the waiting list im on for the nhs isnt too much longer. I just seriously wonder how these people qualify. Ho[e you are well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Threemoons Posted August 29, 2014 Report Share Posted August 29, 2014 Aw Kali, I'm sorry she wasn't a good therapist for you. I know how terrible it is when someone puts all his hope in someone who isn't worth it in the end. Hope the nhs waiting list isn't too long and that you can be offered a better suiting therapy. Stay well, dear. I send you kisses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoBrown Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Hey Kalli, I hope your NHS Phycology Assessment is soon, I am still doing myn with the NHS and this week is my last one, I had 4 sessions in total spaced 2 weeks apart, on the whole it can be a stressful experience but hope the NHS will be able to help you understand more of about why you are struggling and then give you some options of what kind of help maybe the best to help you. All the very best xx hugz xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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