Jump to content
Mental Health Forums

Just Been Diagnosed Yesterday.


Tara91

Recommended Posts

Hi there. I am not really sure what to do with this or how to use this site but I just would like to say Hi I have been diagnosed with emotionally unstable personality disorder.

I finally have an answer although I don't feel any better for it at least I now no why I am so ... well just like I am. I am 23 years old and I have been feeling "odd" for the best part of 5 years maybe even more I wont go into all my issues right now however 1 thing that has reassured me is that there are people out there who can actually understand how I feel and I would really like to talk to some people. My family and what little friends I have try and help but sometimes I just feel it hinders.

I have a 1 year old little girl and I am having a "up" time right now however I can change as quick as switching a light and I feel pure rage how do people cope with the "downs" the anger, the pure emotion of just wanting to end it all?

Like I said Im new to this so im sorry I don't know what to say im just looking for people to talk to about this who understand and have maybe known for a while or even just found out themselves.

Please tell me if I have done anything wrong in this post just looking for help xxx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Tara

I'm new here too, so welcome! I'm very close to a diagnosis of bpd. I absolutely understand what you're going through and I guess this is a good place to come for support. I've found people in my life don't understand. They find me difficult.

I relate to your light switch comment! When I suddenly spiral down I tend to try and get out of the house or listen to mood lifting music, although I have tended to dwell on things which just makes things worse. I find my rages have to pass on their own.

I hope you get through this down time. Hugs xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hello :) Welcome to you too :)

I really felt like I was on my own! For years I have felt as though its everyone else and I've just thought that people annoy me and that its their fault but I am coming to realise that maybe it is me.

My family have just had to "put up with me" over the years but friends don't have to and that explains why I have such little friends. I just feel this bolt of anger rage threw me and I flip out I feel like I become the hulk my heart races, I get hot and start shaking I shout and then burst into tears and cant cope with anything and that's just when I get angry I feel as though I have to hide myself from anyone just so they don't have to be put threw it. I suffer serious anxiety and depression aswell I try to get out the house for my daughter or just dance around the house but like I said its like a light switch. But you are right it does pass but I just feel so bad after, I can become so nasty to people and say things so hurtful but I don't remember it after.

I just want to be different now it feels like its been my whole life I feel bad for friends ive lost as they were good friends I just couldn't see it.

Good luck with your diagnosis I hope they can help you, I have kind of just been left to my own devices now I haven't been given any follow up help yet.

Big hugs to you xxx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi and welcome I hope you find this place useful it's full of lovely kind caring people. Are you on any medication to help with your symptoms? Xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hello, Thank you for replying :)

When I was diagnosed yesterday the Dr said there is no medication for BPD I was prescribed Sertraline 11 months ago however that made me worse and he has suggested to try Fluoxetine another antidepressant I am unsure if that will help as I don't feel its me depression that's the main problem it the extreme happy where I have to run up and down the stairs 8 times, sing, dance, talk really fast shake and then swap to the extreme opposite. they just don't seem to no how to help me :(

Tara xxx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I take an anti depressant and anti psychotic to try and stabilise me. I get periods of depression which is most of the time but also get what you describe were I have so much energy and can't calm down he's hoping the anti psychotic will help. I have other diagnosis as well as Bpd so it's hard to know what he's treating although I did dbt to try to help regulate my emotions but ending up feeling worse x

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why cant it just come with 1 thing? Like only BPD or just Depression never simple is it. I'm scared to ask the doctor to try more medicines as I think that they are writing it down and think that I am thinking of excuses of ways just to get tablets and then going to report me for abuse of drugs (probably nothing like that but I'm paranoid about it). I feel like I need stabilizing I'm so erratic with my changes its scary. Whats dbt? x

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's dialect behaviour therapy it's meant to the the best treatment for Bpd but it's hard to get in places and it isn't offered to everyone it's mostly I think for people who self harm and are at risk of seriously hurting themselves. A lot of people find it good I was just unlucky I think. I refused meds for yrs and was seen as non compliant cause I didn't want them now I'm on weeky scripts as I od od on them, it's hard to know what to do for the best x

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hello Tara91 welcome to the site!

I was diagnosed with BPD a couple of months ago, but I really already knew I had it from the symptoms etc.. it is very hard to deal with sometimes!

I dunno why your doctor says there is no medication, mood stabilizers are often given for that, not anti depressants!

I just finished some individual therapy and it really helped, and now I have started MBT group therapy, maybe you could ask for some of that? :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi

It's reassuring we are not the only ones. I thought it was just me too and was treated for depression many times over the years.

I've always taken fluoxetine which has always been good. Perhaps too good as I end up too happy! My docs also thinking I'm bipolar 2 due to a few hypomanic episodes lasting a number of weeks.

Have they not given you any indication of another appointment? I'm sure they'll just not leave you to it. It's difficult to take it all in at your appointments. Xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hello Everyone I greatly appreciate your replies I'm going to do this in order :D

Addy2 - It is really hard to no what to do best hopefully they will find something that is right for you soon I find it so frustrating when they make you do things that they think is "right" for you :) xxx

Ratherin - The doctor that I saw yesterday said that he is going to refer me to group therapy, he wasn't a doctor in a surgery he was the mental health consultant. I thought about mood stabilisers but he didn't mention them as I don't want him judging me I need to call my normal doctor on Monday so maybe I should talk to her about them what do you think? Keep me updated with the group therapy I'm very nervous about talking to people about it I cant do 1 on 1 as it ends up going into my past (as everything always does) and I'm not ready to talk about that just yet. xxx

Trashitall - I thought I had bipolar to begin with as it was only really the mental health thing that I had most the symptoms and someone I no has it the man who assessed me yesterday said its too frantic of mood changes to be that as I change moods within hours not weeks. I found that the last depression tablets made me have more suicidal mood swings and fits of anger then off of them and now I'm worried about taking them as I have it in my head now that they are bad for me :-S

Thank you again everyone I'm already finding this site helpful xxx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

you can talk to your doctor yes :) it's your choice!

Group therapy gets easier when you get to know the people, just difficult to start with!, but when will you be ready to deal with your past? never? it might be better to deal with it, just my opinion :)

feel free to pm me if you want a chat

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have tried dealing with it but there is to much anger and it makes me worse and I then turn to the very dark side and I cant do that while my daughter is so little. I am so worried about group are they nice or is there "clicks" might sound like a silly question. And ok ill call my doctor on Monday talk to her about it she the only professional person I think I can trust and I say Think loosely :). Im not sure how to pm just yet xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I sent you one :) will be at the top of your screen!

well the group i'm in some people are nice, some I don't think I will like, but that is the whole point of the therapy, to learn how to relate to people properly

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi three moons , thanks for the welcome!

Tara, how are you feeling today? I'm not sure im bipolar too but I've read double diagnosis is possible. I guess we'll see!

This might seem a bit daft , but I had an episode of rage this morning over almost nothing. I was ironing today's outfit and my iron spat out black stuff on my white top. I went nuts and smashed my iron 3 times across the board. Was soooo angry and managed to stop myself from ripping the top up! Does anyone else get these fits of rage? Xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I used too but I would have to be triggerd like if someone insulted me it hurt me then i would get angry and smash things I have wrecked my entrie house at times pulled all the curtains of the windows and ripped up my clothes left holes in walls and smashed phones and laptops it's not good I try not too now, deep breaths xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I won't do it in front of my kids I wouldn't put them through it so that helps prevent it and it's only when I'm triggered and it's usually my partner who does that although there has been times when I'm out I've lost my temper with people who have stressed me out but I usually just swear at them. I usually find walking away helps that and the fear of what my partner will do if I break anything more it's not easy though I know x

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...