bee Posted November 27, 2016 Report Share Posted November 27, 2016 CW: I was diagnosed with EUPD/BPD this year, but I've been struggling with my mental health (depression, anxiety, dissociation) since I was 11 and I'm 19 now. Everyday is so difficult, and everything is so intense all of the time - my emotions are all over the place and they are always so intense and I can't control them. It's like I see everything in colour. I get so attached to certain people, and I constantly message them because I feel like without them I'll die - and I fear them leaving more than anything, and then I push them away and then try to pull them back. And then they eventually do leave and it breaks me. I've self-harmed since I was 11, so I have a lot of scars all over my legs and some on my arms. At the minute, I'm doing everything I can to not give in to the suicidal thoughts but it's getting harder every day. That's not even everything but I can't go into everything here. I feel so alone, and none of my friends or family really understand it - they try and I don't blame them at all. I just wish I had someone to talk to who understands it. I guess that's why I'm here? My doctor suggested going to a forum, so I came here. I'm sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddy harper Posted November 27, 2016 Report Share Posted November 27, 2016 You have nothing to feel sorry about it sweetheart everybody needs a little bit of help every now and again and is nothing wrong with asking for it You are not alone sweetheart because everybody on this forum has one thing in common we all have mental health issues so we can all support each other so we can all relate to each other and understand what each other is going through on a daily basis I have serious problems getting out of bed in the morning but I still get out of bed even though my muscles feel like complete lead absolutely horrible I think that's the antipsychotics I have the blame for that or is the morphine or the sedative I have no idea I still keep fighting because I think it's important to Plus I don't want to let my mental health problems real my life just because I have them that doesn't make me who I am I hope that made sense Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lululula Posted December 31, 2016 Report Share Posted December 31, 2016 Bee, You are not alone. I totally understand. I also started to struggle with these issues at 11 and I am 20 now and have only just been diagnosed. BPD makes every minute of the day feel difficult, but it does and can get better with the right support. I came to the forum for the same reason. I think it's a really hard illness to understand even for people who have it. Don't lose faith. We are here and we feel your pain and we can support each other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hani4172 Posted January 19, 2017 Report Share Posted January 19, 2017 You really are amongst friends. We are all battling each and every day. Take comfort in the fact that you can write your thoughts on here, in complete certainty that us reading, do 'get it', and if from personal experience, we can offer any helpful advice we will xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gracecaul Posted March 9, 2017 Report Share Posted March 9, 2017 I wish I could meet people like you, other people with BPD. I completely understand how you feel and I know we could support each others feelings and intensities. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
youaregood Posted March 21, 2017 Report Share Posted March 21, 2017 Hi! First of all you shouldn’t feel sorry for sharing here. This is what this forum is for (right?). In my opinion you have a belief that you cannot be happy unless being in touch with your friends. You rely your well being on other people, while all the feelings good and bad come from your inside. If you want to be happy, you are the only one who can create this feeling. Beliefs are easy to change if you know how to do it. Everyone is suggesting going to a doctor, but there is a lot that we can do if you do a little research. Try to find something to do just by yourself. Whether it will be painting, playing instruments, going for a walk in the forest, it should be pleasant doing it alone. It’s good to have friends, no doubt about that, but it’s good to have some time just for you. That way you might stop feeling worried that people come and go – because you will be fine just being with you. By the way when you feel emotions that you feel you cannot control – tell yourself that you are releasing them. Subconscious mind is following your conscious instructions, so if you are saying “I’m letting these emotions go” it will happen as the body follows the subconscious mind. Mind-body connection. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danielcroos Posted June 9, 2017 Report Share Posted June 9, 2017 Having been diagnosed 15 years ago, my doctors never explained what it was or how it affected my life. I’ve felt so alone in this illness. It is encouraging to know it’s treatable and more common than previously known. Would love to chat with someone with the same disorder. We need each other to survive, I believe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RSxo Posted June 9, 2017 Report Share Posted June 9, 2017 9 hours ago, danielcroos said: Having been diagnosed 15 years ago, my doctors never explained what it was or how it affected my life. I’ve felt so alone in this illness. It is encouraging to know it’s treatable and more common than previously known. Would love to chat with someone with the same disorder. We need each other to survive, I believe. We all need each other to keep fighting. It's a hard battle as it is, so we need to fall back on an ally from time to time. Alone, we are weak, but together, we are mighty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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