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blingcrazy

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Hi guys,

I began using this website and writing on the forums regularly 2 years after being diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and major depressive disorder when I was 19 years old. I drifted away after about 3 years and now 10 years on, I turn 30 in a few days and I'm back again!

I am currently struggling with an aspect of BPD (which isn't listed in the diagnostic criteria but after some research, seems to be extremely common) that has just gotten worse and worse. I am ashamed and humiliated to admit that my present struggles are with compulsive lying. What is worse is that the lies are so extreme and have become so ingrained that I occasionally delude myself into believing they are true.

Yes it's appalling. I am a disgrace. But I can honestly state that none of the lies I tell are thought of in advance, premeditated or planned. They just spew out of my disgusting mouth akin to verbal diarrhoea.

So I doubt that I will be interacting with everyone on the forums much like I used to. I really just plan on creating a blog and documenting my story.

To those who will immediately judge me- feel free. I don't agree with the phrase "walk a mile in my shoes" because my shoes only fit me. But before you do judge, maybe take the time to get to know me a bit first.

 

Bling

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Hi blingcrazy,

Sorry to hear about what you're going through. The fact that you've acknowledged the problem is a big step in the right direction, so well done for that. I'll be looking forward to a blog about your experiences! We're here to support you - hope you feel better soonx

Much love <3

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bling,

We all go through different phases as we journey forward, I say do what helps and if blogging is what will feel right, then write your insight, and wisdom.

xoxo,

Sah

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

HI Saharah Blue,

Ive been away too. This place helps me so much, glad to see you're coming back for support.

Me, Ive just got 3 balck cats in a 1 bed flat; havn't hoovered, food is bottle of wine and ginsters pasty. Hey ho.

 

Reb

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hi bec, wow lots of peeps stopping, glad you checked in, I am currently having a break from drink, but I can clearly recall that no food have a nip instead.

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