Help! BPD break up

[Bubblegum36]

I understand that the reply I will get is "reflect on yourself, get away from the relationship" etc but we actually managed a healthy relationship until he entered a very stressful time in his life. Moving into an unfurnished flat, being off sick because of a psychotic episode, his adoptive mum removing herself from his life etc. 

Our relationship ended. We still speak and see each other, recently it's been every day. We have slept together a couple of times, not intentional and boundaries need to be stronger. He says "there is a part of me saying I need to let go and be with you because I want to be with you, but there is a louder part telling me it won't work, our relationship is doomed to end" and he is attracted to a female friend (which is annoying, but I understand that he is trying to escape the reality of his situation). His mental health has deteriorate since breaking up too, he says he still feels like he is self destructing. 

 

My question is, I want to repair our relationship and support him through this difficult time (while being mindful of my own wellbeing) - are there things that would potentially stop our relationship from ever working? Are there things I could do that could improve the chances of us getting back together? 

I care deeply for this guy, and to my surpise our relationship was positive up until his life got very very stressful. I'm not co dependent, just we had a wonderful relationship and it is life that has caused this complication. 

[Saharah Blue]

That is tough, because you still see yourself in the relationship and it sounds like he doesn't.

The most important help during any life struggle mental or otherwise is people that are consistent in their words and behavior.

You may have to find your own way to accept that being that kind of support/friend also means that you cannot expect anything romantic in return. It is always difficult to watch people you love struggle. But if you have it in you to be a rock for someone then do.