timbawundakin Posted April 25, 2013 Report Share Posted April 25, 2013 When you constantly get strung along and involved with manipulators because you dont feel worthy of anything else , but then start to wish you had somone elses life cos yours is so lonely and scary and mucked up and theres no way out cos youre being bullied by the controllers and you cant get away from them cos that would be like sawing your own leg off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted April 25, 2013 Report Share Posted April 25, 2013 When everything pools on the surface, almost as if the rain of every day life and interactions is collecting in puddles on the walls you've built up internally, and only a few drops, if any at all, can drip into the void you keep protected inside. The drops echo, and remind you of your loneliness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 You think everything is fine in your relationships with people only for them to suddenly switch and hate you and reject you because of the hundreds of things you've done to upset them in the past It's like a switch comes on and they say "fuck it your too much to handle" And you feel alone yet in a way it's safer as atleast alone is a feeling your used to Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When you find yourself questioning your every move, you know people are treating you bad but you can't get the courage to tell them to stop because 1) you don't know if your right or not and your scared that if your wrong they'll leave 2) you know your right but convince yourself you must deserve it deep down so you let it carry on and blame yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When one day you think about how much you want a partner and kids and a happy life... Then you start to wonder if its worth it and if your strong enough to keep up the act of "I'm ok" everyday for the rest of your life, You start to think being alone is the only way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When your made to feel like a manipulative liar when you get upset or act "bpd" Your made to feel so scared to show any signs of your condition because people judge you so harshly and the slightest slip up now could be the last straw for them When you convince yourself bpd is a thing you can mask and never reveal... Then it comes screaming, crashing, flooding out in the worst possible ways and your back to square 1 again Back to where you knew you'd end up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When you want to cry so much because of how hard this condition is to handle but you can't because you feel like all your doing is indulging in self pity like a selfish person When you write numerous posts on a forum like right now then start to think you've made everyone hate you as you've written so much When your doctor looks at you in confusion when you tell him the term "bpd" ... When that one look of confusion tells you everything you need to know. You're in this alone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When you go to bed at night wishing you didn't wake up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When you love someone so much but your so tired of being the reason for every argument, the reason for every hurtful word Your tired of being around them and feeling nothing but guilt because looking at them reminds you of your mistakes Looking at them is like looking at the one thing you never want to loose slowly leaving your grip Looking at them makes you feel like you don't know how to love, how to act, how to be. You were never taught. And you feel unworthy. Your whole inside is screaming at you to go and just be alone, to save yourself and them But your driving force, the one that can't allow you to be alone makes you stay..so you carry on. Carry on hoping tomorrow you'll be better. You feel selfish for staying but you'd feel worse if you left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fanta Posted April 26, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When you feel like everyone hates you and no matter how many times they say they don't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoppyCow96 Posted April 26, 2013 Report Share Posted April 26, 2013 When you tell yourself no one will ever love you and you dont deserve happiness Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liciane Posted April 27, 2013 Report Share Posted April 27, 2013 When you love someone so much but your so tired of being the reason for every argument, the reason for every hurtful word Your tired of being around them and feeling nothing but guilt because looking at them reminds you of your mistakes Looking at them is like looking at the one thing you never want to loose slowly leaving your grip Looking at them makes you feel like you don't know how to love, how to act, how to be. You were never taught. And you feel unworthy. Your whole inside is screaming at you to go and just be alone, to save yourself and them But your driving force, the one that can't allow you to be alone makes you stay..so you carry on. Carry on hoping tomorrow you'll be better. You feel selfish for staying but you'd feel worse if you left. Tan, thanks for share all this posts! You were inspired yesterday!! They helped me a lot!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted April 28, 2013 Report Share Posted April 28, 2013 When you feel like you took in a sharp breath years ago, when things were so hard and scary it's all you could do just to stop the pain... but you never let the breath go, and now you don't even know how to. And you feel like you're holding things at bay, away from the inner part of yourself and you're stuck that way, like a statues and no matter how hard you try... you don't know how to do anything else even if you want to. You're frozen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoppyCow96 Posted April 28, 2013 Report Share Posted April 28, 2013 when you feel nothing but pain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ruffryder Posted April 29, 2013 Report Share Posted April 29, 2013 when you can try and think positive but it has no meaning and the smallest negative thought can bring your world crashing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ruffryder Posted April 30, 2013 Report Share Posted April 30, 2013 when you work all day on dealing with your emotions and accepting them, then when you wake up the next day its all reset to square one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
x-Bliss-x Posted May 1, 2013 Report Share Posted May 1, 2013 - When someone says "think positive", you think "you just dont understand" - When someone says "you seem better today" you think "you have no idea". And it hurts even more to be mis-read. But at the same time, you want to keep up the act to keep them happy. - When you sit on the floor crying for hours, asking yourself why your still here. - When you feel like a burden on everyone around you. - When you fear that if you tell the person you care so much about what's really going on in your head, you'll lose them. But that if you don't, you'll lose yourself. - When just holding a razor blade can calm you rather than scare you even more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted May 1, 2013 Report Share Posted May 1, 2013 When doing something drastic is preferable to doing things the way you 'should' do. It's the only time you feel you have real power. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoppyCow96 Posted May 1, 2013 Report Share Posted May 1, 2013 When you go through desperate lengths just to stop someone from leaving you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlbertBenedict Posted May 4, 2013 Report Share Posted May 4, 2013 You and your stupid and randomly changing thoughts.. they are the only companion you have left with.. its just like saying that "I HATE BEING SINGLE, BUT NOT READY FOR A RELATIONSHIP".. it doesn't really have any msense but yes it do have meaning, which everyone wont b able to understand.. and if you do understand then feel proud of who you are.. :-) ......................................................... lymedisease Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frogsplash Posted May 4, 2013 Report Share Posted May 4, 2013 when you realise the time and you've spent hours staring into nothing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyStrange Posted May 5, 2013 Report Share Posted May 5, 2013 when you realise the time and you've spent hours staring into nothing Yup.. I do this one a lot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saharah Blue Posted May 5, 2013 Report Share Posted May 5, 2013 When your plan B to any kind of failure / life disappointment is, " I suppose I could just end it if I really needed to". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frogsplash Posted May 5, 2013 Report Share Posted May 5, 2013 when you love your abuser. when you want to please him / her and will do anything for a fleeting moment of recognition. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ruffryder Posted May 5, 2013 Report Share Posted May 5, 2013 When nothing means anything to you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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