Opinions On Medications

[Ocean Wolf]

I hear a lot of people say that medications helped them. I have heard that medications don't work for some people, but it's a small percentage from a mental health organization. I have heard someone insist that medications can't make anyone worse. They made me worse.

The pamphlets on medications say the side effects are "mild and temporary" and maybe they are for some people. But not for others. My friend tells me his mom is dead. The medicated version is in her place, but he wants his mom back. I could function better off meds than on them, the side effects were so bad. And they never went away until I got off them. Some still stayed.

I don't know in what way the meds did this, but they made my illness worse too. Before I was put on them, I would get suicidal once in a while, but I didn't do anything. When I was put on them I lost who I was. It's like they shut off everything about me other than the depression which just grew. The anti-depressants made me so friggin depressed, I was suicidal 24/7. The anti-psychotics also made me depressed. They shut off everything but the depression. How do you know who you are when medication shuts off who you are and your psychiatrist tells you that means they're working? That is one of the main reasons I feel like I'm not supposed to exist. I still know who I am (especially now I'm off that junk), but I feel wonder... am I real?

I am wondering if anyone else finds that meds make them worse. Or is this more of what makes me "not real"?

[Dreamer]

I'm very sorry meds have not helped you, I would keep trying till I got something that worked, and it almost sounds as if those were wrong meds for you to make the side affects THAT bad you know....When I first started taking my anti dep. I was suicidal like a maniac, very aggitated but it did pass after a week or two, I take Effexor XR and use to take Cymbalta which was both, fast working and wonderful except the suicidal tendencies skyrocketing...The 'not here' not real' not know who I am' sounds like identity issues or dissociation to me, I had an episode of 'not being real' about 2 weeks ago or longer and literally didn't know who I was or where I was...my dr. says it's the 'out of body' experiences that goes along with Diss. If the anti d's did not help you I would ask for different ones, depression is so so hard on a person let alone the rest of what we have...I know I took prozac and celexa 4 depression and those did nothing at all...so changing me after 3-4 times found me one that worked finally. All trial and error unfortunately. But my meds have made me better in my raging sense yes, and all I take is my ani d, a nerve pill, and something to sleep called trazadone. Mt pdoc said a quarter of my problems are worse when not sleeping, and that for me was everyday...My bf also who has paranoi.skizzy and bpd was put on depakote when he was first going to a dr. and wellbutrin and vistaril...none worked for him at all, and he specifically said he was zombifide...It took a few years, several shrinks, and now a little nerve pill solves his problems. I wish you luck though.

[Ocean Wolf]

Well, I know who I am. When I'm on meds though, I am nothing but depression in a shell it seems like. Since I knew who I was before, I'd say the meds made me worse. I have been on an extensive list of them. When I once commented that meds made me worse, I was told sharply that meds can't make me worse. Bu that is still what happened. They have been too disastrous for me to think it's worth risking them again.

[trinityjlw]

It has taken me 12 years to get the right combination...but something is working now. Good luck xx

[InnerPeace]

They made me worse.

Although they're needed sometimes and do help people, they also detach us from our emotions which can prevent real healing. They also make us more out of our bodies and ungrounded. If we can have the help we need without meds that is best.

[Faerielight]

ive had some bad side effects from meds, mainly physical.. liver probs, weight gain, breast milk, but the combo im on now has definitely helped stabilise me.

I'm a very low dose of antipsychotics now and low dose antidepressant compared to what i was on 2 years ago.

on these levels it doesnt stop me being in touch with myself or my emotions, but it levels off the highs and lows and the stability it has given me has offered me a platform to work hard on my issues with my cpn.

However meds arn't for everyone, i know, and my intention is to slowly taper off so i am no longer on the meds.

I have got off mirtazipine this year and decreased seroquel from 800mg to 100mg and have halved my dose of lorazepam, so i'm moving in the right direction.

[colourfulcarly]

i am not on meds myself partel due to the docs as i have a tenedance to store pills and when i'm on them i am completely out of it so dont really know what i am doing. and partel me when i have been on then i have had terrorble side effects which dont go away so i end up taking more tablets to help with the side effects of the tablets that helping wiv the side effects of the ones that r meant to help me if you get what i mean. and then i am on so many i cant remember what and when to take then this is cos the meds have changed me and i am not my normal self friends notice that i withdraw from them and go into myself which isnt good for my anyway.

i have been given may sequences of meds including antid's and antip's and benzo's and probable some more i just cant remember now i am only offered a few benzo's at a time no more htan 10 and they have to last me a month soz they have worked out in that time i will ususally take the 10 so now i only ever that them when really needed and usually when someone says something. the thing is they arent trin to help my wiv meds but also not therapy so i dont quite know whats happenin

[Vorpalblade]

(Dreamer, i love that piccy in your siggy )

[Ulrica]

Meds made me worse than I was before. I had serious weight gain (and for a normally quite skinny ex-ed girl it was very hard on me psychologically) and I also got terrible shakes in my hands (Lithium) and problems concentrating. I have now been off them for a bit over a year and I get comments that I am so much more me now. Before I was just an empty shell and had no real contact with my emotions, I used to say it was like living behind sound proofed glass.

The remains that are left are scars on my face from a Lithium induced type rash, my thyroid is still not functioning the way it should (I was fine before the meds, I got hypothyroidism from taking Lithium and even thought I've been off Lithium for over a year that still remains) not to mention the fact that therapy was somewhat wasted on me since I was wasted all the time on prescription drugs, I made more progress in the two months after I came off my meds then I did in the two years I was on them.

I'm not saying that meds don't help people, I've seen them do wonders on others and I am sure that they do work on some people and in some combinations. They just did nothing much for me. I think I tried over 25 types. Four different anti-psychotics, six different anti-depressants, four different types of mood stabilizers and countless of different anti-anxiety drugs... I'd hate to see what all this has done to my body internally, on top of all the damage I cause myself... So no, medication didn't work for me, I wish it had though since I could do with some serious stabilizing at times...

I too get that unreal feeling your describing, even though it was much, much worse when I was on the meds...

[Ocean Wolf]

I only questioned who I was on meds.

I know that identity issues are a symptom of BPD, but I don't have them. I know who I am. I know myself very well.

I did have them on meds, but I don't have them when I'm off meds.

And now I do once in a while because I've heard it repeated for the past few years that all I am is a figment of my diseased brain and people keep assuming things that aren't true about me.

But people who aren't me don't define who I am. I do. So I'd say, off meds, I have no identity issues.

[scarletgal]

the tough job is proving it to those with alphabet soup after their name...

It required being methodical and relentless.

Best of luck.

[Lily-Bee]

I think the whole meds things is a lot of trial and error, it took me years to find a good combo but now I am on a good one and its really helping me. But thats me, I know all people are different.

Lilly

[tripper]

I am currently taking moclobemide, neulactil, largactil and lithium.

Before I have had olanzapine, seroquel, mellaril, resperidone, effexor, lovan, luvox, zoloft, lexapro, cipramil, paroxetine, mirtazepine, endep and duloxetine... quite a few as you can see....

The jury is still out as to whether or not these will be the correct combo or not.

[Miko]

My last known psychiatrist was a dangerous person to know because 'she' said I should continue the venlafaxine when I stopped it because it made me agitated.

(Venlafaxine turns out good for some people - so that's not a disreccommendation. Also, I was taking far too much of it - i.e the amount prescribed was about 20 or more times larger than it should have been for a starting dose)

Those people who are the only ones with the prescription pads are suposed to be a source of support for us but when they turn out more work than they are worth, it can mean we have to go without any medicines.