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Checking In! (How Do You Feel Today)


piuma

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(((roxy)))

i am excited cos my latest John Cusack film will hopefully come today - wont be able to watch til tomoz if it does cos i will be at mums...

it will be my 42nd dvd i have of his - am i obsessed :wacko:

gotta admit tho - he is a well fit obsession to have tho !!! LMAO

love to all xx

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Not the best.

Next doors dogs are barking AGAIN.

The house is cold and everyone keeps leaving all the doors open.

I am still groggy from medication.

My wife is in a SHIT mood she is really angry with everything and whilst I was asleep she burned the kids breakfast (I bought them waffles and they were looking forward to it!).

I am lonely and all I want is someone OUTSIDE MY HOUSEHOLD to talk to but my computer seems empty of people this morning.

We are still thinking of the possible consequences of my son's temporary exclusion from school. I think it is that that has upset my wife :(.

And I find out that someone has set up a page on the internet specifically to take the piss out of me. Some people need to GET A HOBBY. Have they nothing better to do?

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Feeling quite bouncy, watching the F1 qualifying, always happy to see the drivers and things even if the racing gets dull lol. Jake Humphreys makes me chuckle ...

This is all good as a I had a big depressomatic session last night, and had a bout of insomnia too, so its nice to feel good and things.

Yus

Ross

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been very low, exhausted, couldn't face voluntary job so slept all morning, will be back there tomorrow, all ok. am handing over what's left of my money to my family for safe-keeping as i know that otherwise my impulsivity will kick in & i'll waste it on trying to spend myself to happiness. So, i guess if i achieve nothing else today, at least I have taken some control before i lose control again! one step at a time.

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How do I feel right now?

Fucking tragic. Dead, hopeless, lonely, ignored, fucked in the head. Too scared to die, with a desperate need to kill myself.

Try living with that.

Try it and realise no one can be 'alive' with that.

So the answer now is I am dead, whatever I do to myself. I am not alive to be hurt by YOU or myself.

Dead, dead in that stagnant water.

NO ONE CARES.

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I don't know how I feel, On one hand I feel numb-ish,neutral chilled out, but on the other hand I feel sort of down, cos my boyfriend who I hadn't seen for about a month (he was thinking about breaking up with me cos I'm obviously a bad girlfriend...and he decided to stay with me, Well he came up on Friday and has gone home again today cos of an argument we had yesterday....So basically I know he's gonna hang the breakup over my head again. Argh I hate men lol. I guess my mood is bittersweet O_o

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stupid.

i can't concentrate on anything. dbt group sucks, people are dropping out or not showing up and the leaders don't seem too organized D:

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