So Called Former Borderlines Are Really Full Of Bs

[Kittyclaws]

gun you say this is a game how is it a game hun? i think people just saying what they feel or sometimes read and live. the bullshit thing wasn't a good start but if you feel so bad sometimes or alot of times it feels like you never get better.Hugs Kitty.

[guntarded]

I believe to forever borderline this is a game. The rest of us have been mangled, bruised and dragged along in this game and suffer as a result.

[Kittyclaws]

i dont understand hun :wacko:

[guntarded]

i dont want to delve deeper into it kitty, it was to foreverborderline but now I have blocked him so its useless now reacting to any threads or posts.

Its too deep and triggering a topic to have proper debate on which could've have potential. I need to stay off the topic

[Kittyclaws]

ok hun i made enough drama here and don't want to upset anyone else. Hugs Kitty.

[Joshua]

No, I can't sleep, because forever said he's going to kill himself. So I am extra pissed at Josh for not doing something and for not being here, and I'm also pissed off with forever because now I can't sleep.

I have Uni tomorrow, and I am a single mum of a disabled kid. I'm tired and angry that this ABORTION of a thread was allowed to continue even though it is obvious to any fool it was pure trouble.

Big Fat "F". F for inconsiderate behaviour, F for poor judgement (Josh's)but Barbones you get an A for the fish slap

Before reading this I read a PM i received saying that you have very high expectations of me, i then arrive at this post and it seems that accurately describes whats going on here. I am not someone who is able to be here every hour of every day, neither am i someone who will please you with every decision i make but what i am is someone that does his best.

This situation is very sad where a member starts a thread and then threatens something when things become heated. In doing this causes great harm and guilt to those involved.

[starryeyesee]

for everyone suffering from BPD there is an excellent group on yahoo that does free DBT lessons with homework and feedback. that includes you forever borderline

starry

[*Summer*]

I have headache reading this :blink:

[toocrazy]

I think they should keep this thread forever and rename it: If you think you are a borderline read this thread.

The one thing that all of us should know is it is a difficult thing to convince a borderline of feeling opposite of what they are feeling. I've read AJ and I have to say she still sounds like a borderline to me. Kind of like, AJ you aren't hiding it very well when you flip and flop around with yourself at the center. But I've also read Josh's book and do believe he did the horrific work to face the wounds. I believe there is hope to recover if we can heal the wounds that created this terrified creature that tries to live inside us. It is the core of bpd, the mortal wounds inside us. Josh reacts much like a normal twenty something (actually seems much more mature) guy walking into a room of mad and crying anxious people all running up to him wanting him to fix it. He's just one guy watching that noone gets too wild, nothing more and nothing less. Occasionally he has a joke or two but not a whole bunch of lecturing and bla bla bla.

Forever you are entitled to your opinion. You had to know it would start what it started when you named Josh. No reason to play innocent here. But you yourself admitted that it may be all your extra issues that keep you from 'recovery' of bpd. When you remove all this emotion, all the this and that, you have always stood firm that you are 'hopeless'. No reason to say anything about anyone else, it isn't about anyone else. I think almost everyone that posted here tried to say, even it it wasn't said in a way you can hear it, Please don't give up hope. Please don't give up before the miracle. Please don't stop trying. Please believe there might be a way. That's all anyone really said. There is only one moment when hope is gone. Please don't let it go.

for all the girls, the guys that got upset. Nothing was said that was bad enough to do any real harm. Forever started the thread and ended the thread with his point made, he hardly ever wavered. Let's all keep hoping, believe that as long as we keep wanting to get better we can get better.

Josh please don't give up on us, there is no place like this in the world. Thank you for all you do.

to everyone

[foreverborderline]

I guess the board likes to censor people , crazy. what happened to freedom of speech ? I keep posting and it keeps being removed . NOW that my friends is too crazy for sure.

Anyway, I said in my removed post that I am sorry to all of you that this thread offended.

I am here, not OK, but maybe I will stick around and maybe I won't. Off to maybe try and get a doctor now.

I still believe that people can manage Bpd but never be cured from it.

[foreverborderline]

Well, I saw a doctor today finally (free MH clinic that has minimal services) and he said to me that Bpd is in fact incurable but treatable with therapy and meds. He said my chances of recovery are slim due to how long it has been untreated and my thinking resisting treatment and the substance abuse. He said with DBT/CBT and meds I can maybe get better but only if I embrace treatment and stay clean , staying clean is impossible for me it seems. But the basis of this is that Bpd is incurable, at least I know I am right there - it is good it is treatable , maybe I can get better eventually although doubt it.

[CrippleAndStarfish]

Look, i hate to point this out again, as so many people have done already - but hell, i'm going to.

You keep saying it is 'incurable'

Say we have a newbie here who is really struggling. They've just been diagnosed with BPD and are reaching out desperately for any sort of help available, looking for comfort, reassurance, that there IS some hope.

And they see your topic, filled with you stating over and over that it's incurable and so it's pointless to have any hope at all of getting better. How is that gunna make them feel?

Again, that is ONE persons opinion that it is incurable.

Just because they are a qualified medical practitioner, does not mean they know everything.

You saying you now know that you were right... that's not the case. All you actually know is that there is a medical professional who agrees with you that it is incurable.

My pdoc believes that it is curable. For some, yes, the journey is inevitably harder, due to co-morbid diagnoses, addictions, poor/lack of support network etc. and for some, the struggle may get too much for them to deal with any longer, But that does not mean that BPD is wholly incurable.

However - "maybe I can get better eventually" i like this. But, that isn't likely to happen without hard work. I hope that you get better too, i really do. As for the 'i doubt it' - that is fear talking, of course, you don't WANT to doubt it, you want to believe that you stand a good chance of feeling better, right? But to admit that, well, that's terrifying, because then, there's the pressure to do so, and not to 'fail'? Is that anywhere near close?

It's okay to be scared, terrified senseless even. But the statement you keep repeating - 'bpd is not curable' that is not only damaging to yourself, but also to others who have a more optimistic outlook, or those who don't understand much about it, struggling with the dx, and are looking for some hope, some proof that things can get better, etc etc.

I am glad you managed to see a doctor.

[Joshua]

The view of your one doctor is not the view of every doctor in the world. Try and remember that one opinion is not the only opinion.

[foreverborderline]

I did not say it , the doctor is the one that said it cannot be cured, and not just one but over 25 docs for the past 18 years have told me this. Maybe it is a culture thing, maybe in the U.S. it is believed incurable but not in UK or elsewhere, everything is more

difficult in America after all.

I do not wish to discourage the newbies, but someone has to stand up and tell the truth, not give false hope. BPD can only be managed and never be gotten rid of, we all should accept this. This is not a pretty illness, why do people try to paint the picture that way ?

I wish to give the newbie hope where there is little.

As for me, I do not think I will get better, I wonder if I even want to anymore, losing my dx of bpd would make me lose my self, my identity and my core and that would make me worse. Of course I want to feel happy , but that feels really hard right now. As I have been told over and over, I am stuck with this, why not just try to manage the symptoms.

I think once we all can accept that there is no cure, we all can maybe get better. Saying it can be cured is being in denial. Maybe just try to manage it , that is our best hope.

[foreverborderline]

The view of your one doctor is not the view of every doctor in the world. Try and remember that one opinion is not the only opinion.

That is fair, but how about 25 docs and many, many counselors - seems more people believe it cannot be cured than believe it can.

Some illnesses can be cured but some can only be managed, bpd is one that can only be managed. Believe me , I have studied this for a very long time.

[foreverborderline]

Am I right or wrong ? I hope we all can see that saying it can be cured really hurts people, as we need hope but not false hope.

[Data]

I am inclined to agree with foreverborderline. The doctors may say you are cured because you tick off less boxes on their criteria list, but you are not necessarily happy.

[RedMan]

I am inclined to agree with foreverborderline. The doctors may say you are cured because you tick off less boxes on their criteria list, but you are not necessarily happy.

Happy is not the opposite of BPD. There are plenty of unhappy people who don't have BPD.

The health professionals I have spoke with have had varying opinions, some say it can only be managed, some say recovery is possible. But they all make the same point, to become recovered/managed takes a lot of effort and a lot of pain, every additional problem you add (addiction, depression, etc) makes the effort and pain required jump an awful amount. 1 in 10 people with BPD kill themselves, I don't know what the general consensus is with regards the ratio between successful suicide and failed attempts but the fact that 10% do kill themselves tells you nasty this condition is.

You could argue that because the treatment often makes us worse for periods of time that the treatment process itself is fairly deadly but the hope is there that this illness can be beaten, I don't know about anyone else but that gives me hope of living a better quality of life and it helps at the times when I am curled up in a ball crying my eyes out because of the mental torment I am suffering.

[Data]

Happy is not the opposite of BPD. There are plenty of unhappy people who don't have BPD.

Yes. But there are plenty of unhappy people who don't "act out" any more. They have stopped cutting themselves. They feel like shit every day, they just have a better way of dealing with it. So the doctors say they no longer have BPD. Thats not recovery to me.

[Dani]

recovery is very much a personal thing.

[Roses]

*bangs head on wall again much to the satisfaction of forevereborderline*

[Villan]

*hands roses one of they boxing padded helmet things cos she is worried she will do herself some damage and she doesnt want her friend to hurt*

now u may bang away m'dear

xxxx

[Barebones]

Sry cant express or explain, really want to on this subject, but with roses.

[Dani]

do you have a spare helmet chips...i may join u all :)

[Villan]

*sets up a stall*

"padded helmets... all colours and sizes, get em whilst i got em...."

lol ;)