kathtoms Posted October 23, 2004 Report Share Posted October 23, 2004 HI, Im new here have had been diagnosed with BPD for a few yrs now... so I have done a fair bit with some short lived 'happniess' or rather results. I was just wanting to know how do we really live with this? K Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tory Posted October 23, 2004 Report Share Posted October 23, 2004 With great difficulty. Its hard to live with but u just do. Sometimes its ok and u can cope alright other times its really difficult to cope anymore. I dont think theres any particular way to live with it you just do. This place is great for support when it gets hard. Dont know if that makes much sense anyway but its hard question. Welcome to the site! Take care Tory Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooler Posted October 23, 2004 Report Share Posted October 23, 2004 HI, Im new here have had been diagnosed with BPD for a few yrs now... so I have done a fair bit with some short lived 'happniess' or rather results. I was just wanting to know how do we really live with this?<{POST_SNAPBACK}> Hi Kathtoms, I'm new too, and I probably don't have a good knowledge of this stuff, but I can say how it has been for me. Over the years I have gradually managed to stop acting on triggers and to be aware of mood changes as they happen. The literature tells us that BPD often diminishes with age. It is a great day - the first time you have a real storming mood change and you control it. Maybe this is just going out for a walk (I've had a few of those!). But the day that you don't lash out at the people near to you, it's a big achievement. Also, when someone rejects you, and you take a wave of emptiness, of abandonment, and the anger rises - and then you let yourself feel it and say to yourself "I know what this is". And you let yourself feel it, all of it. Maybe my symptoms have not been as bad as some others, I don't know, but I have lived through hellish times in my youth (I have no contact with my birth family) and then it's been easier in recent years. The shape is the same but the intensity is less now that I have recognised and faced the stuff bit by bit. There comes a time when the anxiety rises, and you know you could reduce it by making a diversion, by picking on someone, by dumping on someone, and you don't. You take the anxiety for what it is, your own. We each find our own strategies for survival, and my most effective strategy has been to know that I have a mood disorder and try to encompass that reality. For me, it felt like I was turning a supertanker, the patterns were so deep, but I believe that I did make the turn. Good luck. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Betsy Posted October 23, 2004 Report Share Posted October 23, 2004 hang around kath and you will find out how we are dealing with it. you get to see first hand when we are struggling and down and you can see the support from the others on the site and they give suggestions or just show their concern. i guess for me there seems to be two overriding themes.. 1) distract and 2) this too shall pass (given enough time) other than that we deal with it through our friends and the feedback and care we recieve. it isnt easy but then it wasnt easy before we came to this community! bets Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angela Posted October 23, 2004 Report Share Posted October 23, 2004 Hi Kath - welcome to this site. I can't really answer your question atm as I am still at the bottom of learning how to live through this myself. I am using this site to meet likewise people, to get support and give support. I have a therapist, a psych, a care-co-ordinator and attend a day centre - but nothing seems to be enough, I need to find something inside me but I don't know what. Cooler - I found what you said very inspiring, it gave me a lot to think about, thank you x Angela x x x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kathtoms Posted October 24, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 24, 2004 HI, Im new here have had been diagnosed with BPD for a few yrs now... so I have done a fair bit with some short lived 'happniess' or rather results. I was just wanting to know how do we really live with this?<{POST_SNAPBACK}> Hi Kathtoms, I'm new too, and I probably don't have a good knowledge of this stuff, but I can say how it has been for me. Over the years I have gradually managed to stop acting on triggers and to be aware of mood changes as they happen. The literature tells us that BPD often diminishes with age. It is a great day - the first time you have a real storming mood change and you control it. Maybe this is just going out for a walk (I've had a few of those!). But the day that you don't lash out at the people near to you, it's a big achievement. Also, when someone rejects you, and you take a wave of emptiness, of abandonment, and the anger rises - and then you let yourself feel it and say to yourself "I know what this is". And you let yourself feel it, all of it. Maybe my symptoms have not been as bad as some others, I don't know, but I have lived through hellish times in my youth (I have no contact with my birth family) and then it's been easier in recent years. The shape is the same but the intensity is less now that I have recognised and faced the stuff bit by bit. There comes a time when the anxiety rises, and you know you could reduce it by making a diversion, by picking on someone, by dumping on someone, and you don't. You take the anxiety for what it is, your own. We each find our own strategies for survival, and my most effective strategy has been to know that I have a mood disorder and try to encompass that reality. For me, it felt like I was turning a supertanker, the patterns were so deep, but I believe that I did make the turn. Good luck. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Hi, Thank you all for your kind words... and cooler thank you so very much you reminded me of 4 mths ago when I was able to deal with and live with this... I am recommencing my therapy again... so i will take a little from what each of you said to get me through... but yes I do remember being able to deal with those times very gracefully and distract myself.. Thank you all! k Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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