bored-a-line Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 can anyone suggest careers that are suitable for a person with bpd. i was wondering, because i wanted to be so many different things from one week to the next when people were forcing me to decide. right now i feel i can only cope with stuff like data entry. am i being too pessimistic. anyone been refused a job for having bpd? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 what are you good at? what do you really enjoy? lorna Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted November 8, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 thats the problem! im good at different thibngs at different times, i want to do hugely different things from week to week. some days i'm excellent at analytical thinking, some days i'm really creative, other days i want to work around lots of people..dont you guys get that too? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooler Posted November 9, 2004 Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 can anyone suggest careers that are suitable for a person with bpd. i was wondering, because i wanted to be so many different things from one week to the next when people were forcing me to decide. right now i feel i can only cope with stuff like data entry. am i being too pessimistic. anyone been refused a job for having bpd? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Hi bored-a-line, This is an interesting subject for me. Although I don't have a BPD diagnosis, my work pattern is textbook. I am early retired now, but have a really weird work record. I would get into a job, do quite well (often with promotion) and then after a few years walk out of the door. The last time this happened I was teaching in a community college and had some over-promotion into management. That triggered the walk, even although I had been good at it and had been working in the college for 10 years. I was also the union rep at the time, but when the walk happened I didn't look for any redundancy or benefits, I just cleared off. This pattern has happened four or five times in my life, leaving me pretty much resigned to the path I seem destined for. The thing I would never do again is pretend I could do something and get myself hung up on it. Nowadays I don't commit any more and it suits me. Looking back, my advice would be to work in something that gives you freedom, and where the paranoia element is low. The last thing I would want is to get into a situation where I am being judged against others who don't have the emotional disadvantage, when that has happened to me it has been hell. In all my jobs, no one knew I had the instability, and I hid it carefully. Even now, if people ask, I am cautious about saying anything. I have owned up to some depression, as that feels somehow more acceptable to say, but I don't go deeper. The anonymity of this board has been such a good release! Oh well, not much help I'm afraid, but I wish you well bored-a-line. It will be good to hear some other work experiences and suggestions. Cheers, cooler, :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daisy Posted November 9, 2004 Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 I once read that people with BPD can have great succesfull careers, soemthing about wanting to be dedicated and putting all effort into one aspect of life. I know i thrive at my career and if i wasnt in managment id leave nad find another job at the top of the food chain cause thats kinda were i want to be. I think you need to find something that you are COMFORTABLE with and ENJOY doing. No-One can EVER fire you for being BPD, so i personally dont see this as an option or something to look at, at all. I hope you can find something that you enjoy it is purely 100% individual when it comes to careers I dont think the BPD limits us except by our own personal boundries. Hope I made some sense Take care katy :wub: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted November 9, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 thanks guys cooler, what you said about being judged against people who dont have emotional problems has happened a lot to me and its scared me into not going for any career as such. i just do jobs to make as much money as i need to go travelling or something then i take off. today ive been really down about the fact that in nearly 5 months i havent managed to get a 9-5 job. i feel good for nothing, when in fact the truth is i'm a really hard worker. i love being purposeful. the last job i had was being a medical trial volunteer..which was a pretty grim thing to do..definitely some self-harm intensions going on there.. i dont understand how to get people to hire me. it sucks. modern life is rubbish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verbena Posted November 9, 2004 Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 I have been in my job for 10 years. Before this, the longest I stayed at any job was 2 years. I think there are a few differences between this job and the others. For one thing, I am older, less agreeable to learning new jobs. I've often said that the only thing that keeps me is that I'm not good at meeting new people and learning new routines, building layouts (I'm a scream in a new building-can't find my way out of a bathroom stall). The best thing about this particular job is that my duties are many and varied. I don't have time to get bored with anything. I can drop what I'm doing and move on to something else if I need a change. Also, my work is with young, disabled adults, and so there is the reward aspect-I can't be going to hell if I'm good to these people, can I? My job makes me feel good about my time. I am the only person in my department. I have no immediate supervisor. The administrator has complete trust in me, and does not have clue one whether I'm screwing off or not. I usually work very hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted November 10, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 can i just make this thread an invite for everyone to share what job they do and how they deal with it, and whether or not it adds to their distress. it would be really helpful, thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calyps Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 I love my job. I love it because I can do it well and am lucky enough to work with the most understanding and lovely bunch of people. I'm a pre-assessment officer for Housing and Council Tax benefit for Bournemouth Borough Council. The job title makes it sound way more impressive than it really is, I'm on the bottom of the ladder as far as council hierarchy goes. A Dr told me that the govt and NHS are the best emp in UK because they subscribe to the whole 'Investors in People' thing, and I am protected under Disability Discrimination Act. I think the main difference for me is the communication as I've been honest about my limitations from the start (I've been there 18 months) and the people who I trust have been with me throughout my diagnosis so have learned as I have. I know how immensely lucky I am, I get told each day i am at work (I do have a lot of time off, but never get penalised) what a difference I make. Work has 2 of my strongest supporters who give me so much love and hope. I have my days when I want to jack it all in and go on benefits again but they pass and I had a good morning there this morning so I'm all 'I love it'. Ask me again when I've had a bad day! Anwen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ginny Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 Hi bored-a-line I have just started work as an Optical Technician (again) This means I work with the same people everyday and I dont have to deal with anyone I dont know - or members of the public, and that suits me fine... I only work three days a week and that too is really good cos I get stressed out with it after a while - I tried full-time at the same place but found that I was working so much that I couldnt get it out of my head for the two days I was off work. So, part-time, no surprises, no new people is the thing that works for me.. Hope you get something, and, by the way, data-entry is a big part of my job - I find it relaxing and can focus on one thing - I dont mind it at all!! Good Luck Ginny ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted November 10, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 wow anwen, sounds ideal. i never thought about actually coming clean about it...wonder if anyone else's employers are as understanding as the government is? ginny, i was trying to train my self up to be a technician of some sort for the same reasons, i thought i'd train as a computer aided design operator for architects and engineers..however the trainings quite a slog and my heads not up for it right now. maybe i'll go for an intensive (expensive) course. keep em coming, this is a really interesting and helpful thread. tyhis is infor i couldnt get any other way apart from posting on this board. hurray for you!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RS8 Posted November 16, 2004 Report Share Posted November 16, 2004 I have had many many many jobs....my latest venture I decided to go back to school to get into the medical field somehow. I studied to do medical transcription. I did very well getting A's in classes that I would have hated in high school--all scientific like pathology etc. Then I started putting my application out. I eventually got hired as a secretary in a large University hospital. This job is very very busy. I don't get bored. I always have something to do and I can switch what I am doing many times in the day and still be working. Granted I have only been here for 6 months so far but I do have to say that it seems to be working out nicely for me. I do not have any patient contact other than talking to them on the phone. Anyhow, good luck finding a job that suits you. ~RS8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragdoll Posted November 17, 2004 Report Share Posted November 17, 2004 i think you can be and do what ever you want as long as you want it bad enough and put in the effort to find it. i told one of my employers in the health industry that i had a mental illness but it was under control. i slowly lost shifts as the months progressed. right now im in a fantastic commuinity nursing role and in the last 4 weeks have been very sick and needed time off. id work one week and get extremely depressed the next. so unwell to the point of hallucinating and i have no recollection of what went on. i didnt tell my boss then, i told her last week. but only said i suffered depression to the point of not being able to do anything. my boyfriend and my boss organised together, a carer for me for a few days so no one would worry about me being home alone. what boss would do something like that with out being discrimanotory?? im so happy im working wher ei am. her response has been so different. i still have my job and getting a lot of shifts. so i believe you can do anything you want if you really put your mind to it. good luck raggy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toonkate Posted November 22, 2004 Report Share Posted November 22, 2004 im struggleing on this one too! ive been nackwards and forwards in my mind as to what i want to do with my life. i took 3 years to complete a 2 year a-level course, changing subjects part way through, also wanted to change my gcse's. did two years of a biomedical sciences degree, dropped out to work full time at safeways cos at the time i loved it there. then i went back to uni to do an it and business course, and had to drop out of that as was getting really ill. my first shrink told me that i will never complete a uni corse and will never be able to stick to anything!! quite a lovely thing for her to have said to someone who has had it ingrained into their brain by their father all their life that "you have to get a good degree and good job" (i changed shrinks eventually!!) jobs - i have only had part time jobs as have always been in education, apart from the one year i took out. i have enjoyed them all and was good at them all, but was always made to feel like crap by managers etc (especially at safeways) now i havnt got a clue what i want to do, or if i will ever be capable of holding down a job at all. i have considered mental health nursing, psychology, IT, management, mid wifery, teaching, alsorts. but i cant stick to anything!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted November 22, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2004 so i got a job..in a call centre. and they made me fill out a questionaire about my health and give them my doctors name. i admitted that i had been to see him about depression..but i put i wasnt on medication even though i have been prescibed some...because i chose not to take it after feeling bad side effects. so we'll see if they fire me for being unsuitable happy for the post. i hate this shit, its gonna ruin my life isnt it..or whats left of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calyps Posted November 22, 2004 Report Share Posted November 22, 2004 Take heart Bored-a-line, The job i had before the one I have now (it was in, ironically, Life and Pensions) I put on my application form that I was seeing my dr and on antidepressants, which was true at that time. My new boss came to talk to me to tell me that she had been told about it and it was all fine, and she told me that if i was feeling that things weren't going too well, to talk to her about it. It kind of weirded me out at the time, but I was later to be grateful, when things kicked off for the worse and i had her in my corner. Best of luck to you, think positive! Anwen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktodee_27 Posted November 23, 2004 Report Share Posted November 23, 2004 I'm still trying with the job thing yet............. been applying for months and competition is hard in a college town! Trust me.............. I had my first job at 14 as a street trades salesperson selling papers door to door, it was more like a contest really, but I got paid for my profits. My second job was working at a grocery store from about the age of 15 to about 18 years old as a stocker, checker and bagger..... My third job was being a certified nursing assistant for about a year and a half in a nursing home until I had a breakdown and ended up in a hospital for my bpd and depression. I had on the job training for that one. Then, I came down to a group home after that, quit this job, and left everything behind....... since I couldn't take it anymore. And I was juggling technical school full time and going for liberal arts eventually wanting to transfer over to nursing, then this happened. I got As in my sleep the first semester, literally and being wasted on pharmies and cough syrup all the time, and coming in wasted and working with the elderly.......real swift. Then, in Whitewater where I'm at now, I have worked at a factory as a general laborer, the group home's sheltered workshop which makes didly squat, then, subway as a sandwhich artist, then, the workshop again, then a paper route which I did for someone i'd say for a month, then the workshop, then, a temp factory job which I did for only a day due to bpd circumstances, lol, then McDonalds for another year and a half in which i went on this huge pharmie relapse and had to quit since I couldn't get off of them, and then the workshop again, just doing odd jobs since there's no work to keep my med. insurance, and hoping that I someday get a job again, and go back to school and get my dog training degree and stay that way. It would be nice and now that i'm working w/ my therapist and getting actual concrete tx, and trying the techniques out actually instead of looking at the piece of paper and putting it in my ever expanding paper collection, it could just work out, let's hope. And yes, I know the feeling of discrimination very well and your upset bored. It's tough and I get down on myself for not getting a job at nights sometimes, so I definitely hear ya there. I'm on disability as of now, and yes, I don't work either so your not alone. (Let me add that I also have an assistant teaching degree I got through my high school coursework/internship class working with little children that I don't think I'll ever use anyways again. And I'm only 25 going on 26! ) But there is still always hope, I believe, even for my crappy track record so there is definitiely hope for you! (((((((((((bored)))))))) Well, cya later.............. May the force be with you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostsoul Posted November 23, 2004 Report Share Posted November 23, 2004 I am compelled to add to this list of horrors! Sweesee...I have been to three different universities. So HA! Beats your two! I bet someone out there's done four, five and even six! But that's probably boffins who actually ended up with degrees and MAs and PHDs at the end of it. Anyway, the first degree I did was Philosophy (where I met Bored). I only did about four months (that may even be optimistic) of this before dropping out. Still not sure why I did. Mumbled at the time about it not being the right subject for me, but actually in truth, it was pretty up my street...I was just having a breakdown. I spent the next two months flat out in bed with a 'mysterious' illness I had been getting for years which I now know is psychosomatic, partly. It is real, but my anxiety makes it a thousand times worse and in my mind I thought it was gonna kill me. So, not a good time. Then I retook A-Levels, and did well for having taught myself. I did ok the first time but found myself caught in a 'perfectionism' whereby I could have done better so by golly I would do better. (by golly?!). Then I went to 2nd University to do Psychology. The first degree had been about me being at odds with the nature of reality and my existence within it or at times without it! haha. This degree was about how I would deal with that reality and my existance, without it! Hahahaha. There is a kind of warped, weird, twisted sense there Erm, stayed two months longer in this university than the other, as a pot head. We would get back from lessons at 3pm and smoke till 3am, at which point I usually felt quite certain that i was going to miss class in the morning, which i often did. I fell behind a bit but was doing ok. Not loving the course. Then I got together with guy living next door to me, lost my virginity (yes, I was still a virgin at 19) and within three months I was pregnant. Spent the next month throwing up and in bed, missed all my lectures. Left university, but stayed with bloke. OOh this is getting long... Next degree was in English and Textile Design. Did a year of that! Wow! A whole year. Bad year though - socially hopless and alienated. Lots of suicide ideation and SH. Boo. Left after that year. The only jobs I have had are SHIT ONES! Market Researcher (basically getting told to piss off by general public whilst trying to get a 100 surveys done in the middle of winter). Office Junior (I hate ringing phones! I think I have PTSD from ringing phones in offices!). Deputy Manager of a shop that sold fairies, crystals, and other new age crap. It was a mecca for mad persons everywhere. Oh joy. Right now I'm trying to pass myself off as a massage therapist because Im ok at it and enjoy it and although my intellect is higher than it needs to be to be a massag therapist, basically, fuck it. Because I gotta do something my emotional inteligence can handle. My point if there is any, is that perhaps bpders may do better self-employed, so that they never have to answer to anyone else and they can carve out a niche they feel comfortable with. Gosh, I could have just wrote that. Anyways, good discussion... Claire ps good luck with your job bored xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted November 23, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 23, 2004 hey lostsoul, i beat your virginity record...so ha..and he didnt give a crap about me...so doubley lame and HA. jobs going ok considering. funny thing happened though which caught me by surprise. i found myself sucking up to this really supernice pretty ozzy girl, dont know what to make of it. its not a sexual thing, im not a lesbian, its more of a hope that if she likes me then i might become supernice and pretty. does anyone know what im talking about? its really weird. and creeping me out. do you think its creepy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted November 23, 2004 Report Share Posted November 23, 2004 me, I justabout got a teaching degree, dunno how still now, teaching practices were HELL. I taught infants fulltime for 4 years,having what I now see was a kind of breakdown for which I didn't get any help, at the middle of the 2nd year. The head wouldn't give me a reference for anything else other than supply teaching (and withe a teaching degree and no other experience there was little other option.) So I supply taught for 8 YEARS YEEECHHHH. Well, not every day, it had the bonus of being able to take time off without much question, I just 'wasn't available'... I taught in Inner London primary schools, all over the place, Deptford, Stepney....totally hell....just reliving my traumatic school days pver again (kids bullying me) I did LOADS of voluntary work in the East End... Then a year and a half ago I got a weekend library assistant job. I've been there since, with some weekday hours since August.. Mainly its really good but I'm really stressed out and down right now. (but then I haven't had a proper holiday in aeons) Since October I've been doing one shift a week as community mental health support worker, mainly sleepovers tho so it doesn't account for much. would enjoy it more if I did more and if I didn't feel like I ought to be on the receiving end there right now... that's my job story.. lorna Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swan Posted December 7, 2004 Report Share Posted December 7, 2004 I totally agree with lostsoul about being self employed - and everyone should go to Lorna's post under 'Recovery' to see the benefits of being an independent minded self motivated person (or a bolshy cow, depending on your point of view). I got sacked from every single job I started within 3 months (after crawling through a fine arts degree which I hated). But, I got lucky and had some help and encouragement to start again and qualify as a barrister - and it is the best - self employed, you tell everyone else what to do, you can work more or less when and how you want and most other barristers are as whacky as I am (my ex doctor has a nice line in treating lawyers). also very varied and you never have to see your clients again if you don't like them. Not easy or suitable for everyone, but I definitely second the suggestions about doing something where you will be in control and forget about 9 to 5 - it's a waste of a life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted December 13, 2004 Author Report Share Posted December 13, 2004 hi quick sub-question does anyone know a person with bpd who is a doctor, lawyer, architect, accountant, engineer or some other such "career ladder" type professions? cos i was pushed to be like that and im wondering if i ever could be? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swan Posted December 15, 2004 Report Share Posted December 15, 2004 hi quick sub-question does anyone know a person with bpd who is a doctor, lawyer, architect, accountant, engineer or some other such "career ladder" type professions? cos i was pushed to be like that and im wondering if i ever could be? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> You can be if you want to be. But no point trying to do something unless you want to - it doesn't work (I tried it so I know). But I'm a lawyer (see above) and although I've had to take some time out while the worst of this thing works itself out my career suits me (bpd and all) down to the ground - I couldn't be happier! lol, Swan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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