verbena Posted November 24, 2004 Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 I said "It is snowing for the first time today, and that is so emotional for me. I am at work and trying hard not to get so sad as I do when it snows. It's romantic and depressing to me. I left a message with my t and he called right back and we talked for a bit then he said to call again if I need to. It is so unsettling for me to hear him say that, like I don't even believe him because the last one explicitly forbid me from calling at all and refused to return calls or read letters. I feel like the other shoe hasn't dropped, and this one will pull the rug out from under me as soon as I begin to trust him." ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Then Lorna said"((((ver)))) Yes I like longfellows quote as well. Theres some truth in a lot of them huh? Im sorry the snow is making you feel low. I can see how you may be finding it hard to trust your new therapist. Maybe it would help to look at the reasons behind why your last one refused calls etc between sessions? That seems to be the general rule with those that use cbt/dbt as a guidline to there practise. To me its not allways the most usefull method. I am glad someone is there for you right now. Hope the snow stops soon. How about looking up some holidays on line and planning where you would like to go next?" (empatses on hot/beach/cocktails/ sun ) L xx And now I will say that I just want to be with all you guys, and wish so much I could come to the meet. I just want to be with these people who understand and feel as I do. I hate being at work and I hate being at home when I feel this way. Somebody called it BPDland or depression in BPDland. It is swallowing me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verbena Posted November 24, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 I think I'm back to two baths a day and trying to remember to eat a hot meal and trying to remind myself that "it" never fucking lasts long. Who was it (like tag) yesterday? Yesterday somebody was feeling so depressed, and I told them to be patient and the fucking pendulum would soon swing the other way. And then it swing back. :angry: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verbena Posted November 24, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 You know what else helps me? Two pumps of apple body splash. It's in my drawer at work, and it's distracting or somthing. Office mates hate it. But they hate everything I do/say. :angry: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bored-a-line Posted November 24, 2004 Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 me too, only place i wanna be. only people i trust are here. ((((verbena)))) lets just hang out here for a while whilst everything fucks up "outside" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flippy Posted November 24, 2004 Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 Im right here with you in bpdland and it sucks. ((((verbena)))) love flippy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verbena Posted November 24, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basketcase Posted November 25, 2004 Report Share Posted November 25, 2004 Am down and shite - same as everyone else here. Life is not worth the hassle. Even typing takes enormous effort. Can't sleep but am exhausted. So massively fed up with yet another fucking horrible day has just begun. Like in 28 Days DVD 'I'd rather be dreaming than living, living's just too hard to do' All I can say is you are not alone in this BPD swinging thang - one day great, another shite ... and so it goes on. Hope you swing back up soon. Hugs, SianX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verbena Posted November 25, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 25, 2004 Just had a pretty nice Thanksgiving with the in-laws. Lots of good food and fun visiting with the young ones (21-28). Eventually, though it is sensory overload, and I am on my way home to my bathtub and a vodka. See you all tomorrow. Thanks for visiting me (or joining me) in BPDland. XX Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cloudyfox Posted November 26, 2004 Report Share Posted November 26, 2004 (((verbena))) Glad you had a nice Thanksgiving and hope it helped you feel a little brighter about things. Cloudy x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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