I Will Be Done

[lostsoul]

my whole life

i have been someone

who has had to lurk

behind themselves

discreetly

ever since i was bullied

called gay and clever clogs

or teachers pet

the defences went up

and you could not see

what lay beneath.

who am i anyway?

what you want me to be

and if i can't do that

who do i become?

this i suppose, someone

you despise. oh you love me

as your daughter

but do not like me

as a person

and it hurts and hurts and hurts

and if i have to hear

how i could do so well

just one more time

i will know

that truly, as the sun rises

you do not know me at all