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I Achieved Something Today...


AllTheGoodNamesAreGone

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One of my favourite things is beating myself up about all the stuff I haven't done.

So just recently, I've started making a conscious effort to remind myself about the things that I actually HAVE done, however small and apparently unimportant - just to be a bit nicer to myself. I even try to write them down (and not beat myself up if I forget :lol:)

Today, I've done a load of washing. I have sorted out my arrangements for going out with friends at the weekend (instead of sitting home all miserable because the other half has a family do to which he hasn't invited me - not the appropriate occasion to meet them all for the first time if I'm realistic!). I've eaten well today instead of snacking on crisps and chocolate.

And finally, I am constantly telling myself that I HAVE started my recovery - just the tiny steps of admitting that I need help and having started to seek it (second session with counsellor tonight) are achievements. It took me 30-odd years to get this fucked up, so I should allow at least the same number of hours? (:lol:) days? weeks? months? (hopefully not years :wacko:) to get un-fucked up.

Go on... what have you achieved today?

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*I have managed to get through the day ok despite being exausted without being grumpy.

* I have sent of a few bits of work to potential publishers.

* I bought some new clothes. (I hate spending money on myself unless im manic)

*I have paid some bills before the red letters arrived lol

*I have bought the food needed to start my diet tommorow (special K and skimmed milk 3 times a day :lol: )

* I managed to get my son to eat veg for dinner.

*I am not feeling to freaked out despite being at home with just my son in bed.

*I went to work

*I dont hate myself today!

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I have achieved in the last few days being able to stop thinking about myself long enough to tell my husband in whispers all night long that I love him even though he fell asleep after telling him for the 4th time.

In recovery, I have achieved some responsibility and honesty - I didn't try to hide that I had prescriptions from two different doctors - it was more complicated than that, but the simple part was that I informed them both what the other was doing - not long ago I would have let them pile the pills on, just to see how they reacted with alcohol.

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I have

- opened up more feelings in therapy

-gone to the bank and stood in the queue (have been putting this off a week)

-delivered the cheque for group this term to college

-been to sainsbury's

-not stayed curled up under the blanket this afternoon

lorna

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