Compulsive Lying, Is It A Disorder?

[Voltielli]

Hi Everyone.

I have recently become aware that I lie a great deal. As well as the usaul stuff that I think everyone lies about, sex life, grades etc I seem to be lying about ridiculous things for no apprent reason. Soemthimes I do it to be entertainig or exagerate a story so it seems more fun. But sometimes they are things whcih no once could care less about and yet I still ie about it. Half the time I don't even plan to do it, a lie just comes out of my mouth. It is almost like I am addicted to lying! I know that this sounds ridiculous and there are people out there with serious problems but having looked into it slightly I have found no real information about wheter it is actually a menta lhealth issue or just something I need to try and stop.

It has starting effecting my lfie now and I am finding it harder and harder to keep tratc of the lies I have told.

I'd appreciate any advice or info anyone has on the subject.

[drew]

Compulsive lying is a common disorder often caused by low self-esteem and a need for attention. Often, the liar does not realize how often he or she is lying because it becomes second nature or habit (indeed, it is often referred to as habitual lying).

Compulsive lying alienates friends and loved ones and often brings about the opposite of what the liar wants: instead of getting the attention they often crave, they end up pushing people away. With therapy, many people can overcome their compulsion to lie and salvage their interpersonal relationships before it is too late.

found this off a nother site health diaries

[yorkiegal73]

Hi,

I used to be the same, especially in my teens and early twenties. I think it was because I wanted to fit in, and didn't feel I had anything interesting to offer. I also didn't want people to know the truth about how I really felt, so a lie was always better. I couldn't even ring in sick for work without turning a simple excuse into a complete exaggeration. I was found out so many times but would never admit to the lie. I really think it's down to low self esteem coupled with, in my case, aversion to boredom. When I started group therapy I made a conscious decision not to tell any lies at all, however tiny. It was really important to me. I'm still doing that and nearly every day it's on the tip of my tongue to tell an outrageous story but I stop myself. I don't think it's a disease in itself but a symptom of one. Remember too that many of us with PDs have grown up in environments based on lies. I had to keep a lot of secrets as a small child so it's not surprising I didn't learn that lying was wrong.

[NickyP]

compulsive lying can be a symptom of antisocial behavioural disorder. it can also as drew says be a sign of low self esteem and a need for attention, thinknig that your life isnt interesting so you jazz it up to make you look more exciting.

at least you can admit to it though as see it as a problem, many can't.

a question..not meant to be persecutory in any way.. can we expect that you will tell the truth here?

[Marchmadness]

Hey -

Maybe you can look inside yourself and try to find out when this started. Work with

a therapist and see what you are covering up or lacking in. Gonna take some hard

work, but in the long run you will feel better about things.

Marchmadness

[Voltielli]

Hi again, well firstly thanks everybody for some great advice and information. It's been helpfull. Secondly with response to the comment about whter I will tell the truth, I promise I will try. I think it should be easier than in my day to day life becasue I can detach a forum from the 'real world'. If ever I do tell I lie on here I will make sure I either remove it or post soemthing to let everyone know it was a lie. Thanks again.

P.S, I am on here, well aware that you all know I've admitted to being a liar, it's the whole reason I'm here, if you ever want call me on something I will understand.

[NickyP]

hey Volt, i'm sure no one here will ever want to call you something.

Re not lying on here, i find it a lot easier to be open and honest in cyberland than in my offline world :)

[Marchmadness]

Hey -

Maybe the more honest you can be with us, the more you will be

honest with others. Use us as a practice tool to learn how to be

honest.

March

[InnerPeace]

Maybe it would help to find out why you lie. How does it feel when you tell lies?

[pain-dance]

Hi Everyone.

I have recently become aware that I lie a great deal. As well as the usaul stuff that I think everyone lies about, sex life, grades etc I seem to be lying about ridiculous things for no apprent reason. Soemthimes I do it to be entertainig or exagerate a story so it seems more fun. But sometimes they are things whcih no once could care less about and yet I still ie about it. Half the time I don't even plan to do it, a lie just comes out of my mouth. It is almost like I am addicted to lying! I know that this sounds ridiculous and there are people out there with serious problems but having looked into it slightly I have found no real information about wheter it is actually a menta lhealth issue or just something I need to try and stop.

It has starting effecting my lfie now and I am finding it harder and harder to keep tratc of the lies I have told.

I'd appreciate any advice or info anyone has on the subject.

Compulsive lying is not a disorder in itself: it is one of the possible symptoms of most personality disorders (as well as some learning disabilities). I've done it myself in the past and you're right, it's hard to keep track of them. As someone suggested previously, it is a form of attention-seeking brought on by low self-esteem and, perhaps, identity confusion. Maybe you should just "zip it" over the coming months and let the dust settle: then try to make a fresh start. If the lies come back to haunt you, just tell people it's a part of your illness and, hey, sorry for any inconvenience caused. It's not as if you've killed anyone, is it? Don't indulge in a guilt-trip unless you've done something serious.