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Hi, Not Sure What I'm Doing Here


squirrelpoo

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Hi

I've just joined today.

I'm 44 been depressed on and off since 13. Feeling really stressed and anxious at the moment.

Self employed, internet and shop and it's turning to s**t. single parent 2 young children and I'm sinking under loads of debt and worrying and worrying.

some of the debts are insured - mortgage and business loan but I'm not sure if they're covering me or not yet and the shop is shut a lot of the time so no money coming in. Doctor's signed me off agian - not that that's much use when you're self=employed.

Tight in the middle of my chest and feeling completely tense and like I need a good kick up the backside.

Suicide is not an option anymore because of the kids.

Completely lost and don;t know what to do for the best.

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First of all, welcome!

*hugs you*

I am so sorry that you are under all of this pressure and worry! It is encouraging to see that you are fighting it all for your kids and I hope you can keep that desire to fight for things to get better!

Sorry for not really having any great advice. You should be able to find people here who can relate to your situation better than I :blush:

Take care x

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that desire to fight for things to get better!

Thanks Carole, I must admit I hadn't thought of it as trying to make things better - I just feel like I have to just get through until they're old enough to look after themselves.

Trouble is I suppose i always thought I'd be dead by the time i was 31. I haven't got a picture of what it should be like past that age.

I'm confused - I think

thanks again

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Hi

I've just joined today.

I'm 44 been depressed on and off since 13. Feeling really stressed and anxious at the moment.

Self employed, internet and shop and it's turning to s**t. single parent 2 young children and I'm sinking under loads of debt and worrying and worrying.

some of the debts are insured - mortgage and business loan but I'm not sure if they're covering me or not yet and the shop is shut a lot of the time so no money coming in. Doctor's signed me off agian - not that that's much use when you're self=employed.

Tight in the middle of my chest and feeling completely tense and like I need a good kick up the backside.

Suicide is not an option anymore because of the kids.

Completely lost and don;t know what to do for the best.

I was in a similar position about 3 years ago. Like you I also had kids to worry about. Professional help from mental health services got me out of it. They were even able to help with the financial problems which seemed insummountable at the time. Give them a chance. I didn't expect much from them at the time, but looking back I can now see that it was the best thing to do. Now things are back on track and I no longer worry about debts. I still have schizophrenia, but I am learning to cope with that as well. Don't give up. Beishek

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Welcome to the group, you are sure to find lots of support here.

I hope you are having a better day today.

Take good care of yourself.

Fairy xxx

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:)

Hi Squirrel, welcome to a great site.

I am the same age as you but don't have any kids, i do however have a huge amount of personal debt due to the loss of my job 2 years ago.

I would certainly advise you to go and see someone at your local Citizens Advice, as they are fantastic with debt problems and will be able to give you lots of advice regarding your business and personal debts. They will help you to sort out the money side of things at least.

Also the mental health charity MIND is fantastic for helping with practical issues, benefits and of course emotional support too. You can find your nearest one in the phone book.

This site is great for making friends and for help, advice and support also.

I hope the stress will ease for you soon. I know how it feels to be drowning in debt!

Take care of yourself.

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Thank you for the kind welcome.

I've tried phoning CAB but never get through. One day I rang and they had a time at the council offices that day but I just got in a mad panic.

Yesterday I went to Tesco and couldn't get out of the car. I think it was an anxiety attack.

The last hours have been spent trying not to cut myself. I'm watching Sweeny Todd at the mo. LOL

nutter.

I can't wait til this life is over. sorry but that's how I feel at the moment.

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Welcome to the site

sorry you are feeling so down at the moment. Rethink has an advice service that might be able to give you some input on all the financial worries.

I hope you find this site supportive and we can get you through this bad patch.

hugs

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Hi squirrel I am in a similar boat as you at the moment... finances bleurgh!

Just wanted to welcome you here. I am sorry you are having it rough at present. Hopefully things can be sorted out for you in some way and that things improve. In the meantime, post away and we will be listening.

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Well, you must already be stuffed full with all these welcomes! Heh, but I thought I would give you one too :) So welcome 8)

I also wanted to say that, I think that how you find your strength in your children is a fantastic thing and I hope you never let that go. Keep safe angel, and lay off the sweeny todd haha :)

Peace, Lance

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hi squirrel

welcome to the site.

The C.A.B sorted all my financial problems out last year. I left a message on their answerphone mentioning i had mental health problems and they gave me an appointment really quickly. They stopped me getting evicted and sorted out repayment plans with all my debtors. They didn't judge at all. I just took in months worth of mail and left them to deal with it. And they wrote to me a month later to check everything was ok.

I really hope you can manage to go see them. It will be such a relief once you've done it I promise.

take care

sam

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Thank you everyone. Still haven't been able to get hold of the CAB and theier machine doesn't take messages. I'll have a look into Mind. Thanks

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Hi there and welcome.

Sorry to hear the pressure you are under right now.

I am also a single parent with 2 children and that alone can be very hard work.

Keep posting and we are here to support you.

Take care xx

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  • 5 months later...

Hi people

An update. Still alive.

i got an appointment with cab in october and have another one with them next week. The shop is effectively shut. I had a severe episode and ended up in hospital and the children stayed over at the childminders. social services were contacted i saw a psychiatrist

i'm getting some support so it feels like i don't have to do it all by myself.

my psychotherapist i've seen twice and i think there may be somethign good to come out of it. I'm still not convinced there's any point to life but I have to go through the motions for the girls' sake. i hope to be able to feel happy once this is all over.

Currently my sleeping's all out of whack, averaging going to bed around 2 - 4 am take kids to school then go back to bed for an hour or 2. not quite burying my head in the sand but not far off.

how do you know if you're actually ill or whether you're just being lazy? i can be high functioning, when i don't take my meds for a few days i'm buzzing and do loads of things at the same time.the house got a really good tidy up but then i crash and get all teary so i have to carry on taking the tablets again.

ho hum

anyway, seriously am i just being lazy or am i ill? how can a person tell?

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anyway, seriously am i just being lazy or am i ill? how can a person tell?

Oh my goodness, i have been saying that for a year

still not sure

but it sounds like mh illness to me

it is easier to be understanding towards others, than ourselves

xx

there is a point, lots of points, but i am not sure if any of them are mine atm

your children

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hey, sorry that you been having a rough time but im glad you are getting some support. i hope that your psychotherapist can help you and theres always a point and im glad you have your kids to keep going for.

you dont sound lazy to me, i often wonder that with myself but it does sound like mh problems especially if the tablets are helping and i think its a problem of bpd and other mh issues with thinking its just you being lazy or wrong or whatever but i dont think you are either of those.

xxx

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