pandaprincess Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 "I wear black on the outside, because black is how I feel on the inside. And if I seem a little strange, then that's because I am..." Hello. My name is Missy, and I just got diagnosed with BPD before Christmas. It's taken them nearly ten years to work it out, and all that time I was terrified that I was going crazy, and that I was the only one. I've seen countless different professionals and none of them seem to know anything about it. So I decided to do a search. I had no idea that there would be so much information. I've read through so much recently that my head is swimming with it all. I was devistated to discover what a common disorder it is, and that so many people are trying to live with it, and learn from it. I thought I was completely alone. It's so difficult coming to terms with the diagnosis. I've read up on it, and it doesn't paint a very nice picture. But at least I can understand why my head is in such a mess. The mood swings are the worst, and then there's not being able to regulate emotions or identify a single clear feeling. But it seems apparent to me that many BPD's are intellegent and articulate people, with a natural predisposition for creativity. That's something that I've been able to identify with. painting is one of the few things I have left, that makes me feel truely alive. I hope I'll be able to fit in here. BPD has cost me everything: especially in the last few years. I've lost mostly everybody I ever cared about, and the handful of friends that I had before my last breakdown, have decided to withdraw. I dont blame them. It must be difficult to cope with a person who seems to have a stranger in their head, and can alternate between being quite pleasant and amiable, one minute, to being quiet and suspicious, the next. I feel sure that if anybody is ever going to understand the rollercoaster, then it's those people that are also on it... ...and yes, I have a panda fixation :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calyps Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 Welcome ye Princess of Pandas! Why wouldn't you fit in here? We are all people just trying to get by in this crazy world after all! I don't know you so this is really presumptuous- I would definately recommend you DO NOT cut yourself off from friends- it's hard, you have to do a lot of communication but true friends who love you want to help you manage this illness this better, the kind of help we could all use! lecture over, hope to be reading more from you soon, Anwen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
star Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 Hi pandaprincess, looking forward to reading your posts and getting to know you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 Hi Missy aka Pandaprincess!!!!! I'm sure you'll fit in here...we are a creative, intelligent articulate bunch who care lots about each other. Some of us have BPD, some have other things like PTSD, Depression, Bipolar. (and I'm not formally diagnosed anything...although I have a bit of evrything mostly, mainly the BPD!) Welcome, and make yourself at home here. karie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mycroft Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 Hi pandaprincess, welcom. Hope you find some support and answers here. Everyone is really helpful and kind. In the meantime here's a present.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandaprincess Posted February 21, 2005 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 I didn't expect anybody to reply. It's nice to get a response so quickly. I've been having a good nose around, and I think I like it in here PANDAS!!!! Thanx for the KISS pandas :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raich Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 We all feel alone sometimes... the good thing about knowing what you have is beening able to try and rationalise feelings you are having, and instead off feeling completely insane, being able to give a reason to the feelings you are feeling... My husband has bi-polar, and is a acoholic, I often feel alone and fight against a brick wall. I only have one real friend, she is also my sister in law. Most off my friends found me too much too handle. I have only just found bpdworld, but all ready feel secure and among people who understand me... now you have found us, you will not feel alone anymore, we all struggle here together!! Raich, xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyMacbeth Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 Welcome Panda Princess, You came to the right place...you will fit in here! Glad you found us. LM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
//Nat\\ Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 Welcome and I hope u make sense of ure BPD - everyone here is lovely and i hope u settle in fast xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracey Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 :welcomeani: Missy aka Panda princess hope you find us all friendly and supportive make yourself at home and hope to see you around take care Traceyxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paula Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 hi :welcomeani: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alexa Posted February 21, 2005 Report Share Posted February 21, 2005 Hey Panda I'm a princess too lol :welcomeani: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandaprincess Posted February 22, 2005 Author Report Share Posted February 22, 2005 Thankyou all for making me feel welcome. I think I've fianally found a sanctuary. I'm looking forward to getting to know you people. I think we all have something to offer one another. Unconditional support, and understanding... and pandas! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul Posted February 22, 2005 Report Share Posted February 22, 2005 Welcome - I hope you find it useful here, I know I have :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MargaretB Posted February 22, 2005 Report Share Posted February 22, 2005 Hi Missy, We're all here for you. See you around, Love, Magsie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinklady66 Posted February 22, 2005 Report Share Posted February 22, 2005 :) Welcome Panda... :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flowergirl Posted February 23, 2005 Report Share Posted February 23, 2005 welcome Missy Hope to get to know you soon Take care Flower x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostsoul Posted February 23, 2005 Report Share Posted February 23, 2005 hi pandaprincess! :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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