S1CKK Posted April 3, 2009 Report Share Posted April 3, 2009 I just stopped taking all my meds because I was having horrible paradox reactions to al of them. However they did take away my depression and replaced it with far worse panic attacks....made me sui again.So, now I'm off it and my mood has been going downhill ever since and today I'm finally feeling as miserable as I did before the treatment.I don't want the sun to rise again. I'm really sensitive to light. I want eternal darkness! I want my razors back!!! I'm sorry but I had to put that somewhere. I'm sorry I'm miserable and at the same time, feeling miserable makes me happy.At least it's something..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tulip Posted April 3, 2009 Report Share Posted April 3, 2009 Hey Sickk,Your not supposed to just stop taking meds,you have to be weaned off them,This is why your getting these horrible thoughts,how long ago did you stop taking your meds?Tulip xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S1CKK Posted April 3, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2009 Do you think I'm stupid???! I did wean myself off them!!! I consulted with pdoc about all this. I'm not taking any meds at the moment cos all of them (and I've been on a lot), only made me so much worse.....but how would you know?! You're a newbie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tulip Posted April 3, 2009 Report Share Posted April 3, 2009 Forgive me for trying to help,I'm sorry,You trying to say cos i'm a newbie i can't answer posts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S1CKK Posted April 3, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2009 No don't worry about it....I apprecitate you trying to help! I'm not in a good mood right now.I'm just saying, if you had been on here longer you'd know my history. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ocean Wolf Posted April 3, 2009 Report Share Posted April 3, 2009 I got paradox reactions too and it took awhile before I could get a hold of myself again. Did you feel like this before you started taking the meds? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quiteemma Posted April 3, 2009 Report Share Posted April 3, 2009 hey sickk i never been on this, so not sure of the side effects. but im here if you wanna talk i'll do what i can to help yousending lots of *hugs* to you p.m me if you wanna Take care Em xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S1CKK Posted April 4, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2009 I just seem to be spiraling downwards again. My mood isn't so bad yet but my thoughts are! I get thoughts like: hey I got like 300 tabs in my drawer...luckily that's where the thoughts stop. It's more like a statement. I hate having thoughts like this.Another thought that I got was...first thing I'm gonna do when I move in my new appartment: Buy a nice heart shaped box...found it already, put my razors in it, put it in the bathroom....I'm so sorry I'm doing this to me. I have no reason to be like this! Oh god, now I'm even apologizing to myself; how pathetic. I know I don't have to apologize to anyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ocean Wolf Posted April 6, 2009 Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 It's alright to apologise to yourself. You told me you were going into treatment? When is that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S1CKK Posted April 6, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 like autumn, oh wait that's fall right ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ocean Wolf Posted April 6, 2009 Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 Fall and autumn are the same season, so yeah. Do you think you'll be able to hold on until then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted April 6, 2009 Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 If you are starting to feel significantly worse then perhaps you should check with your pdoc? I'm here if you need to talk. xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S1CKK Posted April 6, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 ty no I don't feel worse. I'm on an ok level at the moment....I just need my vicodin , NOT! No seriously, it's managable at the moment and once uni starts again I won't have so much time thinking about myself. Work always helps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted April 6, 2009 Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 I'm glad that you're moods are even and I agree once Uni starts again it's be a good distraction for you. Hugs xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ocean Wolf Posted April 6, 2009 Report Share Posted April 6, 2009 Someone watches House... :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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