Do Older People Know More Than Younger People?

[Sammy]

I find so often that people that are say twice my age, make no end of assumptions about me. They assume that because they are older they know more about life.

Yet most the people that I have met that are older than me (which there have been many), know much less than me which is clear by their words, ignorance, arrogance and behaviour.

I personally have been through more than a lifetime of unique experiences in just my 31 years of life. I have wronged and been wronged. I have learnt so much in my lifetime about people, life and myself. I have become self aware, mindful and learnt not to judge people before I know them and all the circumstances. I have learnt that for the majority of the time not to make assumptions but to ask questions. I've learnt to lower my expectations upon others and set realistic ones of myself.

In fact I know and have learned more than most of the people older than myself that I have met and talked to, not to mention having more real life experience than them too.

I hate that people older than me patronise me and try to preach to me what I already know and learned a long time ago based on their own assumptions and ignorance of me.

Rather than tell me I don't know something, why not try asking me what I know? Maybe I'll surprise you. But then I find older people also don't like that someone younger than them might actually have more answers than them.

There are some older people that have challenged the way I think on occasions, so I am in no way putting all older people in a box, just some of those that I have had dealings with. But then just as some older people challenge the way I think, so do some younger people too.

In fact I believe I have been lucky throughout my life to meet people that challenge my way of thinking and encourage me to view each circumstance from a different perspective(s).

Anyway I hate people being judgmental of me and making assumptions about me. But despite this, I don't need their validation because inside I know the truth, and really I can just laugh at them.

[Marchmadness]

Sammy -

How old are we talking here, like before they start to lose their minds? My father is 80,

and he thinks he knows everything and how things should be done. In other words, his

way or no way. The world is not like that black- white! There are so many factors that

come in to play with people. How they were as a child until adulthood, and how they

themselves learned how to deal with issues.

When I was working as a teacher, I worked with kids and special needs. My kids would

come and visit me in class and they knew my students. Having them come in and seeing

other kids their age with disabilities helped them understand that not everyone is the

same. They have more of a real look how life is. Same when it comes to MH issues, my

kids know about mine, I didnt find out about my fathers until after my mom died. Heard

from my aunt.

With age does come a certain amount of wisdom, and life is always changing, we have

to learn to go with the changes and not totally fight them. Count yourself lucky, one of

the adults who can see that we are all different and accept those differences. As you know

Sammy, I am older then you, do I think I know it all, hell no! Kind of think as long as

we keep learning from life, we are going to be better for it. Can not do anything about how

others think or feel, but as long as you are true to you and know who you are, that is

all that really matters.

Man don't really know if I was able to articulate what is in my head, just hope that I was

able to convey that just because they are old doesnt mean they have all the answers.

March

[catspiracy]

You're right, it's about an attitude of openness even more so than age. At the same time, age does bring a unique kind of perspective. You've had time to see an entire cycle of life work through. You've maybe seen someone grow up from a fetus to a grandmother. That's a breadth of perspective that younger people can't possibly have. So I think it's a mix, and neither the elderly nor the youthful ought to be arrogant or complacent.

And I love reading you say that you are self-validating now. That is Powerful!

Peace,

cat

[Data]

Age is not necessarily he same as wisdom. Some people are naturally wiser than others I think, some people have lived more. Some people listen more.

However there can be a link between age and wisdom.

In the last 15 years I have discovered so much. Sometimes it annoys me when someone is only 21 and they think that they know a lot about life, when they clearly do not. I did not know a lot at that age! However I just put it down to the immaturity of youth.

For example, I sometimes find it invalidating when I share here the things that I have discovered about myself, and people make huge contradictions. I know that they are just trying to be nice but they do not succeed. I have spent years in therapy, talking to people, thinking about my problems. And, I am not an idiot!

[Sammy]

Yeah I got it, I think it was articulated very well. Of course I accept that I will know more than I know now when I am older as I will gain even more experience by then. That does not mean that someone else that is older knows more than me. I also feel those from other generations may have led more sheltered lives (in some cases), or things were viewed differently then, new discoveries or ways of dealing with things have happened since 'their' time. Because of that many might just be behind the times and unaware of progressive thinking, self awareness and discovery etc...

Others think materialistic goals are the be all and end all of life and look at me with very little materialistically, with my modest little car, my low income, my small house and make assumptions that I am not successful, am failing or lack education or knowledge. They assume that materialstic things are my goals and I'm a non achiever. But my goals are more than materialism. Materialistic luxuries would just be a bonus in my life. I strive for health, well being, contentment, love, family all of which I'm either achieving or close to achieving.

I would like to be more spiritualistic with regards to being at one with nature/universe, meditation, rituals etc..but so far too lazy for that. But I'll also hold my hand up to my failings.

I know what I do wrong, where I don't achieve my full potential and the areas I need to work on. The thing is I know the answers but sometimes feel to lazy or unmotivated to use them.

I do feel there is little I can be taught anymore about life or people or myself. I feel the main area where there is potential to increase my knowledge is academically.

[Data]

I do feel there is little I can be taught anymore about life or people or myself.

I know you won't like this, and it is not meant to be a criticism, but I think you are very wrong here Sammy.

But don't believe me, make a mental note of this statement and ask yourself whether it was right in 20 years .

[catspiracy]

Sammy, I think you'd really enjoy listening to the late Alan Watts. (that is, if you have a long attention span...he sounds at first kind of droning, but if you pay attention, you will discover his wit and compassion for the student of meditation.)

For example, his lecture on the common question, "How do I do meditation?"...his answer? That's the wrong question, instead you should ask "What is meditation?" And his answer: being open and present to the Universe. So each person has their own "How": it's whatever gives you Flow. That's how you meditate! You ENJOY LIFE in a state of Flow. As far as being one with the Universe, he tells a hilarious anecdote about a monk whose answer to planning life was "you do not plan fart. Fart just happen!"

I think it rocks that you give the finger to status symbols. All that's dinosaur shit. Conspicuous consumption is so out-dated! That Hierophant is desperately clinging to existence. ; )

oh, to listen to alan watts, go to http://archive.kpfk.org/parchive/ and scroll slowly until you see his name in the left hand column. He's on Sunday mornings. Also, sometimes you'll find longer talks of his on the "Roy of Hollywood" show, so if you notice that show, read the list of programs to find Alan Watts. That show has tons of amazing spiritual programming. Although its host drones TERRIBLY!!!!!! I like fast forwarding thru the host's monologues and get to the content.

I find it much easier to listen to this kind of stuff than to read it. I actually turn on some electronica behind the talking to keep my attention. I listen to this stuff while I do my artwork.

dammit i've hijacked.

love

cat

[Sammy]

When I say people, I'm talking people in general not individuals I might meet. Obviously you have to get to know someone as an individual and find their motivations etc..

What I mean is that I understand people in general, various motivations etc....but no I am not psychic, I can't look at an individual and say *bam* that's it I know you! I have to talk to them first and get to know them and ask questions. But I've yet to find someone who has motivations or thought processes or issues I've never come across before. This isn't even to say I can solve every problem someone else has, just my own if I think before I act. Because where one way of dealing with something might be right for one person it might not for another. But where I would like to help guide people towards their own answers, i don't have any desire to solve their problems for them.

I pretty much have life sussed out now, if only I can remember all this every day even when faced with immediate difficulties and keep my head on my shoulders and take those moments I need to take the right course of action rather than act impulsively.

[Sammy]

Hijack welcome!

you do not plan fart. Fart just happen!" - thinking of putting that in my signature, it's very me! lol

[Sammy]

Oh and I need to get over my gullibility regarding sarcasm. I'm not good at that one. More so online where no tone of voice or body language is noticable.

[catspiracy]

hehe my friend Renee and I always say it to each other now ; )

[catspiracy]

What meme said is actually really interesting, and probably true about 20 years later. A lot happens in 20 years! I was 19 twenty years ago, holy shit!I thought I knew everything. And a couple of years ago, I thought I knew everything, too. Then the Burning Man community blew my mind.

I got some more insight on the Fool this weekend, too. My friend A. is definitely a Fool. People exist in these bubbles of their world views, like sheep on a pasture, kind of. And then along comes the Fool, and says "I'm going to cross that river on my hands!"

Now, some of the people never knew there WAS a river, they were so busy in their own little pasture to even look. Some of the people knew there was a river, but had convinced themselves it was never to be crossed. Some people knew there was a a river, and thought about crossing, but c'mon, on your hands???

After the Fool does it, suddenly there are a bunch of idiots crossing rivers on their hands, because they missed the point. A good number of naysayers are angry and full of hate toward the Fool for giving them unwelcome cognitive dissonance.

But a number of people are glad for the Fool's influence, for he put the bug in their ear, the notion to start building an amazing river-spanning contraption that will transform life for everyone!

Old and young, we run across Fools who grace us with sudden feats of intuition.

[Sammy]

Wow, when I had my tarot reading done, I didn't see how accurate it was, some of it I thought really? Is that me. Today it is like something changed, a door opened and my eyes were opened. (not that I learnt anything new, more that all the fragments I already knew fitted themselves together to form one whole clear picture)

So I just reread that tarot reading from last week and wow, isn't it so funny how everything I've just said here and in my other thread, which I'm applying to my life now, is exactly as the cards said and predicted?

[AndyL]

All I know is if I knew what I know now in my 20s and 30s, I'd be much better off altogether. Experience, time on this earth, count for a lot. If someone in their 20s came up to me and asked, how do you navigate a mid-life crisis (like they'd care, which almost makes my case right there), I doubt I could enlighten them. I know what it's about, so I know more than they do on that issue, but you have to experience that particular little episode yourself to really know what it is. Life is all about choice; the more information you have, the better informed your choices are. I have a lot more information now than I did then.

On the other hand, my 16-year old son knows a helluva lot more than I do about science and movie criticism. But I still drive a car better than he does (at least for now). Guess it depends.

[catspiracy]

(not that I learnt anything new, more that all the fragments I already knew fitted themselves together to form one whole clear picture)

The whole is greater than the sum of its parts. You've just described the wisdom of age (for those that choose to grow wise as they grow in age). You've seen sooooo many trees that finally Forest has a full meaning to you. "Forest" is "new" if all you knew before was "Tree".

that process never stops.

Those cards are a Great Mystery to me. I am humbled by them every time.

Namaste, my dear!

love,

cat

[Ocean Wolf]

In the last 15 years I have discovered so much. Sometimes it annoys me when someone is only 21 and they think that they know a lot about life, when they clearly do not. I did not know a lot at that age! However I just put it down to the immaturity of youth.

Meme, that hurts. Maybe you are referring to another 21 year old who think they know a lot about life. Maybe you don't realize that just because you did not know a lot at that age, doesn't mean others don't. Maybe you don't realize that "putting it down to the immaturity of youth" is making assumptions. You have told me before you hate when people do it to you. Why do you do it to others then?

I admit, I hate it too when some university student who is my age or a bit older who has still not moved out of their parents house or made a life of their own thinks that they know so much about life. But it's not the age, it's the lack of experience.

I know someone who is a little bit older than me who is the only child of two lawyers. He still has temper tantrums. Really, the temper tantrums most people grow out of when they are little.

I know someone a few years older than me who thinks he is so old and he assumes, because he is older, that he knows more than me. He still relies on his parents, can't hold down a job, and arguing with him is like banging your head against a wall because his arguments are along the lines of... well, for example, "You can't say anything about Napoleon because you're not French" (he's not either. He's quebecois).

My dad is in his early fifties and is also mentally ill (most likely BPD, but he doesn't say). I have accomplished more in that area by the age of 20 than he has by the age of 50.

Someone I worked with told me about how I'm oh-so-young (don't know how old she was, but maybe in her thirties or forties?). She was argumentative over the stupidest things (I'm keeping to myself too much, so I must have a problem with her), she was rude, and she would skip shifts. At least once, she had her mom call in for her (keep in mind, this is a grown woman). She lectured me on the fact that I was walking home at night when the surrounding neighbourhood includes motels with hookers, homeless people, and addicts. It's not even that bad of a neighbourhood, I am armed (it's legal and just used for defense), and I have never had a problem with anyone attacking me in that manner (that includes in the real bad neighbourhoods when I was homeless). Did she bother asking? No. She just assumed I was walking because I had no idea.

Not to mention, I have a theory about why they won't bother me. It's the same theory to explain certain weird behaviors towards me. For example, a stranger (a man probably about the same age as my dad) once came up to me and asked if I have any "wisdom." I said no because... well, I was just twenty, but he told me the situation and asked for advice anyway.

I think age is just a number. While more time means more opportunities to experience things, that doesn't necessarily mean they do.

Although if I ever stop learning, I think I might as well be dead.

[Roses]

I haven't read all the posts as I'm not well. Just wanted to say -

Age does not equal wisdom.

Intelligence does not equal being clever.

I don't think you can ever know it all and there is always something to learn. Sometimes that lesson is humility.

Love to you all xxxxx

[Sammy]

So ur purpose to life is to learn wolf? Without learning there is no purpose?

[Data]

Meme, that hurts. Maybe you are referring to another 21 year old who think they know a lot about life.

Ocean, I was not talking about you specifially and I did not mean to cause offence.

Maybe you don't realize that "putting it down to the immaturity of youth" is making assumptions. You have told me before you hate when people do it to you. Why do you do it to others then?

Yes you are right. But I could put them thinking (that they know more about life than me) down to them assuming I am stupid. I think my assumption is more charitable.

While more time means more opportunities to experience things, that doesn't necessarily mean they do.

Yes but if you have experienced things and someone who hasn't is trying to lecture you, that is annoying.

Although if I ever stop learning, I think I might as well be dead.

Definitely I think that also. I will always learn about myself, life, people.

[Ocean Wolf]

Oh! I get it now, meme. Thank you for clarifying. Yes, I hate that too.

Sammy, I don't understand what a purpose is. But the reason I say I might as well be dead is because... Well, for one, I can't imagine not learning. Also, life is always changing right? So there's always new things to learn. Will it still be living if things stop changing?

[Sammy]

Things can still change without us learning, for example some change is predictable, it still moves forwards, turns and twists, but we expect it so therfore do not learn by it.

I too can't imagine never learning anything new, but for me it is about spiritual stuff now and academic stuff. And I don't have enough time in this lifetime to learn all the academic and spiritual stuff. I'd like to know about all religions in detail and history and geography and law and philosophy etc... So yes there will always be things to learn.

But if we were immortal, there would come a day we knew it all, and I don't believe that would mean no purpose to live anymore. I think then we would just have to enjoy each day for what it was, predictabilty and all. Although even then the odd natural disaster or unpredictable thing would come along, but that doesn't mean we'd learn from it because we'd have been through it all many times before. So yeah you can still have excitment, impulsivity, change without anything to learn.

[successful_workthru]

I think its about experience, and not age.

You can get young people who are wise due to their life experiences, just as you can get older people who are naiive and who have lived a sheltered life.

You get some cocky young people who think they know it all, but they learn as they get older, and wiser.

You also get some older people who know fuck all, but who patronize the young, because they feel small and want to bolster their image.

just my opinion though.

I class myself as middle aged and learning.

[Sammy]

See I guess I could make a topic about cocky young people, but...to be honest they don't bother me because they just little twerps who I don't actually think they really believe their own tripe. Older people 'seem' to genuinely believe theirs, but maybe they've just had more practice.

[Roses]

Over the years I learnt that it is far better for me to spend time worrying about my self and my family/friends than the attitudes and opinions of people who really don't matter. It is amazing the feeling when you let go of all of that stuff.

[Ocean Wolf]

But if we were immortal, there would come a day we knew it all, and I don't believe that would mean no purpose to live anymore. I think then we would just have to enjoy each day for what it was, predictabilty and all. Although even then the odd natural disaster or unpredictable thing would come along, but that doesn't mean we'd learn from it because we'd have been through it all many times before. So yeah you can still have excitment, impulsivity, change without anything to learn.

I think even immortal people would never learn it all unless everything (and I mean everything) becomes predictable. There are still experiences that may happen and I think an immortal person would still change over time (unless they're greek gods, those are pretty static). Then they would still have to learn about new aspects of themselves. Not to mention watching evolution and having new organisms to learn about. Or changes in human societies creating new cultures.