benji Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 I was convinced i was getting better but last night was crap, i was sure i had done some thing real bad was sweating and shaking all night, took 3 extra pills but they did fa , kow i am so tired but allsoo keyed up up , that i want to top myself real bad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ambrosia Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 (((((((((((benji))))))))))))))Hey benji,I am sorry you had a crap night,Can you call someone?If you are feeling suicidal then you do really need to phone for help.Take care XxX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 Oh Benji. But you are here and you are talking to us. I'm sorry last night was crap, today can be brand new and sparkly. xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benji Posted May 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 Oh Benji. But you are here and you are talking to us. I'm sorry last night was crap, today can be brand new and sparkly. xxxxxI wish, boy am i a week prat, cant even cope one night , i had to pohone crisis team an they come at 11, mean time i work at things but not finish any, even its a job to keep eyes open but i must as thongs get worser if i close them, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 Oh Benji. But you are here and you are talking to us. I'm sorry last night was crap, today can be brand new and sparkly. xxxxxI wish, boy am i a week prat, cant even cope one night , i had to pohone crisis team an they come at 11, mean time i work at things but not finish any, even its a job to keep eyes open but i must as thongs get worser if i close them,Babe, you only just got back from hospital. It can take a while to adjust. I couldn't even boil an egg when I came out I was terrified and spent most of my time alone upstairs. Is Kia coming round to help you? Is there a day centre you can go to so that you are not alone? xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benji Posted May 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 Oh Benji. But you are here and you are talking to us. I'm sorry last night was crap, today can be brand new and sparkly. xxxxxI wish, boy am i a week prat, cant even cope one night , i had to pohone crisis team an they come at 11, mean time i work at things but not finish any, even its a job to keep eyes open but i must as thongs get worser if i close them,Babe, you only just got back from hospital. It can take a while to adjust. I couldn't even boil an egg when I came out I was terrified and spent most of my time alone upstairs. Is Kia coming round to help you? Is there a day centre you can go to so that you are not alone? xxxCrisis team will be here in 30 mins i hope, i didnt know things could get down hill after hosp, never mind though, i kick this thing in the asss sooon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 Yeah, you kick it in the ass babe! Crisis team should be with you by now, I hope it is going well and they are helpful for you. xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruth24 Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 Hey Benji,hoped things went well with crisis team. Roses is right. After a spell in hospital id does take time to adapt. i was desperate to get out, but once out i initially felt very alone and scared. I actually wanted to go back for some safety comfort!You'll beat this benji. Give it a good kick in the ass as you say Stay strongxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rael Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009 hope it went ok with the crisis team. coming out of hospital is so hard, no matter how much i have wanted to come out i have always felt so lost when i actually have. dont feel bad that you are finding it tough. you have been through a lot and are doing well, you are doing the right things by calling the crisis team and talking on here, it takes a lot to reach out.going downhill a bit doesnt mean you stay there, few roads are completely flat. you kick its ass xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benji Posted May 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted May 24, 2009 I know i post t much but last night was strange, i woke at 2 in morning crying and with a feeling of great guilt, no idea why, stayed in forum chat tilll about 4, dare not close eyes as thoughts start to come now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walker Posted May 24, 2009 Report Share Posted May 24, 2009 dear dear Benjilots of posts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( i am soooooooooooo guilty)and why shouldnt youcome here when you are alonei doall the timeyou are loved and cared for herei dont know about the problems you are having, sorrybut never feel bad about being herei hope in my heart they can find away to take these bad thoughts away for youplease take care my friendxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
axtell1080 Posted May 24, 2009 Report Share Posted May 24, 2009 IT TAKES TIME TO ADJUST WEN U FIRST COME HOME IT TOOK ME 3WEEKS TO GET OVER MY HOSPITAL STAY HUN...............U CAN BEAT THIS U ARE STRONGER THAN THIS ILLNESS BABE.XXXXXXXXXXXX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rael Posted May 24, 2009 Report Share Posted May 24, 2009 nothing wrong with posting hun, its much better to reach out and talk to people and im proud of you for doing that. is there anything you can do to help keep the thoughts away, i know for me music can help a lot but its whatever you find that helps.take carexxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thesloaneranger Posted May 24, 2009 Report Share Posted May 24, 2009 i hope you are doing ok benji. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted May 24, 2009 Report Share Posted May 24, 2009 Benji, you post away honey. I been thinking of you and wishing you well. xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rael Posted May 25, 2009 Report Share Posted May 25, 2009 hope you ok huntake carexxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kia Posted May 25, 2009 Report Share Posted May 25, 2009 Benji has gone back into hospital today.I know the thread title warns of this being a possible trigger, but I feel it only fair to add an additional warning here too.I'm going to post what happened under the dark posts section because it is a likely trigger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted May 25, 2009 Report Share Posted May 25, 2009 Thank you for letting us know Kia. My love is with you and your Dad xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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