NeedAName Posted June 10, 2009 Report Share Posted June 10, 2009 I hope this is appropriate, it will be vague so hopefully not a trigger, there's not too much I can say anyway but if it is a trigger or isn't appropriate to discuss then I appologise in advance.To get to the point, somedays I feel the need to be humiliated in some way, it's not a want or a desire, it's a need which I end up falling into, I find a camera and record myself calling myself names or doing something stupid, I suppose the camera acts as the person, when it's on, it feels like people are watching. It died down for a while when I started on my anti-depressents but it seems to have come back again and it's something I hate, I don't like the idea of being humiliated and I don't want to be but I feel I need to be.I really don't understand the need, maybe someone can explain why it happens and tell me something about it, one day I should list everything I'm not sure of just to save you the time :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted June 10, 2009 Report Share Posted June 10, 2009 humiliation is a form of punishment.. do you have guilt issues? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ocean Wolf Posted June 10, 2009 Report Share Posted June 10, 2009 Maybe it's low self esteem? Maybe some part of you feels you deserve it. Although I hope not because you don't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeedAName Posted June 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 10, 2009 Not that I know of, I'm scared of doing anything wrong, I've not done anything that I could feel guilty for recently, somedays I can't let it out because people are round and it's hard to keep it in. Unless there's something I did that I forgot about.Maybe it's low self esteem? Maybe some part of you feels you deserve it. Although I hope not because you don't.Maybe, it could be a way of blaming myself for every missed chance and everything like that and thanks, I know I don't but maybe part of people doesn't agree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rael Posted June 10, 2009 Report Share Posted June 10, 2009 it wouldnt necessarily have to be something you have actually done wrong. you say you are scared of doing anything wrong. i know i can preempt myself, even if i havent done anything i will beat myself up for it. guilt and the feeling you need punishment or humiliation may not lay in an actual bad act, but sometimes in the fear of the act or for thinking about it.there are probably many things that have led to this, things that add up in the mind and if they are similar then they can seem to us to show a pattern of bad things that either we have done or that have happened and that can lead to feeling the need to self punish. just my thoughts anyway.hope you ok xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crocus Posted June 11, 2009 Report Share Posted June 11, 2009 Could you be trying to toughen yourself up and make yourself less vulnerable to others trying to humiliate you? I am not saying that's what I think you are doing but is just an idea I had as a possibility. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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