Not Entitled To Opinions

[Shelley]

oh, meme, you really stirred up a lot of shit with your posting the other day, didnt you.

i am tired of reading about you and your friend ruth rowing, becoming friends, rowing , ad nauseum. this is a support forum, but i see the level of ctual support dropping by the day.

i dont feel you should be a mini mod here for several reasons-

you have offended a lot iof people

as a mini mod or whatever- you are expected to kinda have your own issues in check, and not be shitting them out all over the board. at the very least you are supposed to be a role model for new members!

you say you have college, a wife, kids,drink problems- well when i did peer support i was only able to do it for 4 weeks, then resigned. it was too much for me and i could identify that. maybe you should think about that too.

Now anyone here on the disabilty, income support, benefits, free doctors, therapists and an 'income' from the state know exactly how you really feel about them, no matter how much back peddling you do.

as a mini mod, you are supposed to find innapropriate posts and take them down- you put your own up

and im not into this reverse racism row- now puppylove & narinda are 'racist'-ridiculous! ffs, it was meme who opened up this pandoras box, and should close it.

and while this stupidity goes on, new members are being left out, and getting overlooked.

At last! Someone who speaks the truth! I agree with this 100%.

[Dani]

puppylove you say you feel your being accused...im sure that is how a lot of people feel about some of the things that you have said.

Now it seems to put it mildly everyones got off on the wrong foot....

We are here to support you not judge you so feel free to ask for support and let us try and help.

You have voiced your concerns as have others.Im sure everyone can move on from this.

Your thread s were going to get a big reaction because of some of the things you have said its very ovious.

I hope you are able to use the site for support.

take care

[Shelley]

This forum is not a pleasent place to be right now, so im staying away.

I need support, but dont think here is the right place at the moment.

[PuppyLove]

puppylove you say you feel your being accused...im sure that is how a lot of people feel about some of the things that you have said.

Now it seems to put it mildly everyones got off on the wrong foot....

We are here to support you not judge you so feel free to ask for support and let us try and help.

You have voiced your concerns as have others.Im sure everyone can move on from this.

Your thread s were going to get a big reaction because of some of the things you have said its very ovious.

I hope you are able to use the site for support.

take care

Thank you Dani,You are very kind

[Data]

oh, meme, you really stirred up a lot of shit with your posting the other day, didnt you.

i am tired of reading about you and your friend ruth rowing, becoming friends, rowing , ad nauseum. this is a support forum, but i see the level of ctual support dropping by the day.

i dont feel you should be a mini mod here for several reasons-

you have offended a lot iof people

as a mini mod or whatever- you are expected to kinda have your own issues in check, and not be shitting them out all over the board. at the very least you are supposed to be a role model for new members!

you say you have college, a wife, kids,drink problems- well when i did peer support i was only able to do it for 4 weeks, then resigned. it was too much for me and i could identify that. maybe you should think about that too.

Now anyone here on the disabilty, income support, benefits, free doctors, therapists and an 'income' from the state know exactly how you really feel about them, no matter how much back peddling you do.

as a mini mod, you are supposed to find innapropriate posts and take them down- you put your own up

and im not into this reverse racism row- now puppylove & narinda are 'racist'-ridiculous! ffs, it was meme who opened up this pandoras box, and should close it.

and while this stupidity goes on, new members are being left out, and getting overlooked.

I don't have my issues in check. And as far as I know there is no requirement to do so. What I am required to do is to keep within the rules of the site, as well as enforce them.

Nothing I have said breaks the rules of the site.

I have never had my issues in check. Thats why I take medication, to go therapy, and come here for support.

I can't help the way I feel. Even if it is "wrong" it is the way I feel. Everyone has their predjudices, weaknesses, etc, and all we can do is work on them. And part of my strategy for working on them has been to admit to them and be honest and face up to them.

What does not help is your judgemental attitude. So you are tired of hearing about my problems.. then don't read my posts.

There is no such thing as "reverse racism". If you discriminate against someone because of their colour, you are a racist. I am not a racist.

And I am not back peddling. I said at the time that I realised my feelings are irrational. You keep talking about stupidity - its your unfair distortion of what I wrote that is stupid.

[maripol]

White people are racially attacked too you know, it works both ways.

you can't compare the two, is what I'm saying.

38 posts is a nice even number...

The only reason you can't compare the two is because it's ignored. Or because of where you are. Maybe you don't hear or see it where you are. Or maybe you just don't want to.

to assume one group of people have it any worse than any other group due to prejudice is incredibley nieve and assuming any one persons experience can be defined by the experience of the group they are being catagorised as is incredibley ignorant and lacking in compassion and prejudice in and of itself.

To whine about how you experience racism as a Caucasian, and assuming that's comparable to what other colors experience is ridiculous, and incredibly insensitive and ignorant of the shit they actually experience. it really is just whining, and there's a reason no one will take you seriously when it comes to that.

[Sammy]

Woah!!!!! I think you are the insensitive one here! How can you possibly tell someone that racism they experience is less than racism someone else experiences?

If I get kicked, beaten, called names, harassed, spat at by a black person racially motivated, how is that crime or my experience any less valid than a black person who experiences the same thing from a white person?

[maripol]

Woah!!!!! I think you are the insensitive one here! How can you possibly tell someone that racism they experience is less than racism someone else experiences?

If I get kicked, beaten, called names, harassed, spat at by a black person racially motivated, how is that crime or my experience any less valid than a black person who experiences the same thing from a white person?

Your the reason Dre aint been gettin no sleep.

[sundries]

Puppylove I am sorry you think that this forum would reject someone purely on the basis of their skin colour. I do not believe you are right.

Im also sorry that you feel hurt by the thought that people would reject you. Thats entirely understandable anyone would feel hurt.

However, if there are 'racist' people on here

This forum is open to anyone and therefore there may be some people on this site who are 'racist, sexist etc...' If that is the case then that is the case. If there was someone lying on the road injured who I knew to be stigmatising i would not cross to the other side, even if they would if it were me.

I do not believe the forum would reject people purely because of thier beliefs but abuse on whatever grounds will be discouraged/removed/result in a ban.

I hope that responds to your original post puppy love.

I would also like to add that making a blanket statement that accuses and criticises people who are not racist of being racist (you accuse the whole forum not just those on the forum who may be) makes unfounded assumptions, is unfair and going to be very hurtful and insulting.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The rest of this thread has moved onto political debate,consideration of the nature of racism discussion of personal experiences of racism and personal abuse towards meme.

I suggest that those people who want to be abusive towards meme start a separate thread for it and then the mods can deal with that thread as they see fit.

The same goes for the debate on racism.

[Sammy]

I concede to most of your points sundries, but the nature of this thread was originally about racism! Racism that Puppylove felt, therefore I see no reason for others not to share their experiences too or racism in general on this thread.

[catspiracy]

If you discriminate against someone because of their colour, you are a racist. I am not a racist.

One sense of the word "discriminate" is "to make a distinction based on x". And you have made such a distinction, you are not "color blind", and therefore in some sense "racist". On the other hand, I wonder how many people really ARE colorblind, and I personally reject recent politics here in my state regarding abolishing affirmative action etc on the basis of it being racial discrimination. Racism against black people (in america at least) is entrenched in every institution. For example, generations ago, whites were granted many privileges including buying property that black people were banned from. That resulted in familial wealth on the white side, and familial poverty on the black side that simple-minded "color blindness" won't erase. That's why some distinctions according to race are necessary and proper when applied positively to change institutionalized racist social structures.

on the other hand, I live in a city where caucasians are the minority, and my children experience anti-white hazing in our public schools. To be honest, I think this is character building as long as we continue to keep them safe from the harsher forms of bullying. My children understand what it's like to be a racial minority at the same time as being members of the dominant race in my country. They have a full spectrum experience.

I personally was raised in a very blended situation with a black god father, black baby sitters, and a significant percentage of black schoolmates. It always amuses me to receive new black acquaintances' assumptions about me as a white woman, and then change them with my true self.

Puppy Love, I am very sorry that you have had enough miserably racist interactions that you hate your own skin (you said you dislike being black in another thread if I am not mistaken?) I hope that you read up on the black is beautiful movement and regain some sense of pride of your outstanding heritage. And if you are being hazed in your hometown, by all means, it's worth it to move out, become an activist, or otherwise come to terms with the huge degree of ignorance still clinging to unhappy people's small minds. We make things happen in our lives when they are truly priorities to us.

love and light to all of you,

cat

[Roses]

We have the MOBO awards. Where are the MOWO awards?

[roxy222]

White people are racially attacked too you know, it works both ways.

you can't compare the two, is what I'm saying.

38 posts is a nice even number...

The only reason you can't compare the two is because it's ignored. Or because of where you are. Maybe you don't hear or see it where you are. Or maybe you just don't want to.

to assume one group of people have it any worse than any other group due to prejudice is incredibley nieve and assuming any one persons experience can be defined by the experience of the group they are being catagorised as is incredibley ignorant and lacking in compassion and prejudice in and of itself.

To whine about how you experience racism as a Caucasian, and assuming that's comparable to what other colors experience is ridiculous, and incredibly insensitive and ignorant of the shit they actually experience. it really is just whining, and there's a reason no one will take you seriously when it comes to that.

i wasnt talking about my experience, i was refering to many other people experience that you clearly have no interest in. as it happens i am someone who is mostly taken seriously, probably something to do with being intelligent and open minded rather than jumping to unfair concusions.........

[Jinxsta]

LMAO Roses.... so right, im not gonna get too involved in this coz u can't even ask for a black coffee these days without being called racist..... but i will say; i was attacked yesterday by a gang of people... hmmm how do i say this PC.... of a different ethnic background to me, for being gay, i admittidly retaliated with a "considered rascist comment in around about way saying if he didnt like it he should go back...... to which the gang attacked, thinking its fine to discriminate against my sexuality but its an ultimate sin to retaliate against race........ I believe everyone is entitled to there opinion, good or bad.... he was entitled to be homophobic, and im entitled to retaliate against this.

Just thought i would throw that out there.... no intentions of offending anyone.

Peace out

XxxX

[aurorablues]

Jesus Christ people!! Will you all just walk away from this argument, it is getting silly now!

This is a support forum for mental health issues not a political debate forum

I couldn't give two craps what colour anyone is, i wouldn't even have known puppyloves skin colour if they didn't mention it and now i know it, will it make me treat them any different? hell no! Unless they made a personal attack at me. Then things would be different.

Puppylove, sorry meme's post triggered you, it upset me also for different reasons. Try not to take it too personally.

Meme, reading that thread you made, i get the impression lately that you seem to enjoy the recent chaos from your controversial posts. Maybe you like the arguments they cause? Gives you some sort of power or control? Hmmmm? Just a thought

Let's give the new ones the benefit of the doubt, before calling them trolls and chasing them out of the forum.

Yes we are all entitled to our own opinions, doesn't make them right though, and doesn't make them anyless upsetting to the people they trigger

Aurora

[Sammy]

I don't think puppylove is a troll (jmho), I think she has self esteem issues and projects that onto others - which a LOT of us here do! I think it is important for us as a support forum, to help puppy love (and others) realise that the way they feel about themselves is not how everyone else feels about them, and maybe even help her learn to like herself a bit more and feel proud of who she is. I am absolutely positive that puppy love has many good traits and charecteristics and I'm sure she also has many achievements in her life to feel proud of.

[Roses]

nobody has said Puppy Love is a bad person, I'm sure she has had an interesting life and has family and friends who love her dearly and want her to be well. It is just difficult to see eye to eye sometimes I appreciate that too. I know that her and I will probably never hit it off as we are very different people but I do not wish her any harm.

[les66]

Not getting involved in the arguement/debate. Just want everyone to know that I will help/support them in anyway I possibly can regardless of colour/sexuality or anything else anyone wants to throw in.

Take Care

Leslie x

[Ruth24]

I agree with les66.

Sadly i did get involved in the debate/argument and i regret it. But now it is over i hope we can carry on supporting each other and focus on that

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Data]

Will you all just walk away from this argument, it is getting silly now!

Meme, reading that thread you made, i get the impression lately that you seem to enjoy the recent chaos from your controversial posts. Maybe you like the arguments they cause? Gives you some sort of power or control? Hmmmm? Just a thought

Yes we are all entitled to our own opinions, doesn't make them right though, and doesn't make them anyless upsetting to the people they trigger

I do not want to add fuel to the fire but I feel the need to defend myself.

Believe it or not, I do not enjoy this trouble, I have been in bits over it. I've had nightmares over BPDWORLD. I have been lying in bed, with the covers over me in the day, my heart pounding, thinking about this forum. I did not want this to happen. Last night I drank far too much to blot it out. Today I have done no uni work because of it. I deeply regret it.

I acknowledged in the post that the opinions are not right, but I did not realise they would trigger so many so badly.

[Dani]

meme you have apologised and expressed your regret in posting what you did.

Its a shame that this is effecting you so much...you don't deserve to be left feeling the way you have been.

Yes i can see why people have been offended ...i disagreed myself with what you had written but i feel you have explained and apologised enough.

I hate to think that because of it its affecting you so much.

hopefully everyone can move on.

xxx

[aurorablues]

Will you all just walk away from this argument, it is getting silly now!

Meme, reading that thread you made, i get the impression lately that you seem to enjoy the recent chaos from your controversial posts. Maybe you like the arguments they cause? Gives you some sort of power or control? Hmmmm? Just a thought

Yes we are all entitled to our own opinions, doesn't make them right though, and doesn't make them anyless upsetting to the people they trigger

I do not want to add fuel to the fire but I feel the need to defend myself.

Believe it or not, I do not enjoy this trouble, I have been in bits over it. I've had nightmares over BPDWORLD. I have been lying in bed, with the covers over me in the day, my heart pounding, thinking about this forum. I did not want this to happen. Last night I drank far too much to blot it out. Today I have done no uni work because of it. I deeply regret it.

I acknowledged in the post that the opinions are not right, but I did not realise they would trigger so many so badly.

I'm glad that what i suggested is wrong and i apologise. I'm sorry the aftermath is affecting you so badly, we should all move on and hopefully learn something from this experience

Aurora :)

[Shelley]

Will you all just walk away from this argument, it is getting silly now!

Meme, reading that thread you made, i get the impression lately that you seem to enjoy the recent chaos from your controversial posts. Maybe you like the arguments they cause? Gives you some sort of power or control? Hmmmm? Just a thought

Yes we are all entitled to our own opinions, doesn't make them right though, and doesn't make them anyless upsetting to the people they trigger

I do not want to add fuel to the fire but I feel the need to defend myself.

Believe it or not, I do not enjoy this trouble, I have been in bits over it. I've had nightmares over BPDWORLD. I have been lying in bed, with the covers over me in the day, my heart pounding, thinking about this forum. I did not want this to happen. Last night I drank far too much to blot it out. Today I have done no uni work because of it. I deeply regret it.

I acknowledged in the post that the opinions are not right, but I did not realise they would trigger so many so badly.

meme,

I know what that feels like, and its dreadfull.

I have said/done hurtfull things when ive been drunk in the passed (not saying you were drunk) and woke up mortified.

I was triggerd by your post, and made to feel like 'dole scum', I cut last night, Im not saying thats your fault, just saying how you made me feel.

None of us are perfect.

And you have expressed your regret.

I hope now we can all get back to how things were.

Shelley xxx

[successful_workthru]

I replied to a post about racists etc,I am black myself,I admit i was offended by that post,in fact it triggered me bad,feels like everyone is now ignoring me cos i said that i am black, i feel like everyone is against me here.

Im not against you, and nothing against you, but skin colour seems irrelevant to me, it is about what the person's character is like.

:)

[maripol]

If you discriminate against someone because of their colour, you are a racist. I am not a racist.

One sense of the word "discriminate" is "to make a distinction based on x". And you have made such a distinction, you are not "color blind", and therefore in some sense "racist". On the other hand, I wonder how many people really ARE colorblind, and I personally reject recent politics here in my state regarding abolishing affirmative action etc on the basis of it being racial discrimination. Racism against black people (in america at least) is entrenched in every institution. For example, generations ago, whites were granted many privileges including buying property that black people were banned from. That resulted in familial wealth on the white side, and familial poverty on the black side that simple-minded "color blindness" won't erase. That's why some distinctions according to race are necessary and proper when applied positively to change institutionalized racist social structures.

on the other hand, I live in a city where caucasians are the minority, and my children experience anti-white hazing in our public schools. To be honest, I think this is character building as long as we continue to keep them safe from the harsher forms of bullying. My children understand what it's like to be a racial minority at the same time as being members of the dominant race in my country. They have a full spectrum experience.

I personally was raised in a very blended situation with a black god father, black baby sitters, and a significant percentage of black schoolmates. It always amuses me to receive new black acquaintances' assumptions about me as a white woman, and then change them with my true self.

Puppy Love, I am very sorry that you have had enough miserably racist interactions that you hate your own skin (you said you dislike being black in another thread if I am not mistaken?) I hope that you read up on the black is beautiful movement and regain some sense of pride of your outstanding heritage. And if you are being hazed in your hometown, by all means, it's worth it to move out, become an activist, or otherwise come to terms with the huge degree of ignorance still clinging to unhappy people's small minds. We make things happen in our lives when they are truly priorities to us.

love and light to all of you,

cat

This is a good, level headed post, thanks for making it.