Hopeless Newbie

[devilswhispers]

Hey, im new on this site (FINALLY found one that has no pro bullsh*t)

Im 19, been suffering with anorexia since the age of 11, and i hate it. ive tried almost everything. DBT (dilectical behaviour therapy), been in hospital, tube fed, in a clinic, day programmes, stupid meds that r ment 2 screw ur appitite and make u gain, food supps (ensure + etc) and i always land straight back where i started. i cant help myself, it just takes over and b4 i know it im lying thru my teeth and playing games again. I dont want to lie, i hate it and its not me, but anorexias a devious little b*tch. im a (4months) ex self harmer my arms and legs r gross tho, completely wrinkles with scars over scars and stitches over stitches.I hate this. i wish i was OK, even if just 4 day. im so split. i want 2 get better, but i DONT want to put on weight, speshly as my goal weight is insane. i feel disgusting whatever weight tho, some days r better, but most days r just a huge battle in my head. im eating better than i have in a long time, but my weights at a stand still (good 4 anorexia, bad 4 me) ahhhh haaaate it. sorry, casual rant. idk if im putting ths in right place even! anyway just looking for some support i guess, so i know im not alone plz write back, idk if i belong in a forum like this, i always feel like a intruder

anyway,hope 2 hear from u all & get 2 know u

devilswhispers xx

[Shelley]

Hi and wecome to the site, I don't have an ED but I know lot's here who do, so im sure you will get the support you need. xxx

[mayleigh]

hia. im also new to the site so still finding my way around

I also have an ED 10 year bulimic.

Looking around so far this place seems great and i aggree no pro ana / mia bul*it.

i think we all feel like a bit of an intruder to start with but get posting and im sure we'll make some friends here.

8-)