Hiya! Newbie Looking For Advice/suggestions Re. Diagnosis

[ktspike]

Hi all! I've just joined up to 'touch base' (awful business type phrase) with some people who might be in a similar situation as me and to see if anyone has any advice. Its nice to find somewhere to speak to people with similar experiences.

I wonder if anyone has any suggestions for me regarding helping me obtain a proper diagnosis? I am seeing a therapist and have been pushing for a diagnosis for ages, both from a psychologist previously and from my therapist recently. I am due to have an appointment with a consultant psychiatrist and therapist next week, but I have got the impression my therapist thinks it would be unhelpful to give me diagnosis, and in her words 'attach a label to me'. She has 'off the record' told me both she and the consultant think I have BPD with depressive tendencies but she would be reluctant to put in writing as on official diagnosis. Her opinion is it wouldn't serve me beneficially and I may use it as an excuse for my actions etc, rather than dealing with them. My opinion is I think it would help me to put the final piece of jigsaw in the puzzle and help me accept myself, my problems and also help others know what they are dealing with with me, as simply telling managers at work its depression, or anxiety simply doesn't offer a sufficient explanation.

Has anyone got any ideas as to how I can convince them to make my diagnosis official as I feel it has been skirted around for years now and would just like things settled.

Anyone else had difficulty being officially diagnosed for fear of 'labeling' you?

Hope someone has some advice, if not its just god to get it off my chest to people who may understand, cheers

ktspike

x

:-)

[placebo69a]

I have a great idea on how to convince them to make your diagnosis official:

Tell them you want them to make the BPD diagnosis official against their advice. Let them know you understand their concerns but that you'd rather deal with BPD stigmatization than with the uncertainty of not having an accurate diagnosis. They are trying to protect and that's admirable - They seem to genuinely care about the quality of treatment you will receive. They fail to see how their attempts to protect you are causing you harm. Help them to see just how not having an official diagnosis makes you feel, what it makes you worry about, how it's getting in the way of your getting better... Who knows maybe they can help you cope without exposing you to BPD stigmatization, or perhaps they'll weigh in your opinion and decide to make the diagnosis official.

If you're determined to get diagnosed with BPD I suggest you contact a private therapist who has experience with treating BPD patients and specializes in CBT/DBT and have them do intake sessions with you. They can probably diagnose you in 2-4 sessions. They'll also be able to point you in the right direction for appropriate treatment for your disorder.

Hope this helps. :)

[ktspike]

Wow! Thanks for that! I've never joined any forums etc before so I have just been looking through some stuff trying to get to grips with replying etc. I wasn't expecting to get a reply so soon, thanks. Hopefully being more assertive than perhaps I have been in the past will help, I will try putting it to them like that, it makes sense. As I say, I'm not just looking for a label as the diagnosis has been made already just not put in writing officially, which in my mind would help. Fingers crossed next week then that I can make them see my point of view rather better than I have up to now.

Thanks again!

I think I may be visiting here quite often, there's some really cool and interesting stuff and people on here!

x

:)

[piuma]

hey i hope you do, there is always lots of adive and some lovely people. i know i had trouble getting a diagnosis, but i after i put my foot downand said i want to know, from the psychiatrist, he skirted round it and said i have emtionally unstable personality mixed with personality disorders and i said soooo basically bpd, (a psychologist told me years back i was bpd) and he said basically yes! hope that helps a little and look forward to seeing you here more xx

[ktspike]

That's fab cheers! Its so nice to hear from other people in similar situations. I'm trying to get to grips with managing my profile as much as I am trying to get to grips with managing my 'issues'! lol Challenging stuff! :)

[Roses]

Hey Spike. Welcome to these boards. I'm sorry to go against the other advice on here but I am happier without the BPD label. I escaped and I'm happy about it. I was given the right drugs and treatment for BPD without the label. Just research it a bit before you go rushing into a dx. It's nice to have a written answer but here in the UK so much support is denied BPD sufferers just because they are BPD. Just make sure you go in with your eyes open. xxx

[Shelley]

Hi spike and welcome.

Roses has put across a very good point there, I have BPD, and since being diagnosed I have been treated unfairly by the mental health services. A BPD diagnosis can be as good as writing you off completly, as far as the mental health proffesionals go, I pushed for a dx.....wish I hadn't.

But it's up to you and what your happiest with. Best of luck.

Anna xxx

[ktspike]

Thanks for your advice guys! Its good to hear both sides of the story. I'm sorry to hear that the support out there for people with BPD is somewhat mixed or indeed lacking. Up til now the support I have had has been brilliant, but the question is will that actually change with a diagnosis? My 'therapy' has just come to an end as of this week, (and as much as I cringed at the thought of it to start with, it has helped), so I feel like maybe I just need the last piece of the puzzle rather than looking for more in the way of support. I have a huge amount of support from family, GP and also from my works occupational health department, who have been great. What sort of reaction have people had from their employers? My boss used to work in psychiatric medicine so has asked lots about my diagnosis aswell as being very supportive. Have any of you found having a diagnosis helps explain things to other people? Telling them, depression/anxiety, just never covers it all and leaves so much open to incorrect interpretation, or conjecture. Who knows? Maybe more time sleeping on it, and I guess I'll just have to see what the psychiatrist will have to say.

Thanks for your support anyway guys! Nice to hear!

x :)

[Benway]

Hi & welcome

love your avatar!

personally, i wis i didnt have te bpd label either. now apparantly its dwindled to 'bpd traits'- my diagnosis. i got dx'ed with bpd 00/01.

honest;y- one does get treated unfairly imho, i wouldnt wis a dx of it on anyone.

if ypu can possibly avoid it- being practical- then do avoid it.

just my advice

take care

annemarie

[successful_workthru]

Maybe you havent got BPD

Maybe write a list of your symptoms and show it to the psych.

I want a diagnosis too, because I feel that I have more than depression.

I have pervasive relatioship difficulties among other stuff.

Self harm tendencies.

Proneness to substance abuse, although I am well clean from the illicits now.

[ktspike]

Honestly, I'm overwhelmed by the support you guys have shown! Just having peeps that get you, without judgment is such a relief. As far as symptoms go, self harm is just the most obvious, without getting into details at the mo. But I currently have my arm in plaster from having broken it by smashing it with a hammer amongst other things. Cringe! There are many other things attached to my potential diagnosis but getting it (if indeed that is what I want) is the issue. I'm really likiing being part of a group of people that get it! x

[ktspike]

p.s. being rid of the illicit stuff....definitely a good move! me too! Alchohol is the vice of the mo, but I'm trying to kick it. Honestly......such relief!!!

:)

[chorse_70]

welcome to the site

[mek]

Hello dear! It doesn't seem like they want to ever diagnose someone with bpd for some reason. The only thing I could come up with was insurrance reasons.??? IDK. But when they finally do it is a relief. I actually (and embarrassingly) felt proud- because at least I was something! Now, I'd rather not be borderline, but that's the way it is. Cant' change that. Bummer! It is important to us to have an actual diagnosis. And there are so many books on BPD and DBT that can help us. You do have to stand up and be ur own advocate. If u do not think they are getting u or are not meeting ur needs, you are the one who has to do something about it. For me, it took 3 therapists and 2 psychiatrists over a years time to get what I knew I needed. Stick with it and know that you are in control of this. There are plenty of docs and therapists out there. You just need to find the one(s) that u click with.

Keep us updated!

Hugs :wub:

[ktspike]

Hi Mek! Thanks for your support. My assessment with the Consultant Psychiatrist and my T is on thursday and I'm crapping myself about it. Not just the diagnosis but having to go over stuff again when the work I've done with my T has helped. I get what you mean about having the diagnosis, means you actually feel like you ARE something. I think thats part of it for me, the finality. I don't think anyone would actually WANT to have BPD or indeed any PD but at least it IS something as opposed to being reduced to bits of this and that and no definitive answer. I've had countless therapists and this is the closest I've got to an answer. We'll see anyway. Thanks again. I'll post on thursday afterwards. It may just be necessary to vent afterwards.

Cheers

xx

[ezzmae]

I've never been diagnosed officially either. When admitted to a private hospital after one of my many suicide attempts about 6 years ago the psychiatrist suggested I have BPD. At the time I was disgusted because I work in the helping professions and what I knew of BPD was just too much for me to cope with or own up to at the time. I went on to begin with a psychotherapist who said he thought I could be "high functioning BPD" but he never committed to anything. Having run away from that therapy all the way to another country I tried therapy again in my new home for the past 4 years but the therapist I met with refused to agree that I had BPD. However, running away from the very painful and traumatic experience of more therapy I now feel I probably do have BPD and since I can control my emotions at times I guess I am high functioning or perhaps I have BPD traits. What ever way I know I have to stick with some kind of program as I am going to end up so lonely and destroy every intimate relationship I ever have. I am so afraid of abandonment and yet I sabotage any good thing that happens in my life. Alcohol is usually at the centre of all my troubles and drugs which were easier to kick but they still feature at times.

Does anyone think CBT can work for someone with BPD when there is no DBT available?

[aeh8165]

I'm glad that you want to get diagnosed for your own benefit, but a diagnosis isn't a finality. It's the beginning of a very long and hard road ahead of you. It's going to take a lot more than getting a diagnosis to end it. I hate to be a downer but it's going to probably cause more problems. I wish that I never was diagnosed. It makes it harder not just because of the stigma and what others act like around me now, but it's caused a lot of problems within myself and realizing that this is something I am probably going to have live with forever. I don't want to dissuade you from your decision, but you shouldn't give up on therapy if you like your therapist, and you're going to need to stay in some kind of treatment if you really are BPD and want to get better. Best of luck!

[ktspike]

Thanks for your post Imnotemo. Sorry to hear a diagnosis hasn't helped, you. Sadly it seems to be the story with a few people. For me, I realise that a diagnosis is likely the start not the end, but what I mean more is I feel its the final piece of the puzzle. Having the complete picture, I hope and I feel, would make it easier for me personally, to start to put things into a better order in my head, by having a fuller understanding of what's going on, and being able to put a name on it. But then thats just me. Its different for everyone isn't it. I may be wrong, it may not help but then I guess they'll tell me tomorrow. Unfortunately I've just had to end therapy as the NHS don't extend CAT therapy any longer than 4 months, tho they'll be open for me should I need. But then I have been with a number of T's for a few years already and actually the CAT has helped better than most. Have you or anyone else had CAT? I'm trying to see it as a start to a new future of coping rather than a loss, tho that's not always easy. At the moment I can do that, a few hours ago, far from it. I'm pretty confident I will have to live with this for a very long time, if not indeed, forever. I'm trying to accept it as just who I am, you know, the 'one with the issues!' Take care and I hope you are getting the T you need too! Cheers x