Can't Eat Won't Eat

[an9i]

I can't eat! If I get VERY hungry, usually after exercise, I can eat a little bit (my body needs kind of just takes over) but apart from that I can't eat at all. I just don't want food anywhere near my mouth. The thought of it makes me feel sick. Before this happened I was on a diet, excluded all carbohydrates from my diet except veg, lost a lot of weight and now it's like i've switched off to food. T thinks I'm developing anorexic tendencies.

It's not that I'm desperately trying to lose weight, well I am wanting to lose a little more but it's not that I'm denying myself food exactly, I just don't want anything to do with the stuff.

Can anyone relate to this?

Thanks

Angi

[Roses]

Yup, I'm with you hun. You need to get help and support pronto. www.b-eat.co.uk

[an9i]

The problem is, Roses, that part of me doesn't want to stop. I'm enjoying the sense of control and losing weight. Until the part of me that does want to stop is bigger than the part that doesn't then I don't know if I can get any help. My t who I saw for the last time yesterday as I am moving is passing my care to another t in new city - so someone is aware - but I won't see her for three weeks.

I don't know if this is anorexia or not, I suppose it must be but it doesn't feel like I am denying myself food as I don't actually want it in the first place.

Not sure if you've experienced similar Roses but thanks for your message.

Anyone out there who can tell me if this is anorexia cos I have never been like this before!

[Roses]

We all go through patches in our lives when we don't want to eat much and stuff. I think anorexia is a prolonged illness. When I was an early teen I ate 2 lettuce leaves, a tomato and 2 slices of cucumber a day. That's all every day - but I did it for over a year and at my worst wouldn't eat anything at all for weeks at a time. I was diagnosed with anorexia (cos Mum dragged me to the GP) and given build-up shakes and iron tablets. Luckily my weight was not low enought to require in patient treatment. I then developed builimia in lat teens and have been up and down ever since.

To determine whether you are 'anorexic' or not you need to see a doctor. Look at how much weight you have lost and if you just want to be thin or is it that you have a phobia about the food entering your mouth. I have a friend who struggles to eat through an irrational fear of choking.

Hope this is more helpful.

[an9i]

I have lost around two stone, I was compulsive eater and overweight (12 st) now I am around 10st and can't go back to compulsive eating cos of diabetes, so I don't know if my BPD brain is thinking it'll try undereating instead. I couldn't possibly be normal!!

Want to lose at least another stone but who knows, once that's gone maybe I'll want to lose more. I am a healthy weight for my height now (5'4'').

I just have no appetite and am getting a bit of a buzz out of seeing how long I can go without eating. It feels yukky to have food in my mouth, or stomach so I've been having soya protein shakes when hungry.

I ate a chicken leg yesterday and that was all, although had a lot of booze in the evening.

I can't believe this is a complete u-turn from how I used to be. I used to scoff for britain, couldn't go more than an hour or two without putting junk food in my mouth, binged regularly on sweets and all things bad. Then I began to develop diabetic retinopathy which scared the shit out of me and I stopped eating carbs. So I think now maybe it's gone too far the other way as I see food as 'the thing that will make me go blind'. Although it's really only carbs that will make me go blind but it seems to have seeped into other foods now, so that I don't want to eat anything.

At least I think that's what's going on - it's like I'm trying to get as far away from my compulsive eating days as possible as that was literally causing me to risk blindness and I still have some visual probs now which I don't know if they'll ever go away.

Thanks for reading

[placebo69a]

I get this way sometimes. It used to happen more when I was on various meds.

Not eating does not put you in control. The feeling is false and you're causing yourself very real physical harm by avoiding eating. I entertained the same thoughts of control, and curiosity about how long I could go without eating and how much weight I could lose that way.

Then I did a very smart thing - I googled starvation and started reading the cold hard facts about not eating. It's not responsible for losing you any weight and the damage caused by not eating for any lengthy period of time is severe, sometimes permanent.

I suggest you read up on denying yourself food and see for yourself what it means, the process it starts in your body and the consequences should you persist. Then you can make a reasoned choice about it instead of just going with your gut feelings.

Here's a link to get you started.

[Jaimie_CS]

Lately I've started to fantasize about getting really thin. Last week I had a really low 4 days, and I didnt eat much or binge, which is pretty unusual for me and I rarely go a day without b/p.

But naturally, i lost a few pounds and I feel good about it.

I dont need to lose a few pounds, i want to, but im already pretty thin and i really shouldnt lose too much more weight. (62kg - 176cm)

but now i cant stop fantasizing about my hip bones sticking out, and my cheeks hollowing out and my wrists being tiny and (i hate to admit it) the concern it would cause in a few of my friends im feeling neglected by. I simultaneously want their attention, and want them to feel guilty for not taking good enough care of me.

which makes me feel pretty low.

[mek]

I question whether it's anorexia or not as well. If we aren't really trying to lose weight, is it wrong not to eat because the very thought of st in our bodies makes us ill? I can't stand the feeling of food in my body as well. So is it an issue? Maybe check ur BMI. If ur causing harm to urself by not eating, it is a problem. Maybe someone here will know how to tell the difference. :wub:

[an9i]

Hey, thanks for your replies everyone. Just to let you know - I ate! Went to the gym and did about an hour of cardio, must have burned around 500 cals, by the time I got home I was mega hungry and had some mussels, soup and cheese.

So it seems that when my body gets hungry enough it breaks thru the 'can't eat' barrier and then I can eat.

Not sure what I've got but as a bpd'er I can't do moderation - always need to take things to extremes.

Don't think I am harming myself as I am eating just about enough to keep myself ticking over, thanks for your concern.

Angi xx

[Jaimie_CS]

I'm glad you ate ani.

xx.

[ms_fett]

If you do want to have control over your weight you should see your doctor or a specialist to regulate your diet. Doing so alone can be very dangerous if you don't know what you're doing. Don't calculate your own BMI either because that chart isn't very accurate, just a guideline. The only person that should be diagnosing you as overweight/underweight should be a doctor.

And if it makes you feel a little better about your overall health a light walk after a meal is always good.