Roses Posted October 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Thanks Sloane. Things are a little better today. I have managed to understand why hubbie said what he did to the police and have told him I understand and that he did nothing wrong. It is hard on us both. xxxxx And Dear Walker, thank you a good long sleep has helped me a lot. xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Hi Roses Am confoozed, mabbe I missed it .. what did hubbie say to the police? Dont have to talk about it if u dont wannooo tho ... Love panda hat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 *puts on Panda hat* Well, they interviewed me for 1 3/4 hours on the gruesome details. Then on way home said that they would likea quick chat with hubbie. Hubbie had halfday to be at home and support me with dinner and looking after kids. So she came to see him at 3pm and apart from a quick 10min dash to get kids she didn't leave until 5.30pm!!!! I was left with looking after kids upstairs and a 4/40 came down and said I needed to get tea ready could they go into lounge (is open kitchen but they can close door on lounge). I rushed to get tea ready and that and was in a right state. Then later hubbie tells me how he had to recite to her all the personal details of our relationship. When we together, when we apart, my moods, sex life, od's, sh - everything. I was upset cos I had been left with kids and I felt he was blaming all the problems in our relationship on me and my problems - which is not true. But today I am calmer and I can see he was trying to help and I'm sure they will realise it was partly his fault but more like 60/40 me to him. I do understand that my childhood has affected my adult relationships. Anyways when my parents are interviewed I'm sure they will slag him right off for all his ill doings. I just hate this cos I didn't think all of our relationship would be 'evidence'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villan Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 i am guessing, and this is just a guess... i have no experience in these things, but i think that they need to know the "what is happening now" so that they can build a case not only for how this has affected you at the time, but also how it is is STILL affecting you to this day... or maybe to do with compensation or something... i am so sorry that you and hubby had to open your life up like that, but i would hope that the police know what they are doing and would only ask thise questions if they had to... ((((((((((((((((((((roses&family)))))))))))))))))))))))) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx no candle here at work but i will google image one and try have it open on my pc as much as poss for you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Thank you Chips. Yeah, today I can see what they are doing and why they did it. It's just wierd that they didn't really want to know any of this from me. Why just from him? I guess they will be able to find out my stuff from medical notes and that, or is it that they didn't want to ask me anymore yesterday? I don't know. But you are right Chips, they know what they are doing and I'm sure they are only acting in my best interests. xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villan Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Glad you feel better hunni... please keep us posted about this, jus so I know when u need a lil extra support or candle power !!!! Hopefully, you are rewarding yourself for everything you achieve, cos i know you deserve it... Just wish that I had an ounce of your strength sometimes... Love you loads Kath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Hi Roses I can see why you might be feelin worried, becuz it would feel like something was going on behind yr back. This is such a mssive issue, that has been invalidated and ignored for so much of your life, and really they should respect that and be as open as possible. Did hub tell you what they talked about, or would u rather not know? Just wonderin ... Ross Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 He told me briefly but not the details as he was too upset. I have told no-one of what I said in that interview room. Yes, at first I tried to listen in a bit but gave up as I trust he will tell me what is safe for me to hear considering all things. Thanks for the candle Chips, it's a lovely picture and thanks for the support Panda-hat xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruth24 Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 This is an incredibly difficult time for you. I can't imagine the emotional pressure. You are doing such an amazing job, keep up the fight hun, you can do it xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plumpynut Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 OMG when you said you had a lot going on Rose I did not imagine all this. I am so proud of you. You are so brave. Take care and keep it up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Thanks Ruthie and Plumpynut. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plumpynut Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Thanks Ruthie and Plumpynut. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx You have been busy x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 22, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 22, 2009 The local Child Protection Unit rang me today (and left a message as I have phone unplugged). They said that the notes from both my and my husband's statements have been typed up and sent to the local area team where my family and brother live to be handled down there. They told hubbie the other day that they had made some team or other aware of my brother the moment I left the interview suite on Tuesday. I guess now that it has been forwarded to their area they are imminently to be informed of proceedings. Hmmm.... I think the phone will remain unplugged for some time to come. Just letting you know what's happening. Roses xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villan Posted October 22, 2009 Report Share Posted October 22, 2009 sill holding your hand, still lighting your candle... still there for you whatever you need... xxxxxxx (((((((((((((((((((roses))))))))))))))))))))))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 22, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 22, 2009 Thanks Chips darlin', it means a lot! xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruth24 Posted October 22, 2009 Report Share Posted October 22, 2009 You're doing an amazing thing. I'm so glad his children will be protected. Stay strong roses. We are here for you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thesloaneranger Posted October 22, 2009 Report Share Posted October 22, 2009 *hugs roses* im glad to hear everythings being taken so seriously..proud of ya hun! x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 22, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 22, 2009 Thank you Ruthie and Sloane xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jades Posted October 23, 2009 Report Share Posted October 23, 2009 lil tramp im sorry i havent been more help but ive been tracking your posts and im up to date lemme just say i couldnt be more proud of you!!! ive been thinking of you everyday. love you sooooo much xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx :wub: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted October 23, 2009 Report Share Posted October 23, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted October 23, 2009 Report Share Posted October 23, 2009 And another Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 23, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 23, 2009 Thanks Jades hun. xxxxx I just had an email from the government and there were no guidelines introduced for possible abuse cases until 1988 and seeing as how my records have now been shredded it is the end of the road for that line of enquiry but I am happy that I asked and I now know the school didn't break any rules, cos there weren't any. Just edit cos Rossie hunny posted same time as me! Thanks for the huggles and constant snuggles. I truly do love my Panda Hat xxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ambrosia Posted October 24, 2009 Report Share Posted October 24, 2009 (((((Roses))))) Roses,what you are doing is amazing,you must have alot of strength and courage inside you...Truly an amazing woman. Ambrosia xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squeakybird Posted October 29, 2009 Report Share Posted October 29, 2009 Hi Rose, Bird here. I think some good replies have been posted and addressed here especially what if you can't get your closure. I agree with you that you just want to find some answers to what was done or not done. I think you are very very brave; I think your actions towards this gets you out your head, out of the inertia ... the feeling of being helpless against what happened. Acting on something can be powerful and even if nothing happens, you know you tried your very best. I do think you will get SOME knowledge that you didn't have before other than then the recent fact that the letter was never sent. Squeak Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted October 29, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 29, 2009 Thanks Squeakybird and Lavender. I'll keep you all updated. I spoke to my Dad today which means that nothing has happened with the police yet. xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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