Dyin To Eat

[complicated]

just lay here thinkin i need to keep using the forums to be able to get to know some people coz i drift off an try an go in the chat room an then feel like shit coz i dont know anyone, plus i keep forgetting who writes the great replies to my posts so anyway im sticking with the forums for abit an see if i can meet people on my wave length. im so scared right now all im thinking is eat eat eat, ive been pretty hyper for ages an im scared yo come down.

in the past ive been so on the ball about myself ive known what to do an when to do it but it feels like ive forgotton how to look after myself an its scaring me like imscared that just coming to bed an just lying here isant the right thing to do to try an ground myself, i feel really frightened an alone but having here to come to gives me some comfort, im just scared ill never calm down,that my heads gona start racing an ill panic like i used to do years ago when i was drinking feeling out of control, not being able to calm down coz i was scarred what might happen/

anyway like i said at least i have here to come to, beating myself up now for doing something good for myself an reaching out for help, cant win oh well xxx

[Sammy]

((((((((((((complicated))))))))))))))) well done for saying how you are feeling, I know it can be hard sometimes but you did the right thing, I hope others come along with some great advice for you, I'm not good with words right now but I am thinking of you and hope you continue to post. xxxx