stardust1982 Posted January 30, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 30, 2010 sioux i was showing offline but he kept inboxing me MUCH ANNOYING i've sorted it out now though i've told him that i dont like talking to him via fb as he's an idiot who cant spell which didnt go down too well but at least he's stopped lol kate xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
out2lunch Posted January 31, 2010 Report Share Posted January 31, 2010 lol couldn't spell ~ have you seen how I spelt Knightmare last night? haha. hope the blind date goes well dudey!! xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardust1982 Posted January 31, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2010 so do i! i need some good things to happen as do we all huh? kate xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardust1982 Posted February 4, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 4, 2010 well what a lovely sunny week ........NOT docs on monday he's reducing my meds fortnightly so he can put me on something else which sounds okay its just i'm already experiencing withdrawal symptoms counselling on tuesday was really tough broke down and asked my mum of i can move home she said yes but only as a temporary measure it was one of the hardest things i have ever asked of her and now i feel stupid i cancelled my date yesterday because i was so scared and feel so rubbish i'm really down to the point i have deactivated my facebook account and told my 3 best friends that i need to be left alone so they have left me alone .....i didnt mean it and now feel too stupid to ask them for their help my ex boyfriend has tb and i'm scraed for him but he has a new girlfriend and everytime we have text each other the last few days (we're still kinda friends) he's been cooking for her NOT HAPPY there's other shit going on too i feel like a sponge absorbing it all but eventually i'm going to be saturated then what happens i always joke that i have the crazies but at the moment i feel like i'm actually going big time crazy my sister just called and asked me to babysit my nephew at her house saturaday night i'm happy to do it but i feel so crap and he has quite a few behavioural issues that i'm not sure i'll cope what if he has a tantrum how will i cope what if i cry that won't solve his tantrum i dont know what to do and no one can help i have to deal with all this stuff and i cant my mum keeps telling me3 that she felt like this and still had to deal with 3 kids she's not me she's stronger and calmer than me i'm a disater pathertic and pointless i give up but that will have to wait till after sunday my nephew needs me but after that i'm going to go away for little while i'll come back i'm too scared to die but i dont need to stick around here anymore theres no point one of my friends live in norfolk i'll go there she knows everything about me she'll keep me safe laters kate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
out2lunch Posted February 5, 2010 Report Share Posted February 5, 2010 hey dude, sorry I replied yesterday but my internet has been on the blink all week and kept losing signal somewhere and it doesn't seem to have got through. I know it's hard, but I think it's very brave of you to talk to your mum about moving back in and at least you'll have a roof over your head babe. How's things with your friends? Have you contacted any to explain you were just having a funny 5 minutes? I hope so, and at least one of them should understand surely? Babe I know it must feel like everythings gone tits up, and maybe it has, but you are not useless you are a strong and brave person who is going through a really shitty time at the moment, please don't give in,you have to stay and fight. did you speak to your friend in Norfolk? Is that an option for you? Hope your keeping safe lovely, looking forward to hearing from you. Kazza xxxxxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardust1982 Posted February 6, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 6, 2010 no one is even replying to my texts now .....guess thier busy can't go to norfolk not enough money to get there i really want to go away cancelled babysitting today cause i dont want to do it today and my sister has copped big time i was looking forward to seeing my nephew but i'm too miserable thank you for replying i'll be ok xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardust1982 Posted February 8, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2010 my sister had a massive cop at my mum for me not babysitting even though i had a migraine and i have a throat infection caused by an infected wisdom tooth i really dont think looking after an energetic 6 year old with behavioural difficulties in that state would even be possible!!!!! so all the good work me and my sister had done to get our relationship back on track has been destroyed!!! on a good note one of best friends is coming over for casserole tomorrow night and i'm going to the cinema with her and her sisters wednesday i'm very brasic but i dont mind going without some of my other treats for a night out and my blind date has been rescheduled for friday he knows all about my problems and still seems interested neither of us are looking for a relationship as such but it will be fun while we figure out what we do want lol ;-) so things seem to be looking up a bit got a lot to sort out still with my living situation etc but i'm feeling a little better i guess being poorly made me realise it can't get a lot worse without me actually going insane lol thanks for all your support kazza :-) and if you ever need some kind words dont forget to give me a shout huh? kate xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
out2lunch Posted February 8, 2010 Report Share Posted February 8, 2010 hey that's great Kate, amazing how having plans with friends really lifts you ~ well it does me for sure. And how cool is your blind date guy?? even if neither of you wants a relationship, it's always ace to meet new people and if you get a new friend out of it, hurrha!! Hope you have a lovely time with your friends, and don't forget to let us know how the blind date goes!! Love Kazza xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardust1982 Posted February 11, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 11, 2010 lots been going on..... jen came round for dinner on tuesday and we've made plans for next week!!!! date is tomorrow morning at a coffee shop outfit and flat are both tiptop (just in case it goes VERY well) spoke to my aunt yesterday and my cousin is pregnant so the whole family is in very high spirits me and my sister are patched up again my aunt is a berevement counsellor and is going to help me build a support network through groups and meeting so when at 11pm i'm crying and can't call anyone cause their all busy or asleep i'll have a few more options FANTASTIC bit down in the dumps which is why i haven't been on here much which sounds silly cause everything is quite positive but i still feel rubbish in general and still getting over infections and things i'm not going to let it get me down more than i am though my counsellor is off next week so my aunt has offered to take me out for lunch and we're going to start going for walks soon right i'm off i feel like i've written an essay felt i should write good things here as well as bad!!! Kate xxx ps: lavender candles my new destressor :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
out2lunch Posted February 11, 2010 Report Share Posted February 11, 2010 Kate that's fucking brilliant mate!!! am so so pleased for you, date ~ great! clean flat ~ great! Cool Aunt helping you ~ great! patched up with sister ~ GREAT!!! XXXXXXXXXXXX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardust1982 Posted February 11, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 11, 2010 every time i see you've made a comment kazza i end up laughing to myself thanks chuck saw your post on my profile cheers HERE'S TO HAVING A SMILE ON YOUR FACE AND LAUGHTER REALLY BEING THE BEST MEDICINE i'm holding my cuppa up to happiness and luck to all on this forum (and its just a straight cuppa nothing alchomolic in it!!!!) i'm so hyper about tomorrow lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
out2lunch Posted February 12, 2010 Report Share Posted February 12, 2010 lol.. sorry dude but anyone who states that their tea has nothing "alchomolic" in, is clearly monstrously shitfaced!!! Hurrah for good days xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
floyd Posted February 13, 2010 Report Share Posted February 13, 2010 :rolleyes: i dont mean this to sound patronising but ur totally alone if that helps coz im in excatly the same situation xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarabpd Posted February 13, 2010 Report Share Posted February 13, 2010 I know how unhappy is that reply ((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))) to them both Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardust1982 Posted February 13, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 13, 2010 it wa\s straight :-) i dont drink it did however have honey in it SUGAR RUSH :-) somthing to cheer us all up i went shopping and bought new shoes with my grocery money but they are so beautiful :-) ummmma i'm naughty but sometimes its all i can do btw i'm going to the docs this week as i think i may be manic which meanss.......i'm bipolar so hopefully i'm manic enough to get a diagnosis its a shame though cause i was hoping i'm getting better my behaviour says otherwise love to you all :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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