Katherine Posted April 5, 2005 Report Share Posted April 5, 2005 can you help catch me BEFORE I fall???? I'm not sure why, I'm feeling sad this morning. I'm feeling a bit invisible and unnoticed here. Not sure if it is an irrational feeling based in BPD stuff or that I've 'said or done something' that has made most people turn their backs on me. I'm thinking that sometimes one has to be *in crisis* or humourous or outspoken to be noticed?????? And I am asserting MYSELF and my need for help with things, important issues in my life, and its the same as it 'always was' in my life---feeling unseen and not able to make myself understood. (re planned visit to GP)Also the quotes I posted. And because I still haven't got any further in my quest to volunteer for here I'm feeling rejected again because of my inadequecies....when I clearly am adequate at work. Its making me reconsider--maybe its not so important for me to volunteer at all. Hell, I DON'T KNOW. 13 days to go of therapy break. Today is the *half way* point. relief. It still feels a long way to go, and am daunted that I am only half way, though in some way this half feels shorter, because there's not the Easter holiday weekend like there was last week. I've got to go and get ready for work now. Tired. Sore throat, possible cystitis (somatising.) karie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracey Posted April 5, 2005 Report Share Posted April 5, 2005 ((((((Karie)))))) here to catch you! not to good at catching but i will give it my best shot just for you hun you dont need to be in crisis or bad day i look forward to reading your posts though i might not reply to all of them! sorry!!! well done for getting to the half way mark! hopefully the next 13 days will go quicker than the last! please feel free to post as much as you want pm me if it helps! here for you take care hun Traceyxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calyps Posted April 5, 2005 Report Share Posted April 5, 2005 MASSIVE HUGS Karie, I've been told i throw mean like a boy but I'm not sure how well I catch but goddammit if i ain't gonna give it a try! You don't have to 'do' anything to be noticed, you just be you, the wonderful insightful karie! I too have MAJOR reservations about volunteering (much self-doubt) but just by posting here and helping all of us you're doing something. So sorry you woke feeling sad- was it a dream you had? It will pass petal, just hang on in there with us, I'm going to put my sensible head on and read your GP posts- hopefully I can come up with something remotely helpful to you. Anwen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lauren Posted April 5, 2005 Report Share Posted April 5, 2005 ((((((karie))))))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Posted April 5, 2005 Report Share Posted April 5, 2005 Sorry, Not really responding to much at all at the moment. Can't deal with any of the pain and sadness on these boards right now. But I am reading everything and relating to it all. I feel unable to offer help, and when I am in crisis I just disappear from here anyway, I find it impossible to ask anyone for help. Ever. I wish I could help more but, I feel quite useless, apart from suggesting people get out and exercise and get fresh air.......Which isn't everyone's cup of tea... But I do care, deeply about everyone, but it all just makes me so sad. :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Betsy Posted April 5, 2005 Report Share Posted April 5, 2005 Karie, You are a valued member here. If you didn't get much response to posts it may not be you as much as others. Right now you are looking through things with the"depression" glasses on. That always makes things screwy (I know cause i do it myslef) It's hard when your therapist is gone... they are you reality check, your grounding point, and your security. I think you have done really well making it thus far. Try and start a project that you want to get done before the therapist comes back or just use your distraction techniques as best you can. feeling for you((((((((((( karie ))))))))))))))))))))))) bets Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 5, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 5, 2005 ((((((((((everyone)))))))))---esp Bets, Claire, Extinct, Anwen, Tracey)))) I went to work today, did the whole day---with sore throat and temperature I guess I am LOW all round.I had a cold at the end of March which ahsn't completely gone, I still get sudden fits of coughing at most inconvenient times) I feel like a little girl who wants a cuddle, her head held.... Bets you are totally right about my therapist being my reality checking ground.....my own reality check switch is very very slow... I have bits of projects....maybe they need more cohesion... Anwen, right now I don't remember my dream, but I really hope it comes back to me because that could really help. I WAS feeling in lost in snowstorm alone feeling last night before I went to sleep... Tracey, thanks for affirming and reassuring me....I need to use my voice, as I have read that a cough is a symbolic sign that one needs to be listened to....I still have a cough. Claire- fresh air is good...blossom trees are even better...have to go on a long walk soon to find out where my new therapy venue will be... Extinct....hug much appreciated... Karie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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