Advice Please

[mbtm]

hi,

i realised a couple of years ago that i have bpd. however, i have been frightened to go to the doctors, mainly because i have children and from some of the stuff i have read about bpd mothers i am terrified of where this would lead in terms of potential social work intervention or getting my kids taken off me. i do have problems with my eldest daughter who i have sought and received family counselling for, but manage my other kids fine.

when i realised i had bpd i got myself private cbt counselling, but because of the expense was unable to keep it up. the counsellor also gave me the impression that being labelled bpd wouldn't necessarily be of benefit to me and i should try to work on the specific symptoms. when i stopped this counselling i spoke to my parish priest who put me in touch with catholic counselling, where i received some counselling in anger management at reduced cost. the volunteer counsellor had no knowledge of bpd and although i had quite a few sessions i didn't really find it of much benefit. i have also spoken with the resident counsellor at my doctor's surgery - where i was referred due to the problems i had been experiencing with my doctor, and it was good to talk and he gave me a couple of relaxation cd's, but this was before i had knowledge of bpd.

i have also bought a couple of self help books (the angry heart), and a cbt one. i think the main thing here is though is time and motivation. although i have started out with them on a couple of occasions i don't have the time or discipline to continue. as well as having kids i also have a full time job and other stuff always sometimes ends up taking precedence.

i feel however unable to cope with this on my own. 10 days ago i went to the doctors and although never told him i thought i had bpd i did discuss my anger and depression with him. he put me on 20mg/day of prozac. i asked him about psychiatric help but he reckoned that was not an option - although with me pushing him a bit said he would enquire about any local cbt therapy available.

what i wanted to know from people here is any recommendations for private psychiatrists or counsellors who deal with

bpd in lanarkshire. i feel it would help me a lot just to talk to someone who has knowledge of this and who can help me come to terms with it a bit. any help/advice greatly appreciated.

[tissuesanissues]

Hi and welcome mbtm.

To answer your question, there is a link at the top i think which has a list of therapists, so I imagine that should help regrading the therapist you seek.

I think it was really good that you opened up a bit more to your gp about how bad you are actually feeling, but if you do suffer from bpd as you believe then you should try to be a bit firmer when askin for a referral. CBT has been known to be helpful for bdp sufferers, so I hope that goes through okay., but im no way an expert and DBT i think is specifically designed for bpd too.

I hope you find what you are looking for, and this place is an archive of good advice and lots of friendly support too x

[mbtm]

thanks

[just.me]

Hi there, getting a diagnosis would help you, CBT is the wrong therapy as it is too short term if you get it free you only get 6 to 12 sessions, whereby DBT is an hour a week and a few hours group therapy and lasts around a year.

Providing your children are well cared for i.e not in danger there is no reason not to get a diagnosis, Social Services are not told you have BPD. Social Services are only ever called in if they get a report about you bad parenting.

All teenagers specially girls go through the terrible child phase, my neices were absolute bitches for 5 years, I am so glad I have boys.

Try to get yourself to the doctors, get a referral and get yourself help.

[bibiddi]

If CBT is available, I would take it.

The thing with therapy is that you have to be in the right emotional place to gain benefit from it.

CBT may offer you some ways of dealing with issues. DBT may offer some more.

It may be that CBT will be enough to keep you out of crisis.

There are more than these two types of therapy, all working in different ways.

If one therapy doesn't seem to work for you try a different type.

link to BPS list of psychologists.

I hope you find help. Good luck.