Katherine Posted April 13, 2005 Report Share Posted April 13, 2005 I woke up screaming again....from a dream in which I was angry with my father for killing off the top of my plant, an umbrella tree. I was raging at him and he took hold of the top of my head and pushed it down towards the chair. Then I woke up screaming. Third dream in the past week in which screaming has featured. The other 2 dreams are * I was attacked and smothered. Woke up screaming. * Was at a workshop to open my voval cords. Chose to do that by screaming. each group presented a production. So did my group. But noone clapped ours because basicaly all happened was I screamed. Everyone went off with no acknowledgement or response. And then today's dream, as above. I'm not really sure why I am screaming so much...and am concerned its like, happening so frequently. All I can think of is the depth of the rawness of my feelings. Has anyone had screaming episodes in dreams or otherwise? What was it like? Its all so exhausting.... ((4 days to go now...)) Hopefully, Kari Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTBadBug Posted April 13, 2005 Report Share Posted April 13, 2005 Hi Karie, it is not something I have had experience of, but, I hope it stops soon as it can't be very pleasant. Do take care and I hope to catch up with you later, Jane xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swan Posted April 13, 2005 Report Share Posted April 13, 2005 Dreams where I want to scream and can't - wake up terrified, sweating and shaking. Definitely for me about fear of my feelings and chaos inside Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 13, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 13, 2005 screaming to be heard. screaming in the hope of being heard. noone sees my wistful tears. and the feelings that I am a failure, despite all my experience.ashamed I would have trained as a teacher, yoga teacher, temporary trainee therapist (for 3 years)....to end up HERE. bottom of the pile. exhausted. alone. still. it just isn't worth trying much any more. noone wants what I have to offer. k. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 13, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 13, 2005 anxious and shaking. trying to calm down. doing wordsearches. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swan Posted April 13, 2005 Report Share Posted April 13, 2005 ((((((((((((((((((Kari))))))))))))))) You have a lot to offer. But right now you need to use it for yourself, to look after yourself and find out what YOUR purpose for being here is. I don't think anyone is immune to this, and you can be the Princess of Wales and still feel that no one wants you or that you have nothing to offer. Sorry I wasn't here earlier - please don't feel alone with this, we're here. Love Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 13, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 13, 2005 thanks ((((((Swan))))))) that encouragement, reassurance and validation helps me to feel a little even more betterer its still not easy for me to look after me...I'll get there tho.. k. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wisdom Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 There is a medication being used that has been very successful here in the usa. Some doctors are still very conservative to use it. The medication is referred to as "Periaction". Peraction is bascially used for folks with severe nightmares that at times are debilitating. Periaction has been proven to be effective amongst combat/war experiences and shown to be affective amongst victims/survivors. I have a long history of Peraction. I took the medication for almost 2 years. Working thru my nightmares in a clinical setting proved to be futile. I now manage my stressors. About the only thing I can do is wait for a treament that cures........ Karie, your not alone with the nightime screaming. I hope that maybe you choose to share your dreams with your doc if you haven't already done so. Maybe he/she can suggest something. Either way..............your very safe. It was only a dream.......regardless of how vivid. Take good care of yourself. Wiz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 14, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 thanks Wis....I see my therapist on Monday (HHHHOOOOORRRRAAAYYY!!) and can talk about it there...She is very good with that kind of thing....She has had some body psychotherapy training as well as an analytic background, so screaming etc in therapy is ok...I have no external outlet for my emotions right now... and then Efexor is imprinting itself on an already vivid unconscious... Also I see my GP tomorrow so I can talk about it with her too...tho my therapist has the overall responsibility for my care.. Periaction sounds interesting...If these dreams go on I'm going to HAVE to do something...I need a rest. Its reassuring to know I am not alone hugs, Kari Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktodee_27 Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 Your not alone Kari with the screaming thing either. I have woken up from dreams before like that. Terrifying to a T and scary. Or even if the door bell rings and I'm sleeping on the couch, I just automatically scream 24/7 if I hear a doorbell or a voice or someone come in while I'm sleeping,(my worker) or if someone comes by my door when I am awake and I'm not expecting it. Like when my boyfriend comes or anyone else and I don't expect it and he yells, "hunny!" or knocks or rings. I've jumped many times and screamed and he's had to give me hugs and calm me down and soothe me since I was so frightened and startled. I've done it for years basically. Or people look at me funny if its a stranger and I have to make up some dumb thing to justify it. Or they laugh. Or staff has to sit and soothe me. It's nuts. Think its definitely a result of my trauma. You hit the nail on the head to when its exhausting. LOL, definitely. Glad I'm not the only one who experiences this either since I felt like the lone freak for awhile there. Take care Kari U'll make it. I promise Katie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 (((((((Katie)))))) Thanks...I had another one last night (earlier this night lol!) I don't remember what it was about now tho. I am so t i r e d ....... love, Kari Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alexa Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 I often wake up screaming, my "family" go mad lol xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 ((((((Alexa)))))) why would your 'family' go mad? My flatmates haven't heard me yet...they always say that they are totally deep in sleep, and that my room seems to be very soundproof. not sure what to say about that.. Kari Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 This sounds to me like 'night terrors'. My husband has it everynight. He doesn't scream but he sits up suddenly and shouts at someone or something. Or sometimes he runs over to the window, and flings back the curtains. Everynow and then he backs away from me in bed and says 'who are you? what are you doing here?'. Each time he is totally terrified, but still 'asleep', then he calms down, and wakes up, lies back down and starts snoring again. Leaving me completely terrified!!!! But night terrors isn't always like this, sometimes you can wake yourself up screaming, and the terror stays with you. I dunno but it does sound like you may have this. x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyMacbeth Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 I used to suffer from night terrors. I would wake up screaming and shaking. My parents could never wake me up. They said it was terrifying. I used to have them for years. Most of the dreams I cannot remember but one in particular I do. I do go through periods now where I do have horrible nightmares. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 hm....I wonder.... *Kari researches on internet and in books and will get back on this* I reckon mainly that I need to scream someplace where it can be heard and accepted and understood..like in therapy... (watch out London on Monday, in that case..) K. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 Yes, I believe that it is very, very deep seated worry which comes out at night. In the form of extreme fear and terror. It's truly scary to watch, and utterly terrifying for the poor sufferer. I have watched my hubbie sit up, and look at something, following it with his eyes out of the room with such fear in his face, it has chilled my blood to ice. bloody scary! :wacko: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 ((((((Claire)))))) I remember my dreams (hardly surprising for someone who has worked with her dreams for 11 years)and am 'conscious'. k. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 Whatever it is, it sounds awful. Maybe it's because you are desperately trying to be heard, but you feel that no one is listening or capable of understanding. So you are frustrated and afraid you will never be able to tell your story. Maybe you need Primal scream therapy? Not sure what it is, but it most involve alot of screaming and letting off steam! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 from www.stanford.edu What are Night Terrors? Night Terrors ar characterized by a sudden arousal from slow wave sleep with a piercing scream or cry, accompanied by autonomic (Controlled by the part of the nervous system that regulates motor functions of the heart, lungs, etc.) and behavioral manifestations of intense fear. Also known as Pavor Nocturnus, incubus, severe autonomic discharge, sleep terror. What are the symptoms of Night Terrors? A sudden episode of intense terror during sleep The episodes usually occur within the first third of the night Partial or total amnesia occurs for the events during the episode. Associated features include: Polysomnographic monitoring demonstrates the onset of episodes during stage 3 or 4 sleep Tachycardia (rapid beating of the heart) usually occurs in association with the episodes. Other medical disorders are not the cause of the episode, e.g., epilepsy Other sleep disorders can be present, e.g., nightmares, sleep panic attacks, sleep apnea. How serious are Night Terrors? Some adults have episodes of night terror that may occur less than once per month, and do not result in harm to the individual or others. Some adults experience episodes less than once per week, and it does not result in harm to the individual or others. In its severest form, the episodes occur almost nightly, or are associated with physical injury to the individual or others. If injuries are occuring, it is important to consult a sleep specialist. Night terrors in adults is not normal. Children generally have them, but they ten to grow out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 ok, thought I'd just share that... Claire, now to your post....I think you are 'spot on'......... Its definitely a primal scream...I have loadsa primal issues....think I'll stick with my therapist though.....cos I know if I need to scream she'll be 'all ears' as it were....sort of..... Though when I'm in therapy cos she's there in the room with me I usually feel safe and no need to scream.... ???/ watch this space.... Kari Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 ok, more info.....then I'll be quiet! When a child is experiencing a night terror and actually remembers it, he or she later reports dreams that are extremely threatening. The content has to do with some predatory person or animal chasing them, or terrible fears of abandonment such as their parents being killed. Some adults who suffer them and seem to have greater recall speak of ceilings and walls pushing down on them, and others report snakes and spiders slithering and crawling all over the bed or room. In fact, in a study of the relationship between parasomnias and psychiatric illness in a very large sample of adults, Dr. Maurice Ohayon and his colleagues at the Phillipe Pinel Research Center in Montreal reported a strong association between the adults who experienced night terrors and those diagnosed with bipolar disorders and depression co-morbid with anxiety. from Bipolarchild.com :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 hmmmm, interesting. I know that my hubbie is fine, he is very chilled out. Though he has a stressful job. He has had night terrors all his life, and laughs it off c'os he is not aware of it. Many times I will tell him about it the next day and he can't remember, yet I have led there awake thinking he can see something I can't see. He had sleep walking issues as well when he was younger. Once he woke up hanging onto a window ledge by his fingers and let go........ landing on the patio below. miraculously breaking not much (just his nose). Most of the time though I think there is major trauma going on underneath the surface, for people who suffer night terrors. Obviously though it has been driven very, very deep within. I wonder what it is like to drive to a deserted spot and just scream at the top of your lungs!! kind of exciting I reckon!!!!! What a buzz!! :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Posted April 15, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 yep...I have a friend who used to dig holes and scream down them. (there's a shortage of deserted places in NW London....Hampstead Heath is a bit exposed...!!!!) I wonder if my therapist's house is terraced, semi detached or detached!!!! The centre where we worked up until March was SUPPOSED to be soundproofed, but certainly wasn't cos I regularly heard other's emotional expressions... (now here's me now going into all kinds of fantasies like does she have a cat? I've already pondered over whether the chair will be cosy or comfy or whatnot...I'm hoping for a sofa with lots of cushions and blankets..and god help me she better have a good supply of tissues in....) k. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Posted April 16, 2005 Report Share Posted April 16, 2005 I'd love to scream my head off!! But like you say, there is no where really to do it. I get it all out in the same sort of way, but by doing it differently. Very often I will do kickboxing with pads, and 'heavy bags' where you can punch and kick the fuck out of 'em (as long as you know how to punch and kick without hurting yourself!) it's great. I really believe it's why boxers love to box. Gets all the aggression and pain out. You feel amazing afterwards.. Nothing like venting it all out with a pair of boxing gloves on and someone willing to hold the pads!! :rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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