Reputation System

[Hayz]

Hey there Cherry, seems we have got off on wrong foot a bit. I didn't mean anyone else had used my account, I meant that the only time I did any of the reputation marking was today. So all the comments in the other threads about this whole reputation thing saying that people were playing games and negatively marking anonymously and trying to upset people and what not, well it wasn't me doing any anonymous marks and I just wanted to make that clear as since I posted here saying why I'd marked negatively today, I didn't want anyone thinking it had been me previously. I don't believe in playing mind games with people, I think it is deceitful, hurtful and an unnecassary waste of time and energy when people can be kind and helpful to each other instead. I'm now wishing I'd not done any of the marks I did today as well, it's just not me really and I don't judge people in general and that, I guess, is what this whole reputation thing is, a judgement on people's character and how they post, how they word their replies.

I do think that now that it's not anonymous the reputation marking, that instead of it stopping the people who were just willy nilly handing out negative marks to people they didn't like or had a grudge against, that now the people who maybe have legitimate and healthier reasons for negatively marking something will keep quiet for fear of tit for tat repercusions and fallings out. Unfortunately on large forums such as this, I think that with so many different personalities on here that there will always be fallings out and people left hurt and angry or upset. Some shake that off better than others.

I know that for me, I came to this site to learn from others how they deal with their mental health issues and if and when I felt ready, I'd pop up and say something as I'm not the most confident of people. I'm one of those softly softly people and get anxious around aggressive behaviour either physical or verbal and am easily intimidated. All I can do is try my best to overcome those fears and we are all different.

I can say that I DO respect everyone here, I may be anxious around certain people's postings and how they word things but that's my thing to get over and I'll try.

I think it's a lot to do with give and take, there's going to be things that Joshua and others may decide is best for the forums and not everyone may like it. You can say that about anything in life though but there has to be give and take and inevitably not all of the people will be happy all of the time.

At the end of the day, everyone has their problems, everyone has their reasons for coming here and if people really are SO upset about the running of the forums, then there's always the option of not signing in here anymore and finding other online support.

Sorry that I went on and on and I still don't think I explained myself as I wanted to. What is in my head makes perfect sense to me but between there and what is coming out onto here is getting a bit muddled en route. I do apologise!!!

"At the end of the day, everyone has their problems, everyone has their reasons for coming here and if people really are SO upset about the running of the forums, then there's always the option of not signing in here anymore and finding other online support."

That would be slightly hard if you have been coming here for over 2 years like me and have made many of friends and use this website everyday unlike you have only been here since this year.

[sanctuary]

Then i havent achieved what i set out to do. Its not about stopping people from being negative. Positive and negative feedback is what this system is about and all of us having a bit of insight into how others around us perceive us.

I couldn't be more divided on this. I think everything in this whole fucking world is open to abuse.... but it seems there is still something 'missing' from your masterplan josh... perhaps you need some of your own insight yourself? Or maybe perspective... all I know is it hasn't been thought through very wisely... there ya go.. some reputation feedback without using the system... lol. Use it!

[jillv]

Thank you Josh for listening to our comcerns and taking steps to try and improve the reputation system.

However, I do still have some concerns about it. Time will tell if the system will run without too many people being upset by it.

[chorse_70]

I have never really understood what it even means? But lets say someone finds a Mod or a Supervisor to not be helpful in a certain situation and they give them negative points. can the mod or supervisor see who gave them these points and be nasty to them because of it or take it out on them in anyway? Can just a member see who has gave them a negative mark? First of all this is a Mental Health support site not a site where we get to vote on who we like and who we don't. I already have enough problems in the real world wondering who hates me and who doesn't? There are some members here that have bad days and what if alot of people get together and give them negative votes then what happens? Are they kicked off the site for a while? No one here is perfect,we all have bad days and good. In my opinion the only good that will come out of this is getting rid of Trolls who constantly cause trouble.

[treadgently]

Cherry,

I wasn't implying it would be easy, I just meant that if anyone was so unhappy with how things are here, then rather than make themselves miserable then consider other support elsewhere. If you're lucky enough to have friends here then that's great and obviously this is a good place for you.

I think you are attacking me for no good reason, you practically accused me of having being one of the people (presuming there was more than one as there often is) who had been anonymously voting negatively against people before the voting was tied to the person who gave the vote.

Because I'm new and you're not, I'm seen as the outcast. No one really knows me here whereas they do here and it's hard for me to open up and allow people to see who I am. Now that this voting system is in place, I think it favours the people who have been here ages and not newbies. Like you criticised me for only having been here since this year........ you just proved my point in that it's harder for new people. It should not matter that I've only been here since this year, I thought that everyone had a fair chance for support, friendships and help here.

I've done nothing to you to provoke anything and I feel hurt that you're condemning me before you even know anything about me.

I'm not going to leave the forums just because you may not like me for no good reason. I've done nothing but be calm and level with you Cherry, I don't know what's going on here.

Take care of yourself.

[Joshua]

can the mod or supervisor see who gave them these points and be nasty to them because of it or take it out on them in anyway?

I am confident that the team I have embrace feedback and will not behave in a way you suggest.

[Hayz]

Cherry,

I wasn't implying it would be easy, I just meant that if anyone was so unhappy with how things are here, then rather than make themselves miserable then consider other support elsewhere. If you're lucky enough to have friends here then that's great and obviously this is a good place for you.

I think you are attacking me for no good reason, you practically accused me of having being one of the people (presuming there was more than one as there often is) who had been anonymously voting negatively against people before the voting was tied to the person who gave the vote.

Because I'm new and you're not, I'm seen as the outcast. No one really knows me here whereas they do here and it's hard for me to open up and allow people to see who I am. Now that this voting system is in place, I think it favours the people who have been here ages and not newbies. Like you criticised me for only having been here since this year........ you just proved my point in that it's harder for new people. It should not matter that I've only been here since this year, I thought that everyone had a fair chance for support, friendships and help here.

I've done nothing to you to provoke anything and I feel hurt that you're condemning me before you even know anything about me.

I'm not going to leave the forums just because you may not like me for no good reason. I've done nothing but be calm and level with you Cherry, I don't know what's going on here.

Take care of yourself.

HI, i think we have missunderstood eachother....shall we just forget it all and start a clean sheet ?

take care x

[treadgently]

Cherry,

Of course we can. I'd like that very much Seems tedious to squabble over nothing. I hope you have a good day today and Good Morning lol.

Take care of yourself xxxxxxxxxxx

[Hayz]

Cherry,

Of course we can. I'd like that very much Seems tedious to squabble over nothing. I hope you have a good day today and Good Morning lol.

Take care of yourself xxxxxxxxxxx

brilliant good morning 2 u 2 xxxxxxxxxxxx

[roseyleeee]

I am very sorry but i just do not agree with the reputation system. I feel gutted. I have read and re-read and re-read the posts i have made. I cannot see the number in the corner were it tells me someone has voted negative one. I cannot see why in my posts i have been voted -1. Can someone please read all my posts and tell me what i have done. I am now back to neutral but i must have done something wrong. If i was an animal in the wild i would have died by natural selection. I am useless at everything even on a mental health forum which is where i am meant to be safe. I don't undserstand truly. Please help someone. I had a bad experience on friday yet again and my whole confidence is shaken i just need some help. Sorry again. i am sorry. I hope i don't annoy anyone with this post. OMG someone is going to hate this post. aaargh. This is so difficult i don't even know whether to post it now.

[treadgently]

I am very sorry but i just do not agree with the reputation system. I feel gutted. I have read and re-read and re-read the posts i have made. I cannot see the number in the corner were it tells me someone has voted negative one. I cannot see why in my posts i have been voted -1. Can someone please read all my posts and tell me what i have done. I am now back to neutral but i must have done something wrong. If i was an animal in the wild i would have died by natural selection. I am useless at everything even on a mental health forum which is where i am meant to be safe. I don't undserstand truly. Please help someone. I had a bad experience on friday yet again and my whole confidence is shaken i just need some help. Sorry again. i am sorry. I hope i don't annoy anyone with this post. OMG someone is going to hate this post. aaargh. This is so difficult i don't even know whether to post it now.

Roseyleeee,

There is at least one certain member on these forums causing trouble. I have seen this member vote negatively on more than one person's post (not just yours which I now notice has been removed to a neutral no votes on your post again) and done so in a manner in which to upset and wind the person up. I am so sorry that it has got you in so much distress but your reaction is normal and I hope you will still come here and reach out and NOT be put off by immature member/s whose intent it is to cause problems. You have NOTHING to be sorry for, I did see the post of yours that was voted negatively BUT I won't name the member who did it as I do not want to be accused of "shit stirring" and I just want to keep my head down and keep out of any back stabbing and animosity. I can tell you though, that it was NOTHING in your post that warranted the negative mark and as it has now been removed, I'd really advise you to think nothing of it again and try to push it out of your mind as someone who is just playing games and hasn't got the emotional capability to be kind and understanding of others feelings.

Hmmmm, now why do my posts always come out as gobbledegook? It makes sense in my head and then as I said on another post I made lately, something bizarre happens en route to here and I think I have typing gremlins lol.

Take really good care of yourself and please know, there are GOOD people here and you are most definitely one of them.

Lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[treadgently]

Joshua,

I'm not meaning to be disrespectful, but please can you see the distress the reputation system is causing? Maybe it's been tried for long enough now to draw the conclusion that the general consensus is that it is doing more harm than good. I've seen countless posts now of members distressed at the voting and causing problems to their self esteem and mental health and surely that's something we're trying to avoid? Surely there are other tools that could be installed other than this one that would serve a similar purpose to you were hoping for? What, I'm not sure but it just seems clear this one is not achieving anything positive.

Thanks for listening.

[Corpsewithpulse]

Another very strong shout for scrapping the scheme altogether.

It's the job of the mods to detect and remove trolls and trollish behaviour. We are here to support eachother, not to police and castigate others.

[roseyleeee]

Thank you. I am trying to relax about it, but i will keep checking and checking to make sure what i am saying is ok.

[pepsimeg]

i do not like the repustation system either, surely u can see by ppls posts that they are giving good or neg feed back without the point scoring......

ahhh well i guess its hard to try to please everyone ;)

[just.me]

I don't even look at mine now! I would hope that should anybody feel my posts were not helpful they would contact me to discuss what I had written.

I would never deem it acceptable for any member including myself to be nasty to someone who had voted their post a negative. We all have different opinions, moral guidelines, and illnesses. We have different personalities and come from all walks of life. I do not believe that if a post is negatived it is done out of malice, but just as a feedback to that member on how their post was perceived on that particular thread.

If I talk bullshit I want to know!

Should any member feel the system is being abused, please submit a ticket and any situation can be reviewed.

Use your votes wisely!

[hummm_mabbe]

There is an important point, and its been touched on above

When someone votes your post down, if the system is designed to help us understand how we affect others, how can we know what our effect on other people is if all we have is a red number? If the user leaves no feedback as to what it is you have done to offend or upset, you can sit there guessing all day as to what you may or may not need to change about yourself.

Sitting and worrying what you have done wrong to upset others, when you may have done nothing at all, has a name. Its called 'rumination' - and people pay therapists many thousands of pounds a year to help them STOP it. A therapist will also empathically and sympathetically draw attention to any behavioural issues the person may have that makes them more prone to upsetting outcomes. In here all you have is the number and the vague sense that you have been slapped in a drive by.

If we are now discouraging people from pursuing others to find out why they voted them down, then it really is a fantasy that this system could ever do 'what it says on the tin'. You cannot learn your behavioural blindspots unless they are explicitly demonstrated to you, and even then its very hard to listen unless its done sensitively.

In terms of a psychological experiment, I cant see that its really yielding any useful data. From the point of psychotherapy and recovery, it definitely does not seem to be having useful outcomes and its hard to see how it will - though I can understand the desire to stick with a decision and see it to its end. As the site is recovery focused, then surely the measure of any system designed to promote recovery is that it accomplishes that. For those that maybe COULD benefit from greater insight, the system seems to be ignored or rationalised away - it just bumps up against their already considerable defences. Whilst I agree that behavioural and emotional awareness, as well as limit setting are important parts of therapy for personality disorders, I cant help but feel this is not the way to do it.

The closest thing I have seen to an online blind spots awareness tool is the 'nohari window', and that at least includes verbal feedback. That said, its not for the faint hearted.

Ross

[Joshua]

The system allows for members to give positive or negative points based on their topics or replies. The system also allows for us to see who gave us this feedback, so if we wish we may contact them and simply ask – What did you find unhelpful in my post/topic? What do you think I may have done differently? The system also allows us to see overall by our score how people are affected by us. A higher score would indicate that people believe your topics or posts to be generally helpful to others.

Ruminating about ones score is obviously an issue for the individual and likely to be one that affects their life as a whole rather than in this one scenario. In that case help may be sought for this problem.

I don’t discourage members from contacting others to find out “why they voted them down” in fact quite the opposite; I encourage members to contact each other about both positive and negative feedback.

In terms of your paragraph on an experiment I don’t see the introduction of this system as such. In fact I only enabled it to give it a trial as per the shout box feature on the right of these forums. I took on board the feedback of the community and made changes to the system, these seem to have been taken well by a number of members and time will be given to see how the changes go and how beneficial they are found to be.

[hummm_mabbe]

Hi Josh

Thanks for the explanation and taking my points on board. Its good to hear that you encourage a calm, questioning approach to things, that I can see being helpful if people are able to carry it out. It sounds a lot like the empathy / assertion techniques that some therapists teach. The only downside is that perhaps not everyone will be aware of them? I have seen mods attemtping to get people to use them in the past however.

I do hope it starts to become a useful tool, despite a difficult 'birth'. As you say the upside of the system has been a little neglected, and it is fun to give others little plus points. Its very easy to focus only on the negative.

Ross

[catspiracy]

The only thing i can do is to "opt out". Rumination is one of the issues I am seeking recovery from. I don't intend to ever click those +/- buttons, and I will try very hard to pretend anyone's numbers dont even exist. It'll be like going to a nudist camp, avoiding looking down there promotes a lot of eye contact.

peace,

cat

[Villan]

Question Please- sorry if i am being thick

This reputation thingie

Is there a quick way to see what posts of yours have been graded by this system

my rep jus went up by 2 and i have scanned through todays posts and cant see why...

being as it could have been one i posted DONKEYs years ago and as there may have been no bumping as is just a click, there is no way i can see of finding out what i did good ?????

kinda defeats the object really being as we are sposed to be learning from this...

any way of making this easier to review...

thanks in advance for any help you can give me...

[hummm_mabbe]

Hi chips

I have my own little system for why I reward people, and one of my categories is if someone has gone to an effort for someone else. I voted up your donkey pics (lol like the subtle hintie) because you had made an effort for meeeeee which I liked. I also voted up some pictures that had been posted on the happy birthday dani thread :)

[Villan]

lol there was no subtle hintie hmmmm not conscious anyways but hey yo know the power of the subconscious !!! - but thanks for letting me know... that's one sorted i think...

i also reward for effort too - yayyyyyy

but if we are sposed to learn from this system, surely there should be better visibility of reputation marks available to the individual member... dunno if there is an optional report thingie that IF WE CHOOSE we get a report of what rep marks have been added that day... especially for those not so frequently on the site as me lol

otherwise i am at a loss to figure out how we can constructively learn from this system...