For Aran

[Roses]

Aran, I love you more than life itself,

You are an intelligent, clever and handsome boy.

I wish that I could put into words -

all the things I feel inside.

But when the demons take me over,

there is nothing left but pain.

I'm so sorry you sometimes see me cry,

and watch me sit in silent agony.

I am getting the help I need now son,

But sometimes therapy hurts.

Change takes time, and change is hard.

Trying is half the battle, I am trying.

So don't worry if I sometimes fall,

I am learning how to get back up.

Whatever happens I will always be here for you,

You are loved, you are seen, you are heard.

Love Mum x

[wordsmithy]

Aw.

This is brilliant, I don't what its is but that last line flows and works perfectly. As usual, good stuff Roses.

[Roses]

Thanks Smithy, a little background then. Aran is my son and is now 10 years old and a bit. Over the years my illness has been hard on him. After his baby sister was born (he was 3.5) I fell apart and then got back together. Me and his Dad were separated for some time (together now) and then in 2006 the hospital admissions started and there were 5/6 until at end of 2007 I was in for 5 months not being discharged properly until Feb 2008. He has seen me at my worst and he has seen me fall apart. This weekend I was overwhelmed and sitting on the sofa staring into space, unable to speak (completely dissociated) and he came and sat next to me. He spoke to me and kept me company even when I couldn't give him anything in return apart from some tears that trickeld from my eyes as I died inside. I literally cannot speak when I am like this but usually I shut myself away. In the past we have given him some dumbed down info on MH that I typed up from some MIND info as he was asking questions. So I decided to write him a poem that was not too much for him to handle, but a connection with me and how I feel so that when I cannot connect in real he will always have my heart for eternity, in his hand, in this poem. x

[Barebones]

Thats really nice rose, hope later in life he will look back on it and im sure he will be happy and understand. xx

[toaster]

((((((((roses and aran))))))))

[shadow8]

Thats so sweet Roses. He sounds like a great kid and its good he is there for you and understands a little. This is a great poem and shows how much you care about him.

[sarabpd]

Gave me goosebumps. That was really good Roses. Well done you :)

[Roses]

Thank you all. Thank you so much it really helps to get positive feedback xxx

[hummm_mabbe]

**sniffles**

[Roses]

oh dear, sorry Ross. ((((((((((((((((((((((((Ross and little Rossie)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[hummm_mabbe]

:grouphug[1]:

[donnam]

lovely poem roses

[Dani]

beautiful xx

[pepsimeg]

Roses its a lovely poem, at least u are able to put how u feel into words, im sure he appreciates it and can read this poem when times are tough.....

The fact that u wrote this poem will show him u care about him...... :wub:

[Roses]

thanks guys. Yes he has put it in his secret place (can't tell you where cos it's a secret!) along with the info we printed off for him bout 6 months or so ago. He often re-reads it when he is looking for answers and I'm lucky that he asks me for my opinion and doesn't sit alone with it all. He also goes to Young Carers now which gives him a lot of support and he went on a 6 week self-esteem course with them as well. The boy is never here!! LOL but that's the way it should be. He is a blessing to us all. xxx

[shadow8]

Yeah it is good he talks to you about his questions and feelings about it. Glad to hear he is getting the support too.

[Roses]

Thanks MYShadow xxx

[Villan]

wow... what a mature boy you got yuorself there hunni...

and good on you explaining stuff...

rewards all round

woo woo

kath xxx

[Roses]

Thanks Kath xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx