Jinxsta Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I would like to know why BPDikeme's post "leaving this site" was locked.. i know there is a rule of not giving "goodbye posts" but im sure we pretty much all know that what is meant by that rule is no "bye im going to kill myself" posts... I feel locking this topic is detrimental to the community, he wasnt gonna top himself, just leave the site and i think people like myself who had made friends with him would have liked to have had the oppertunety to reply to his post... yet it appears because he has made a small attack on the powers that be there has been a case of "closed ranks". xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piuma Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 hey babes, topics saying tha they are leaving the site are always locked, but they arent removed, so its not like they are being ignored, also babes, this member is still active and hasnt left, if everyone replied to their original topic and all said their good byes the member might feel even more awkward about coming back. if they changed their mind. sorry bit rambled, but im just borrowing a comp xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jinxsta Posted September 25, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 Hi Pie, hes still here? says like 8:30am or something on his profile... i see what ur saying about people feeling awkward coming back but isnt it even more awkward and frustrating is u say something that u think is wrong with the site then it just gets locked... like its saying "NO YOU CANNOT SPEAK OUT AGREEE WITH EVERYTHING OR FUCK OFF... in fact were even gonna lock ur topic so no-one can agree with u". xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I think the reason why 'goodbye' posts are locked is that people with BPD are often impulsive and with low self-esteem, are constantly seeking reassurance. So people sometimes make posts saying they are leaving, just to see if people will reply begging them to stay. Some people crave the reassurance of those sort of replies because it makes them feel wanted. So its not just suicide posts, but leaving-the-site type posts that are locked. Apologies to the admins/mods if I have spoken out of turn and got the reasons wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jinxsta Posted September 25, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I think the reason why 'goodbye' posts are locked is that people with BPD are often impulsive and with low self-esteem, are constantly seeking reassurance. So people sometimes make posts saying they are leaving, just to see if people will reply begging them to stay. Some people crave the reassurance of those sort of replies because it makes them feel wanted. So its not just suicide posts, but leaving-the-site type posts that are locked. Apologies to the admins/mods if I have spoken out of turn and got the reasons wrong. But is it not ok to seek some reassurance if u feel like everyone is against you? do we not all need a bit of that?... we have an "attention seekers section" is that not the same? xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roses Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 just playing devil's advocate Jinx, but you haven't posted about this before and plenty of goocbye posts have been locked. I know that you are friends with BPDlkeme, I am too, but it is a general rule and has been happening frequently. Mods have to apply the rules of the site and this has been discussed before. Please, if BPDlkeme needs support then he can still get it here. His post being locked does not mean he is being penalised unfairly. Have a look back at how many of thees types of post have been locked and you'll see it is just a blanket rule xxx Hope you are ok xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophhee23 Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I agree jinx, really missing BPDlkeme and im gutted hes let well more been driven away i suppose!! So many good ppl are being driven away from this site and joining elsewhere, something has to be done about this, favoritisim is not on, everyone SHOULD be treated the same...thinking about leaving myself...its such a shame whats happening here, but there are other sites that maybe these ppl are better off at!!! Need to think Miss u dude xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boobsticle Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 Goodbye posts are always locked, no matter what the content. It says it pretty clearly in the Terms, 10. Goodbye posts will be closed as soon as posted. No member of the community should reply to these and as soon as a member of the staff team becomes aware of such a post, it shall be closed. BPDlkeme was just treated in the way everyone else is. No matter how it may come across, everyone here is treated equally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boobsticle Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I'd like to know the reason for my post being negged, I was speaking the truth and I'd like to hear why you think differently. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 Arrakis, I +'d it for you . I've given up bothering to ask why my posts are being negged. Its the same people who do it all the time. I think they love to hate me lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Summer* Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 No one has the right to demand an explanation, all you need to know is I disagree with your post, that is why it was negged. I also disagree with your demanding. You are a mod, consider your tone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boobsticle Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I think someone has a problem with my assertion that 'everyone here is treated equally', if that person would like to voice their concerns to me via PM I'd be more than happy to review the situation in the case of unfair/favourable treatment toward someone that I may have missed and rectify it. edit I didn't mean to demand an explanation, I was just curious as to why it was negged because I was speaking the truth, as I see it. If it came across as demanding, I apologise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Summer* Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 Arrakis, I +'d it for you . I've given up bothering to ask why my posts are being negged. Its the same people who do it all the time. I think they love to hate me lol. [/quote It is not for you to delete my expression of opinion thank you Data. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Summer* Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I think someone has a problem with my assertion that 'everyone here is treated equally', if that person would like to voice their concerns to me via PM I'd be more than happy to review the situation in the case of unfair/favourable treatment toward someone that I may have missed and rectify it. edit I didn't mean to demand an explanation, I was just curious as to why it was negged because I was speaking the truth, as I see it. If it came across as demanding, I apologise. The truth is always subjective. I have a right to my "truth". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 It is not for you to delete my expression of opinion thank you Data. I have not deleted it. If you click on the rep score for that post you can see that I have given it a positive and you a negative. So we have both expressed our opinion . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Summer* Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 You do understand what I mean, so you are not doing anything but stirring up trouble so I will ignore you on this thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Summer* Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 Arrakis, I +'d it for you . I think this is called misusing the rep system? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 You do understand what I mean, so you are not doing anything but stirring up trouble so I will ignore you on this thread. You are the one who thinks you have a right to an opinion but other people have not got a right to counter it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Summer* Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 No, you gave a point that you would not have given had I not taken one. Now, end of discussion with you and the vino. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boobsticle Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 I think someone has a problem with my assertion that 'everyone here is treated equally', if that person would like to voice their concerns to me via PM I'd be more than happy to review the situation in the case of unfair/favourable treatment toward someone that I may have missed and rectify it. edit I didn't mean to demand an explanation, I was just curious as to why it was negged because I was speaking the truth, as I see it. The truth is always subjective. I have a right to my "truth". Of course you do, but if you want to search through, you'll see all goodbye threads are locked. If people think BPDlkeme was treated unfairly by his goodbye thread being locked, the evidence is there to suggest the contrary. Goodbye threads are always closed. Like I said, if anyone has a concern with the way things are run, you can PM a staff member, it'll be private. We're a peer support site so we do listen, and we'll be happy to reconsider any decision, should a logical argument be given. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bibiddi Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 If he has chosen to leave, then responding to his post would never be seen by him. However, as BDPlkeme's post was closed, as per the rules. Could some of his friends try and encourage him to write a post that will be helpful for himself, and that others could respond to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jinxsta Posted September 25, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 TBH fuck this shit right now... my point was just people may feel rejected and unwanted (esp with BPD) if a goodbye post is made and locked... no i wont PM coz well to be perfectly honest i couldnt give a flying fuck anymore PLUS this is a community concern not a privatre one... go ahead do the little rules and acts against free speech, and kicking people while they are down... who am i to judge? xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boobsticle Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 So are you saying you have a problem with that particular rule? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jinxsta Posted September 25, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 Yes xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boobsticle Posted September 25, 2010 Report Share Posted September 25, 2010 Okey dokey, I'll talk to Josh about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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