Im New To This And Thought Id Try This For A Bit Of Support?

[lisa83]

hi im new to this site.. im lisa.

i was depressed when i was 6 months pregnant and my bf at the time decided to leave me for another woman. this left me with no self esteem what so ever and i have been single ever since. i now suffer with anxiety, panic attacks and depression. i can usually contain my depression but the lat few days ive felt at an all time low again! the last time i felt this bad was when i was pregnant.

for some reason i feel that i must be some sort of terrible person and that im not nice in the slightest cos all people ever do is treat me like s**t. i was bullied at work by someone who knew my bckground and she took full pleasure in making my life even worse than it was already. then all that got sorted but i stil didnt trust her... i saw her for the first time yesterday and i think that made me feel bad again.... then a friend of mine stopped talking to me because i didnt tell her that another friend of ours got a new job, i also saw this person yesterday!!

i feel like so down, the only thing that keeps me going is my wondeful daughter whom i love very much..... i just hate feeling this way and the worse thing is why do i feel this way? i shouldnt and now writing it down i feel like im being totally pathetic! there is more to it but i couldnt write it all down - it'd take me forever!!

just feel so so so low thought id try anything for help and support!

lisa x

[canadianbumble]

:welcomeani:

sorry jumbled at mo but hi

[lisa83]

sorry jumbled at mo but hi

thanks, Hi x

[Wynter Grace]

:welcomeani:

Hi,

Sorry you are going through a rough time at the moment.

It is friendly and supportive here, hope you can find what you are looking for

Wynter

xxxx

[catsmother21]

Hi there Lisa and welcome :)

[majorgoo]

Well, a lot of annoying and some very harsh things have hit you recently. There's no shame in feeling down when there's a lot of crap going around and it takes time to get over things and be able to move on. Have you got any professional support?

As far as dealing with bullies goes - if she says anything nasty just stare straight at her, put on your angriest face and (with utmost clarity) say "Shut your stupid face." Repeat, getting louder until she stops speaking completely... oh, if she stands up to look bigger, stand up as well.

It normally works if you talk over someone til they shut up. I've no time for bullies, and this approach has worked well for me and done wonders for my self-esteem.

You may want to change sentences from time to time, classic lines like:

"You dumb, naive tit."

"Can you just die please, and do us all a favour?"

"How is it you can survive without a functioning brain?"

"What is the point in your existence?"

Oh, and try laughing as well - whenever she walks away, laugh, if she asks why, tell her "it's nothing." then laugh more.

It's all I can suggest. I really hate bullies.

Cheers.

[lisa83]

hi thanks for all your comments..

james thanks for that, i did stand up to this woman on a number of occaisions she was just so mean and 20 years older than me too!! allot of people suggested that she was jealous of me... i dont know why she'd ever be jealous of me, except the fact i have a beautiful daughter!! but i shall try talking over her next time again.... thank you sooo much xx

[6of9]

No way are you pathetic. It takes strength and courage to even look for help...let alone put your feelings in writing and seek some comfort and support. You should be proud of yourself for doing that. From what I can see, you are a strong person who has sacrificed alot. You have a child who you love so much and who loves you. I have a daughter who is 14 and I haven't seen her since she was 18-months old. I think of her everyday.

Look at what you've been through...look at how you've survived. You have a strength that many people in this world never have to summon. You have done it and you really should be proud of yourself.

I don't know what else to say except that I am in awe of you and how you have kept going for the sake of your child...a selfless and courageous achievement.

God bless x

p.s. I disagree with James though...just walk away, don't get into an exchange of any kind. People like this don't like it when you ignore them, treat them as if they don't exist. They only do what they do to get a reaction, to instill some kind of power over you. When you walk away as if you haven't even heard a word they say, you will inflict more damage to their ego than any words you could ever utter.

[lisa83]

No way are you pathetic. It takes strength and courage to even look for help...let alone put your feelings in writing and seek some comfort and support. You should be proud of yourself for doing that. From what I can see, you are a strong person who has sacrificed alot. You have a child who you love so much and who loves you. I have a daughter who is 14 and I haven't seen her since she was 18-months old. I think of her everyday.

Look at what you've been through...look at how you've survived. You have a strength that many people in this world never have to summon. You have done it and you really should be proud of yourself.

I don't know what else to say except that I am in awe of you and how you have kept going for the sake of your child...a selfless and courageous achievement.

God bless x

p.s. I disagree with James though...just walk away, don't get into an exchange of any kind. People like this don't like it when you ignore them, treat them as if they don't exist. They only do what they do to get a reaction, to instill some kind of power over you. When you walk away as if you haven't even heard a word they say, you will inflict more damage to their ego than any words you could ever utter.

hi thanks for ur comment.. that actually made me smile properly for the first time in weeks! i do love my daughter very very much she is the only reason i have kept going. im sorry to hear that you do not see your daughter. must be the hardest thing ever in this world to have to do.

i have found seeking help hard, although my gp is fantastic, keeps a regular eye on me, i think ive just got myself into a right old mess at the min... is extremely hard work going to work at the min and facing people but your right, i do it. i just find it hard sometimes and hate the thought of facing the world as te world is such a judgemental place. i want to be able to feel happy within myself again and to feel that im worthy of having all the things that ive ever dreamed, but at the minute i feel that that is all it is... a dream :(

[b0bulat0r]

Dear lisa82

welcome to this site. I hope you come to find this a friendly and close community and make a great many friends here.

by no means should you consider yourself a bad person, unfortunately a large number of people in the world are horrible people, discard them until you find the good ones (this is a good place to find some of those good ones),

I know its hard to have confidence in yourself when others break it,

I cant really offer anything that hasn't been said already on this post, but if you want someone to talk to i'm always here.

wishing you well

Rob

[lisa83]

Dear lisa82

welcome to this site. I hope you come to find this a friendly and close community and make a great many friends here.

by no means should you consider yourself a bad person, unfortunately a large number of people in the world are horrible people, discard them until you find the good ones (this is a good place to find some of those good ones),

I know its hard to have confidence in yourself when others break it,

I cant really offer anything that hasn't been said already on this post, but if you want someone to talk to i'm always here.

wishing you well

Rob

hi rob,

many thanks that is much appreciated

lisa x

[grey sky]

Hi Lisa,

Your not being pathetic, it sounds like you have been through a lot and any of those events individually could leave someone feeling low. It seems awful that when you really needed people to help you regain your confidence the work bully should make you feel even worse, its a shame there are such horrid people about that need to be nasty to others in order to feel better about themselves. As its at work, you have to be careful what you say to protect yourself so its better to ignore or jot it down in a notepad.

Your friend's being unfair so don't feel her strop is your fault, it's not up to you to tell them the news & sounds like you simply forgot so why are they making a mountain out of a molehill. Perhaps do some reading on how to boost your self-esteem and become more assertive as think that would help you keep only nice people in your life and not put up with those that are making you feel bad.

[becky lew]

hi Lisa,

it really is horrible what you are going through.

Please know that we are all here for you no matter what happens.

If you need to vent you know where.

Good luck and just think to your self

it gets better :)

[becky lew]

hi Lisa,

it really is horrible what you are going through.

Please know that we are all here for you no matter what happens.

If you need to vent you know where.

Good luck and just think to your self

it gets better :)

[Confuzzled13]

Hi lisa,

I hope you smile soon.

I agree with 6of9.... Best case with bullies is NO reaction, after all that's what they are after... If you can't avoid a reaction I would suggest something like;

'I'd appreciate it if you could please keep your negative comments to yourself. Thank you'

'I'm sorry, I don't understand what caused that comment, but I find it really hurtful, did you realise that?'

Failing the above, seek some support from yolur management. No one should have to put up with bullying. Anybody who can walk away from you, or fall out with you without an explanation or giving you a chance to right things is probably not worth losing sleep over. Sometimes they are the people who have been exerting negative influences on your life. I had a clear out recently, not all of it my choice, but my life is much calmer as a result. Sometimes it is ll too easy to bve drawn into relationships that can make you ill without you realising...

xx

[Confuzzled13]

scuse bad typos! LOL

[black heart]

Hi Lisa,

I'm so sorry you have been thru so much and continue to do so. I think joining this site is a great idea. I have a little girl too, and when im feeling depressed i find facing up to it very difficult...it make me feel pathetic, a failure as a parent. but at the end of it, facing it, and staying strong is what our little princesses need from their mummys.

Please feel free to pm if u need to chat. With regards to this bully....she sounds like a total bi@tch....u need to say ur piece to her and be done with it..its easy to say but yeah she probably is jealous of you, and lives quite a pathetic life herself if this is how she gets her kicks. get her told, or send her round to me i sort her out! lol

above all, stay strong ...get on some meds if u arent improving, seeing ur gp...daunting i know, but defo worth it.

I had a bit if a breakdown a couple weeks ago, packed a bag and trained from central scotland to london. I havent seen a dr here, need to see one im worried my depression might actually be a bit more than what they've previously told me....im going home wednesday. If you havent already, what say we agree to go see gp...obv not the same one, but at least book at the same time?

you take care girl, chin up. pm if ud like to chat.

everyone has a past honey, mines is quite the colourful nightmare, its what u make of the future that counts.

mwah

Black x

[6of9]

Sometimes it is all too easy to be drawn into relationships that can make you ill without you realising...

So so so very true...wise words indeed.

[dazhiki]

welcome and this is a very good place to get support both reading and taking in and just people telling you to keep going and help boost you up there are amazing people here and i donðt think i can add to anything people haven't already said hope you get through.