hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Hi there I remember reading a while back that in social anxiety and paranoia, people tend to 'see' disapproval on the faces of people when it is not there. This tends to just come up as a felt, bodily reaction rather than a thought, and this feeling is what then tends to colour the experience for the person. They both see, feel and remember disapproval, when none may have been there, and their reaction to those feelings can then actually 'contaminate' the interaction, especially if its anger or defensiveness that is triggered. Now, this IS a bit creepy, so if you are feeling vulnerable I would recommend staying away from it. Its a computer generated face, which is pretty damn realistic. What struck me as I was looking at it (especially when I got it to 'look at' me) was that, indeed, feelings that she is somehow angry, shocked at me, or offended actually DO go through my mind and body. Knowing that this is a CG character, and especially that the creators intended it to look 'friendly' makes no difference - that immediate visceral reaction is still the same. I found it fascinating because it let me 'see through' my emotional reactions, that the feeling of being rejected is simply immediate and programmed in me. And because of that, maybe its something i can try to let go of. The site is here http://www.cubo.cc/creepygirl/ . In full screen, for me it really does produce a visceral reaction, so as i said if you are feeling vulnerable maybe dont look at it right now. If you are feeling brave, try loading it up and then watch your reactions to it. I know some psychologists have talked about using CG / VR as 'exposure' in anxiety disorders. This one certainly presses some buttons for me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Ross, this sounds really interesting, and from what you have said sounds as though it could be beneficial, but i'm not in too safe a place at the moment, so I will come back to this and see what's what. Thankyou for sharing. Crip xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Ross, this sounds really interesting, and from what you have said sounds as though it could be beneficial, but i'm not in too safe a place at the moment, so I will come back to this and see what's what. Thankyou for sharing. Crip xxx Yeah it is a bit on the creepy side! Defo not teddy-level cuddly. Bit different from de flurf I usually post lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walker Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 jeez i dont like her she's scary and spends the whole time trying to ignore me i would definitely get away from her fast if she was real Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 jeez i dont like her she's scary and spends the whole time trying to ignore me i would definitely get away from her fast if she was real If you move the mouse to the centre of the screen, and keep nudging it, you can get her to look at you Your mouse pointer controls where she looks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Gahhh, curiosity has gotten the better of me, gunna have a peek...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Gahhh, curiosity has gotten the better of me, gunna have a peek...... **hugs crippie like someone getting on a rollercoaster for first time** :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Fanks Rossie, you're such a sweet'eart. xxx Right, gunna talk me way through this jot stuff down on a note pad then write out here what goes on fer me.......... At first I thought "oh! she's not creepy! she's actually kinda cute..." then got this weird kind of feeling, I guess it was like an "ooh, I'd like to be friends with her." which then made me feel embarrassed, as, obv, she ain't blummin' real!! Then felt like she'd sensed my embarrassment, and was laughing with me at my silliness..... then felt like I was embarrassing her by being near her..... Felt awkward, uncomfortable... then felt like she was laughing AT me. Then felt this wrongness, like I'd done something bad or stupid, or maybe it was more of a "oh, shit i've broken something" kind of wrongness, with that shame all mixed in. she did this sideways glance thing and then looked back at me, felt as though she was mocking me.... uncomfortable!!! "sitting outside headmaster's office in that chair where EVERYONE who walks past can see and knows you're in trouble" kind of uncomfortable. And now I feel like I've said something that she doubts, and then that glance was just full-on disbelief. Arghhh feel really uncomfortable, like i wanna hide, and now she looks really mad! Like I've just massively insulted her or something, and I'm closing the window. Gahhhh. What a mish-mash of stuff! That is so weird!!!! xxx Edit: thinking about it, that's pretty much how i respond to people in RL, too. So many thoughts and feelings all at once, no wonder I get so scared about meeting new people :unsure: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walker Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 still dont get it made her look at me and she is just annoying with an inane, creepy, android grin so made her look down and pretend she was watching a fly crawl across my laptop lol if she was real, would feel loads but knowing she isnt well better go Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 still dont get it made her look at me and she is just annoying with an inane, creepy, android grin so made her look down and pretend she was watching a fly crawl across my laptop lol if she was real, would feel loads but knowing she isnt well better go ((((((((((((Walker)))))))))))) you okay hun? xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 still dont get it made her look at me and she is just annoying with an inane, creepy, android grin so made her look down and pretend she was watching a fly crawl across my laptop lol if she was real, would feel loads but knowing she isnt well better go Hullo Not to worry, this isnt like a proper 'thing' or anything - its just a japanese site that turns photos into faces. The whole psychological bit is just me waffling, I've added that, so its not like you are meant to feel anything with the piccie. If she just creeps you out, then she creeps you out. She is defo less intimidating when looking at the fly though :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Fanks Rossie, you're such a sweet'eart. xxx Right, gunna talk me way through this jot stuff down on a note pad then write out here what goes on fer me.......... At first I thought "oh! she's not creepy! she's actually kinda cute..." then got this weird kind of feeling, I guess it was like an "ooh, I'd like to be friends with her." which then made me feel embarrassed, as, obv, she ain't blummin' real!! Then felt like she'd sensed my embarrassment, and was laughing with me at my silliness..... then felt like I was embarrassing her by being near her..... Felt awkward, uncomfortable... then felt like she was laughing AT me. Then felt this wrongness, like I'd done something bad or stupid, or maybe it was more of a "oh, shit i've broken something" kind of wrongness, with that shame all mixed in. she did this sideways glance thing and then looked back at me, felt as though she was mocking me.... uncomfortable!!! "sitting outside headmaster's office in that chair where EVERYONE who walks past can see and knows you're in trouble" kind of uncomfortable. And now I feel like I've said something that she doubts, and then that glance was just full-on disbelief. Arghhh feel really uncomfortable, like i wanna hide, and now she looks really mad! Like I've just massively insulted her or something, and I'm closing the window. Gahhhh. What a mish-mash of stuff! That is so weird!!!! xxx Edit: thinking about it, that's pretty much how i respond to people in RL, too. So many thoughts and feelings all at once, no wonder I get so scared about meeting new people Hiya Yes that was kind of my reaction too - noticing how all that stuff from the past, all my patterns and so on were getting triggered. I guess because I know she isnt real, it gives the opportunity to sit back and notice all of that because you know you havent got to say something in the next second. For me it was quite an eye opener, and I wonder if it will occur to me when talking to real people. The thing that affected me the most was when she stopped smiling. I seemed to hyper-zoom in on her right eye, as it went from smiling to not smiling. I just felt immediately like I had offended her, and I realise this happens all the time IRL. So will have to see if I remember this the next time I 'see' that out in the world. Hope you are ok and not triggered or owt though, maybe go look at de bun buns again cuz they never look disapproving. Always full of wubz Ross Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Fanks Rossie, you're such a sweet'eart. xxx Right, gunna talk me way through this jot stuff down on a note pad then write out here what goes on fer me.......... At first I thought "oh! she's not creepy! she's actually kinda cute..." then got this weird kind of feeling, I guess it was like an "ooh, I'd like to be friends with her." which then made me feel embarrassed, as, obv, she ain't blummin' real!! Then felt like she'd sensed my embarrassment, and was laughing with me at my silliness..... then felt like I was embarrassing her by being near her..... Felt awkward, uncomfortable... then felt like she was laughing AT me. Then felt this wrongness, like I'd done something bad or stupid, or maybe it was more of a "oh, shit i've broken something" kind of wrongness, with that shame all mixed in. she did this sideways glance thing and then looked back at me, felt as though she was mocking me.... uncomfortable!!! "sitting outside headmaster's office in that chair where EVERYONE who walks past can see and knows you're in trouble" kind of uncomfortable. And now I feel like I've said something that she doubts, and then that glance was just full-on disbelief. Arghhh feel really uncomfortable, like i wanna hide, and now she looks really mad! Like I've just massively insulted her or something, and I'm closing the window. Gahhhh. What a mish-mash of stuff! That is so weird!!!! xxx Edit: thinking about it, that's pretty much how i respond to people in RL, too. So many thoughts and feelings all at once, no wonder I get so scared about meeting new people Hiya Yes that was kind of my reaction too - noticing how all that stuff from the past, all my patterns and so on were getting triggered. I guess because I know she isnt real, it gives the opportunity to sit back and notice all of that because you know you havent got to say something in the next second. For me it was quite an eye opener, and I wonder if it will occur to me when talking to real people. The thing that affected me the most was when she stopped smiling. I seemed to hyper-zoom in on her right eye, as it went from smiling to not smiling. I just felt immediately like I had offended her, and I realise this happens all the time IRL. So will have to see if I remember this the next time I 'see' that out in the world. Hope you are ok and not triggered or owt though, maybe go look at de bun buns again cuz they never look disapproving. Always full of wubz Ross quick reply as i'm feeling all ants-in-me-pants-ish and anxious today, so can't sit still for too long. But yes, I noticed that although what i was "seeing" panicked me a bit, it was no-where near as intense as IRL. Defo gunna try hold onto the thought that it happened pretty-much the same with a fake person as it would with a real one, see if that calms me down some and actually gives me the less panic-ridden space and time i need to actually properly "see" what's going on in real life interactions. Cheers for this Ross. Really given me something to think about, and I always appreciate that... idle mind = devil's workshop 'n' all tha'.... Felt a little triggered by it, but cookies and fluff pics do indeed calm me down a treat. xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 Hope you feel a bit better, just think of pocket bun whilst you nibble them cookies :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 I've also just found a CG face modeler program, which lets you create any face you like with any expression. I tried fiddling with the anger / disgust setting, and was amazed at how angry and defensive I started feeling. As the expression formed on this bunch of pixels on a screen, I found myself attributing all this history and personality to it, and wanted to punch it! Its amazing how the brain just creates all this stuff. I even found myself reflecting the expression back at the screen - getting angry back at it. Bizarre. Its like looking behind the Wizard of Oz's curtain and seeing the machine at work :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walker Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 you should get out more !!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wordsmithy Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 reason for edit - incoherent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maize Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 I'm sorry I didn't get how it was anxiety producing. I thought I was going to feel something intensely negative based on other posts but ultimately it was just funny to me and quickly became bored with it. It's great for a quick chuckle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 I've also just found a CG face modeler program, which lets you create any face you like with any expression. I tried fiddling with the anger / disgust setting, and was amazed at how angry and defensive I started feeling. As the expression formed on this bunch of pixels on a screen, I found myself attributing all this history and personality to it, and wanted to punch it! Its amazing how the brain just creates all this stuff. I even found myself reflecting the expression back at the screen - getting angry back at it. Bizarre. Its like looking behind the Wizard of Oz's curtain and seeing the machine at work Please forgive my all-round idiocy, but was this on a website, or...? If so, do you have a link? Got me all hooked now, wanna go exploring... not sure if is good or bad or just ...is... but am all for insight into this wacko mind o' mine. xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 I'm sorry I didn't get how it was anxiety producing. I thought I was going to feel something intensely negative based on other posts but ultimately it was just funny to me and quickly became bored with it. It's great for a quick chuckle. Like I said above, its not like an 'official' "this is what you should feel" thing. Its not been designed to actually produce a reaction at all - its just meant to be a face. Its a sample from a site where you can turn your own face into a 3D image. I just found it, personally had a reaction and thought others might be interested. If you have no reaction, thats probably a good thing Ross Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hummm_mabbe Posted March 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 I've also just found a CG face modeler program, which lets you create any face you like with any expression. I tried fiddling with the anger / disgust setting, and was amazed at how angry and defensive I started feeling. As the expression formed on this bunch of pixels on a screen, I found myself attributing all this history and personality to it, and wanted to punch it! Its amazing how the brain just creates all this stuff. I even found myself reflecting the expression back at the screen - getting angry back at it. Bizarre. Its like looking behind the Wizard of Oz's curtain and seeing the machine at work Please forgive my all-round idiocy, but was this on a website, or...? If so, do you have a link? Got me all hooked now, wanna go exploring... not sure if is good or bad or just ...is... but am all for insight into this wacko mind o' mine. xx You can download a free version here http://www.facegen.com/modeller.htm I am having a giggle with it :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evade Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 I think that will probably the last time I click the link before reading the post first Very odd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted March 5, 2011 Report Share Posted March 5, 2011 I've also just found a CG face modeler program, which lets you create any face you like with any expression. I tried fiddling with the anger / disgust setting, and was amazed at how angry and defensive I started feeling. As the expression formed on this bunch of pixels on a screen, I found myself attributing all this history and personality to it, and wanted to punch it! Its amazing how the brain just creates all this stuff. I even found myself reflecting the expression back at the screen - getting angry back at it. Bizarre. Its like looking behind the Wizard of Oz's curtain and seeing the machine at work Please forgive my all-round idiocy, but was this on a website, or...? If so, do you have a link? Got me all hooked now, wanna go exploring... not sure if is good or bad or just ...is... but am all for insight into this wacko mind o' mine. xx You can download a free version here http://www.facegen.com/modeller.htm I am having a giggle with it Ta v. much luvvey. Shall defo check this out, but am thinking will save it 'til tomorrow when it's light outside Tend to get really nervy and stuff as it is on the nighttimes, don't wanna risk adding to it. Thankyouuu xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carlylight1 Posted March 6, 2011 Report Share Posted March 6, 2011 *shudders* the bit where the expression is changing from smile to something else worried me and i immediately started to feel 'what have i done wrong' before the thinking part of me kicked in and realised i couldn't have done something wrong. actually found it hard to stop looking at her as i was really trying to work out what she as thinking. which i guess is what i do everyday-over analyse peoples perceptions of me. another thing i realised-in every day life i smile all the fricking time and i hate it because it makes me feel fake but can't stop it. i think i read somewhere that it is a gesture of surrender or it is for me because most of the time i'm not smiling because i'm happy. because i'm scared i'm instantly surrendering and being all 'please like me, please be nice to me, please smile back at me' which could be why people react a bit strangely to me, or why i perceive they do. they feel a bit awkward as they can pick up on my nervousness and need for approval. i think it would probably make me feel awkward it it was the other way round, i'm not too sure but its something else to think about. xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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