sanctuary Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 When considering a course of action.... I am aware that a basic pro's and con's is useful... however, the DBT pro's and con's has both a p&c's for 'yes' and a p%c's for 'no' thereby giving four columns and not the usual black and white 2!!! I have always thought a simple list of pro's and con's would be fodder to a BPD person in a spin as I often think it just adds weight to the already black and white thinking... so I have found it quite a revelation to see that there is a pro's and con's which then looks at the diagonal rather than 2 dimensional list.... In line with doing what feels right in my heart and doing what is best for all concerned.... I have stumbled upon felicific calculas and as a mark of testimony the serendiptious nature of this knowledge find, are these wonderful words that end the wiki page on which they are written.... Intense, long, certain, speedy, fruitful, pure— Such marks in pleasures and in pains endure. Such pleasures seek if private be thy end: If it be public, wide let them extend Such pains avoid, whichever be thy view: If pains must come, let them extend to few. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justine giggle Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 thats lovely hun!!! i find the pro's and con's of dbt really work if i remember to use them and can motivate myself enough. big hugs to you xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 I'm half way through the first six months.... soooo much to take in and it's all really hard work at the moment but these are life skills aren't they? I am hoping with practice I will be able to reveal what I have been hiding for so long.... the need to change from the bottom up...... pro's and cons is really really intteresting.... i did for whether or not to quit therapy and it really really worked. Hope all is going well with you. xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justine giggle Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 hard work i know but stick with it hun its so worth it. im coming to the end of my first year and now starting to use the skills automatically, still have my moments but its a life time of behaviours and ways of coping to change and know deep down i will get there. tiny steps hun, we will get there. xxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 are you getting on better with people in life now.... I mean, sorry I am depserate to hear the success of realtionships 'post DBT' as until even now, I find isolating myself the only way to avoid all the misunderstandings involved.... no one seems to be speaking my language at the moment,.... all the DBT skills language is alien to most people...... xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justine giggle Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 the interpersonal effective skills have helped loads, im finding that im comunicating with people alot better now and certainly with more confidence, it really does work if you follow the steps. i used to avoid everything, going out, being around people, conversations etc but now im not so afraid anymore, i give it all a go. (sometimes its easier than other times). do you get one to one therapy as well??? xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 yep. 1 hour on a wednesday chain analysis and diary card exploration and 2.5 hours group skills training on a fri... xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benway Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Hi sanctuary, Glad your dbt is going well. I hope to find a group here . It sounds really good and the privacy of 1 on 1 as well as group dbt. I dabbled with dbt with my last councellor, and I would love to do it 'properly'. Good luck & best wishes xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wade Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Haven't attempted DBT myself but....... well done Sanctuary, working so hard on yourself, seeing you are worth it (OMG Loreal!) Safe hugs xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 thanks darling, when the doctors hauled me through a long speech about how extremely difficult and hard it was going to be and to be absolutely sure about signing the contract, I can see now, that they could not have tried to make it any more clear...... Expecting it to be hard, and intense, was just a teaser..... having taken away all option of using destructive methods to cope, we are left exposed and with no where to run and hide..... just managing the intense emotions without acting on them requires a self discipline that could match any serious spiritual path...... Forget life.... if you are doing DBT, that is all your life is going to be so make sure you are ready to sacrifice all your coping mechanisms and be expected to meditate at a time of extreme emotional distress. Anyone who completes DBT is a fucking saint...... anyone that walks out and quits may be smarter and know more about themselves than they care to admit. I have as much respect for the person that quits as the person that commits..... it is not easy which ever way you look at it. xxxxxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wade Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Life is complicated, what you have just written demonstrates that you are not only able to see in "black and white". There are many different colours. You have learnt something invaluable. xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 thank you wade xxxx does that mean i get a gold star, or maybe true love, or am i now asking too much lol..... seeing life through the DBT is like looking at life through the whole electromagnetic spectrum - requires sight (insight) beyond our every day eyes.... and a belief in the impossible... is that an ultra violet perspective i am gaining..... wow.... the world was soooooooo boring in black and white xxxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wade Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justine giggle Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 i think you deserve a gold star for giving it a go hun. it is hard work but keep on going with it you will get there xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilly83 Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Well done sweet sounds like ur doin great. Just want to say thanks for not criticising thouse who quite. I did a year and felt it wasn't helpful at all and frustrated me far more than anything else. I take my hat off to those who complete it I know its not always easy. Not sure if ur doin full program hun if so well done it must be tryin. Sadly where I am they only offer group with nothin else at all. So you couldn't really go back to someone with questions etc once you d thought over it? If that makes sense. For myself I gained nor lost anythin but glad I tried it. Hope you get everything and more from it hun good luck x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.