sanctuary Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 It's an element, but not on the diagnostic criteria. Plenty of non borderlines have an aversion to change. It's the coping mechanisms you use when change comes about that make it borderline. Like I said, count yourself lucky Narcissa that you are NOT averse to change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cw590 Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 I really really hate the change!! why are so many people glad that it is gone!? i found it really helpful! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bundy117 Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 As i cant give Claire a HUG anywhere else now. Claire i send you a big HUG, xx i hate this also Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 It's an element, but not on the diagnostic criteria. Plenty of non borderlines have an aversion to change. It's the coping mechanisms you use when change comes about that make it borderline. Personality Disorder is notoriously about an inability to adapt to change - within the personality itself!! Dear oh dear this is lesson number one folks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Divsky Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Just realized its gone and not happy about it I liked the updates and it was nice seeing what was on others minds and made it nice with the brief but frequent convo's you could have on them really miss it David Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joshua Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Personality Disorder is notoriously about an inability to adapt to change - within the personality itself!! Dear oh dear this is lesson number one folks. The way in which you speak with people is far from acceptable. Its one thing to speak to me like you do but another entirely when someone doesent share the view you do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narcissa Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Did I say it wasn't? Like I said, there are other factors to it. And not all personality disorders have that problem. You seem to be generalising all personality disorders with this one element. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Personality Disorder is notoriously about an inability to adapt to change - within the personality itself!! Dear oh dear this is lesson number one folks. The way in which you speak with people is far from acceptable. Its one thing to speak to me like you do but another entirely when someone doesent share the view you do. i am projecting exactly what i am trying to say to you on narcissa.... this is not a crime (but a very common psychological way of trying to find some truth in the world around us) and infact thank you you have made me aware of it. Narcissa... sorry, you are caught in the crossfire. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joshua Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 i am projecting exactly what i am trying to say to you on narcissa.... this is not a crime (but a very common psychological way of trying to find some truth in the world around us) and infact thank you you have made me aware of it. Narcissa... sorry, you are caught in the crossfire. Sounds like you have become quite effiecent at making excuses for your behaviour. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanctuary Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 i am projecting exactly what i am trying to say to you on narcissa.... this is not a crime (but a very common psychological way of trying to find some truth in the world around us) and infact thank you you have made me aware of it. Narcissa... sorry, you are caught in the crossfire. Sounds like you have become quite effiecent at making excuses for your behaviour. sounds like.... yes sounds like.....but the truth my friend is something quite different. Would you prefer I say "you stupid fucking bunch of cunts are you thick or what???"... erm, restraint is needed and now is not the time for coming up with the same line many a parent has used on their own BOD child. What happened to you Josh? I swear you have forgotten yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dibley Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Josh, I don't really want to get involved in this, but, shouldn't you be trying to keep the peace? Listen to people? Take on board their opinions? Try to help? Be the glue that holds it together? Not, back bite back and rile people. I don't think it is giving a very good view of you. It's like the boss in a job, they don't attack their staff and belittle them. They try to listen so their business runs smoothly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cw590 Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Josh, I don't really want to get involved in this, but, shouldn't you be trying to keep the peace? Listen to people? Take on board their opinions? Try to help? Be the glue that holds it together? Not, back bite back and rile people. I don't think it is giving a very good view of you. It's like the boss in a job, they don't attack their staff and belittle them. They try to listen so their business runs smoothly. well said!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyheartemma Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 this is quite mixed up but i'm not trying to have a go at anyone, i'd really like to make everyone feel better but i dont know if its going to work. maybe thats how josh felt when he took the statuses away. ((((((hugs)))))))) to everyone who is hurting for any reason I liked the status bar a lot and i miss it. I like having the crisis plans and things private, the new support centre looks really good and interesting and i like the design of it too, it looks smart and professional and i do appreciate that Josh has made something so pretty and useful for us, even if it doesnt do everything we want/need. Thank you for thinking of us and working to improve things I dont like the shoutbox atm but maybe thats because like lots of ppl (tho i don't have bpd) i don't like sudden changes. they freak me out, make me feel lost and unsafe and less connected to everyone the suddenness of it all wasnt good for me but it was meant as a nice suprise, it didnt work out but Joshs intentions were good, its nice that ppl want to give us nice suprises coz life is full of horrible ones. its just for some ppl suprises are never nice! my mum likes saying *close your eyes and hold out your hands* to me and i just freak out. I know she would never give me anything bad but i like to know whats coming! Josh says he isnt the person who makes the software so theres limits to what he can do. so we probably cant get the status updates back. the shoutbox doesnt replace it atm but maybe theres something we can do that does replace it. is there any way we could have a status updates forum or subforum? then we could go in there and post what we want to post in the status updates, other members can read the threads and post replies. members could be encoraged to post part of the update in the title so it gets your attention the same way as how status updates did. I dont know anything about creating forums but if its not difficult and not expensive, it might work as an alternative to the status updates so ppl would feel a bit more secure sorry if i offended anyone or if i'm getting bossy. i'm just saying whats in my mind on the off chance it might help Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eternal Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Josh, I don't really want to get involved in this, but, shouldn't you be trying to keep the peace? Listen to people? Take on board their opinions? Try to help? Be the glue that holds it together? Not, back bite back and rile people. I don't think it is giving a very good view of you. It's like the boss in a job, they don't attack their staff and belittle them. They try to listen so their business runs smoothly. what a great post.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bibiddi Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Emma, I'll steal what eternal said, but direct it at you - great post.x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cloud12 Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 I miss the status updates, they felt personal and u cud chat to people properly on them, this shoutbox does not allow for good conversation and to be honest I feel alone on the site now, without status updates I feel limited in what I can say or do. Who will be able to hear my witty remarks or incredible knowledge? lol...Seriously though why not just give the mini mods more power so that they can get rid of offensive updates? It wud work well I think......Or give me the power! I cud be like Cerebus guarding the gates of hell! *Snarls*...lol..Bit dramatic..People are gonna be missing my imagination..I enjoy making people laugh and cheerin them up....Can't do that on shoutbox... To finish my statement ur honour I plead that u bring back status updates...If not for us then do it for the monkeys! *Monkeys get on knees and scream at Josh*.... KABOOM! ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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