sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 Hi All, just wanted to ask if anyone has ever been told from family members that their thinking is wrong and not normal when trying to relate beliefs and your own current condition. I was a bit taken aback when talking to my sister who I have not seen for several years kept saying this to me throughout our meet up?? Regards sparks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaTsEyEs Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 Yes, I think I call that bullying and my mum and sister are very good at it. In turn in a very ugly way so am I now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 Hi CatsEyEs, Mmm bullying I never thought about it like that. My problem is I am so sensitive to others statements I tend to intuitively know what they are really saying and I get gut reactions that frustrate me, I think this hit me hard because I normally keep people away from me most of the time as I am less stressed when I do. I have learned from experience that what people cannot understand they will try and deny and push and prod until I lose my temper with them. My next problem is that then when they finally go away I chew over what they have said for hours and wonder if they could be right-) No wonder I am mad Regards Sparks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walker Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 hub always saying 'your talking nonsense - your so difficult to make sense of - thats rubbish - your just inventing things' etc etc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saharah Blue Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 I have been told, we don't understand you and want you to be able to talk with someone who does. Told, has it ever occurred that whole world is not out of step but that you are? Told, see your doing it again, your not taking any responsibility for anything, listen to yourself. Been told can you really truly not see what is going on here? Because we want to know how to help you. Overheard yeah its serious, she really needs to see some one but refuses help. However not once had anyone dare tell me they thought I was a crazy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennywho? Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 ive been told by my brother that he could be depressed but he carries on, like i wouldnt feckin love to do that. coz everyone loves feelin and thinkin the way we do. unless uve experianced that feelin u'll never get it. my family have never got me i dont fit into a neat box enough for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 Hi Walker, First of all in some ways I am glad I am single so I dont have to listen to that, but I was wondering the kind of things that people say for us to get this reaction back and do you think its a lack of understanding or some other reason. For example I have certain beliefs about they way the world is being run, about how human beings are treated, my thoughts regards death and dying, work and morals etc and whilst I dont stand on a street corner banging a drum about them when people do ask for my opinion on XYZ i defo give them. Also when people ask me what I am going through and the physical aspects of that they also do not like what I am saying and brush it off with oh well you will soon be better and normal again once you have gone through the health system????? Keep taking the pills comes to mind I mean when all this began I was certain it would all go away quite quickly etc, now I am not so sure because it seems to be its getting worse as time goes by, however I try not to think of the longer term implications. Regards bb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walker Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 erm bit confused if we have this straight re mh probs = 'well you've always been like that/this' 'you make everything bad' 'your miserable and sour' 'you just make more fuss than other people' 'you get TOO excited' or 'you dont really think/feel/want/know that' is this right unsure sorry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 Walker, what subjects are you and your husband talking about when he makes those comments? Saharah blue, who says these things to you family or friends?? jennywho it sounds like its a family thing your stuck in and they think you can just shake it off and get on with things? I have a small flat where I live alone and dont know if that makes it worse but i love being on my own, i can go weeks without actually seeing anyone apart from basic things like sign on etc, and the odd telephone call (but I screen them all) I think in the long run when I do see a so called friend (got rid of most of those) or a distant family member (my parents are both dead) then the conversation upsets me where comments are made and there seems to be no understanding of my situation, then as said above i mull over evrything that has been said and think its my fault in some way and then it takes time for me to settle slightly again (could be days) I have been like this for a year now and diagnosed with severe deppresion, panic attacks, anxiety, ptsd and 98% agoraphobic but yet to see my psychiatrist (on waiting list) support worker from 30th of this month and i hope she can be of some help as others on this site have indicated they are to them. Regards bb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walker Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 no idea anything anything at all sorry head gone lost bad eve sorry xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honeyflower Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 yes by family members also it drives me crazy sometimes,I am constantly slagged off by them,I don't think they understand,I told them once that I have BPD it was a waste of time,I think they have forgotten.Bullies my family are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 walker apologies you posted before I saw your last post, I am starting to see that it is possibly a problem for most with our conditions then. It seems unfair somehow and if I was around these type of comments a lot I think I would get worse very quickly indeed. When this all started for me i distanced myself natrually as I did not want the company anyway but then it took me ages not to feel quilty over that. Now looking at even a minority of your comments it seems no one is really understood?? Is there anyone out there that does feel understood by family/freinds around them?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 sorry walker hope you feel better soon xx Honeyflower so they slag you off all the time do you have to stay in the same house as them all as well?? I think I am glad i told my sister not to come back ever-) and as i said it she said you dont mean that its just your silly condition which will go away soon lol she had no idea the days i stressed before her arrival and how many times i wished i had said please dont come, by the time she arrived i was shaking like a leaf and clock watching hoping she would go away quickly but oh no i was subject to a conversation of her own understanding on the subject (not informed at all) and how i would get better soon. by the time she left I had to go to bed and today my conditions have defo got worse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaTsEyEs Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 I have alot of views about ....everything. I don't believe in the moon landings, I tell my kids it is crap and that maybe they will be the first people to actually go there, get me some moon stone and make me a ring! That is 1 of the less extreme views I hold. When I am told I am being stupid just because others cannot fathom that the world is run by people, the same as you and me but more unhinged , I feel upset. My views hurt no one, so why did my family hate my freedom of thought? We fear what we don't understand I suppose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaTsEyEs Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 Is there anyone out there that does feel understood by family/freinds around them?? My husband understands, I don't know how or why but he does. he understands that the blinds always have to let in the same amount of light, that a balance is my goal everyday. He has said he doesn't know where I begin and illness starts as it overlaps and maybe it isn't illness, maybe I am just me. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honeyflower Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 sorry walker hope you feel better soon xx Honeyflower so they slag you off all the time do you have to stay in the same house as them all as well?? I think I am glad i told my sister not to come back ever-) and as i said it she said you dont mean that its just your silly condition which will go away soon lol she had no idea the days i stressed before her arrival and how many times i wished i had said please dont come, by the time she arrived i was shaking like a leaf and clock watching hoping she would go away quickly but oh no i was subject to a conversation of her own understanding on the subject (not informed at all) and how i would get better soon. by the time she left I had to go to bed and today my conditions have defo got worse. No I don't live in the same house as them,I just know they slag me off LOL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 CaTsEyEs, I know we are on the same page now lol, all around me i see deception in the world where others cant and when I point it out and can sometimes can even back it up with research/personal experience they look at me as if well as if i am bonkers. There are others who agree with me but they are very few and far between. I love the way you say your husband does not know where you begin and where your illness starts and that it could just be you -) well that to me means 90% of the world are sick apart from us other 10% lol and what a great hubby you have. As for the moon I am sorta where you are on that one too, well I suppose the few have to point out the obvious to the many haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 honeyflower, Thank goodnes you are not in that house lol, hurts when its family though, mind it hurts whoever it is ..........................xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaTsEyEs Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 :lol: When my son goes to the moon, he even has some space pyjamas now to prove that he will be the 1st man on the moon, I'll ask him to get you a moon stone too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 haha that would be great we could rejoice together in our knowing -) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saharah Blue Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 Family mostly. Some bf's, lovers, and one time my employer. It is often in relation to the kind of opinions and perceptions I have. Like you I don't get on my soapbox, but I do hold many fringe opinions. On the whole I am great about never bringing up these things and being the good listener to everyone else, since I know it is easiest if I self censor. I have trained myself to say appropriate things, and look for the good in a negative etc....because Pollyanna as it might be, it is a socially acceptable sah for others to experience. However, I do not bother with this for my family, which is why others would say, oh no she is a lovely girl. And my family would say, ah no you don't want to get involved with her, she can be relentless and is a total wildcard. Which is another thing my sis told my current bf when he expressed an interest in me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 OMG Saharah Blue, I think along with CatsEyEs the three of are sounding more and more similar. I was laughing my head of at your explanation of how you are with others as I do that but yeah people who know me more know how reckless I can behave as they are allways stating things like remember when she did this and that and i thought at the time it was quite normal, but I would take exception at my family medling with my boyfriends lol It seems we all have these certain traits of thought etc I really wonder where all this comes from? does the psychiatrist know as I have yet to see him/her? I think maybe I was allways a bit like this until it went right over the top last year and i started suffering with other things as well which meant I could not cope anymore at all and had to seek help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaTsEyEs Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 My psychiatrist knows, he says I am thinker! Which is good because I don't do much! :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparks Posted August 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 hahaha does he mean over think because i can do that to the point of forgetting everything else for hours/days/weeks lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saharah Blue Posted August 23, 2011 Report Share Posted August 23, 2011 I will blame my opinions on the inability to self sooth, feeling empty way too much, and an unhealthy preoccupations with death for most of my young life. *i'll expand no further, would like a refill on your drink, lol see that is how you do it, change the subject when it start to get weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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