Confused?

[addy2]

I have metionned it before on here about my treatment team not knowing what to do to help me, well for months they have been trying to get in touch with BPD specialist, so the meeting was today was ment to be last week but there was a mix up in the dates and it was today, well guess what now i have to meet her as well along with my therapist, social worker and old psychotherapist, i am so scared and confused, what is wrong wiith me? My social worker said my therapist was holding back the diagnosis of BPD but my therapist is convinced its what i have along with other traits but he won't tell me what. My partner says i am not as easy to work with as i thought i was but i don't see it i don't understand what the problem is why don't they know how to help me? Just wondered has this every happened to anyone else, my anxiety is so high now how can i talk to a room full of people i struggle on a 1 to 1.