AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 i can relate to that toaster, im not sure why it is, but its almost like its a competition to be the 'worst' in a way i want people to see so i can be like yeh this is how bad i feel im fucking nuts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine001 Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 my children love going swimming, not easy to explain, they are the only ones who have seen them and so far I have explained them as gardening wounds etc. At work and home always long sleeves however hot it is. the times people say you look hot why are you wearing your cardi. are they bad? no I dont think so compared to others I have seen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 i do wonder how i will explain them to my kids if i ever have any. i guess i havent really seen anyone else with them so have nothing to compare against, maybe im just worrying for nothing and theyr not really that bad, thats what i hope anyway Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundries Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I kind of like it when I do see people out with them. It makes me feel understood even if I just randomely pass them in the street. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 i agree with you sundries, i saw a guy in the street, seemed like a normal guy but had bad scars on his arms which were obvious sh scars, an it made me feel better, less alone. i felt real empathy for him, was a very strong emotion. gives me hope that some day i will be able to do it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ubix Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I don't like people seeing them, Makes me feel ashamed. I had comments which i felt, so I keep them covered. If I was brave enough to go I'd get tattoo's to cover them :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toaster Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I get jealous if I see people with 'worse' scars than me :blink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundries Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I've hear other people say that toaster. Makes me feel sad and want to protect you :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine001 Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 i feel mine arent bad enough so they show I am not hurting as much as other people. I think if professionals saw them they would think I cant even do that right. my friend once said well i have seen worse than that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bena.baby Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 Totally, Christine, mine are really not that bad and I feel like people think it means I'm not really that ill. Which should be a good thing. But it's not. :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 yeh i can relate, nurse at hospital said about mens scars being more serious, then back-tracked saying 'not saying yours aren't serious, just i've seen worse'. must admit it made me want to punch her a little bit :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toaster Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 yeh, its like the bigger the scar, the bigger the hurt... as for 'professionals' invalidating us...well pft what do they know? i know its shit though... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dibley Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I'm worried about showing the ones on my legs, because they are quite dark and big. I have to show them in 3 week, I'll be wearing a bikini and I'm very paranoid about them, also, I've been trying so hard not to cut and make fresh marks until we get back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 have you thought about trying some make-up on them head hurts? can understand why you would be worried about it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dibley Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I'll be in water so won't really make a difference, I'll just have to move around a lot so people can't properly focus! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 you can get water proof ones. im sure itl be ok hun guess people will be too worried about what they look like to notice hopefully Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyheartemma Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I havent got any. sometimes i think i should get some. maybe then people would believe me when i say how bad i feel. but the marks i make always fade. and i'm scared of making marks anyway because my mum would be cross. but she probably wouldnt be cross, its more likely she would ignore them totally. she always changes the subject when i tell her i've self harmed and when i tell the doctor she says i havent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 bless you emma hun sorry your mum does that. not really something to want tho in all honesty, has ruined my life in most ways. will affect me when i look for a job in terms of uniform, cant wear the clothes i want to, feel ashamed to let people see them, family give me disgusted looks. has caused all sorts of problems with people too. can understand wanting to show how bad you feel tho xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine001 Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 please dont emma it doesnt help really and its hard to stop, and we know your pain and hurt so you are at least listened too here. xxxxxxxxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greenthing Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 yes, please don't do this unless you really, really have to. It is, in my experience, addictive and very, very difficult to stop. I am peppered with little scars, but most of them are in places you can't see, or look like 'natural' scars because I was forced to hide my sh for 30+ years. I've always worked on the revolting principle that small and deep hurts as much as large and shallow and shows a heck of a lot less. I also bruise myself, bite myself or whatever so the marks fade in a week or two which makes them easier to hide. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElleT Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 Self harm doesn't help, in the long run. My scars a big, I had two minor self harm incidents, one when I was 16, it was a tiny little cut and it did make me feel better. Then a slightly larger one two years ago around Christmas. Then last June was the big one. The scars from the first two aren't that noticeable. But the ones from last june are big, and I'm ashamed of them. Upper and lower arms, had to get 8 stitches, would have been many more stitches but I didn't go to the hospital in the 'proper amount of time'. Ever since I've been ashamed of them, there are times when I can forget them or not associate the problems with them. But I notice when people look, they want to ask. A few times I've snapped and when people stare I tell them I tried to kill myself. Which is total bull because they aren't anywhere near any vital veins. I'm trained to take peoples blood so one thing I do know is where the good veins are. The cutting didn't help, at least emotionally, it DID help me make the decision to really work on getting help. Emma, I want to tell you that hurting yourself won't help, but I can't do that. I am saying don't do it, in the long run it isn't worth it. But I also know that in the here and now it can be a big help, but please please don't do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starryeyesee Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I have scars on my left arm which I have been asked about. The people who asked had already guessed what they were so I couldn't lie. I wear a bolero cardigan when I do concerts in the summer as people are looking at me so I feel really self conscious. This summer I'm going to to do a teaching English as a Foreign Language course where I will be observed. I will have to cover my arms as my scars will still be quite obvious and it will be in June so will look weird that I'm wearing sleeves in summer. This is the main reason I'm dreading the course. Hope everyone is ok xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyheartemma Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 Starry could you wear a very thin cotton long sleeved top? I think it would be fine to wear that on a course, they will probably just think you are wearing it to be a little bit smart, from what i remember the teachers at my school didnt weat tshirts with short sleeves, it was long sleeved tops or short sleeve shirts in the summer just fed up with medical people taking my mums word over mine about if i self harm or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElleT Posted April 12, 2012 Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 I'm sorry about what you've been dealing with Emma, it sounds really unprofessional that they are taking your moms word over yours when it comes to your actions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted April 12, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 12, 2012 sounds stressful starry hun, maybe a thin cardi or a summery outfit with sleeves? probably will be hard to find tho Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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