A Few Hundred Words Of Regulated Nonsense...

[cj_89]

There's no real purpose to this post I just felt like I needed to jot some stuff down and this seemed like an appropriate place - almost like a "dear diary" I mean, you're welcome to read it but honestly it'll be full of rubbish.

So, nearing the end of May, Birthday's passed, Uni's nearly over for the year. Going to be going home for the summer, first time in two years, it'll be an experience, hopefully a welcome break Keep trying to analyse the year, what I've learnt, have I got better, worse?

In comparison to first year of uni it's certainly been less dramatic. Social groups have changed still not sure whether this is in a good way. Confidence, wow this is a tough one I think I've lost confidence or it may just be that I've gotten older. I'm certainly more comfortable in my own skin but arounf myself. Meeting new people it's like I've lost my energy. Perhaps come september I 'll push myself out there a little more - done it plenty of times before New flat, new housemates, I'll be on campus and I'll be going into class more. We'll see what happens. The events will still run, tone it down and build it up for 2014. Tom - jeeez he's been such a big vocal point of everything since I moved up here. The more I think about it the more I see that he's just another ex - I was this upset with James, Jarron etc etc. Perhaps with Tom it's slightly harder because I've had to change so much of my life to get away from him. Not only did I lose my partner I lost a lot of my social group though I guess he did too. I think about him a lot still but that's normal. It will be nice to go home and KNOW that I'm not gonna' bump into him in town, around uni etc.

Cbt i found quite good thinking things through properly, meditation has been brilliant, Money I've been up and down with. Deffinitely prefer being more responsible and making sure I have cash avalible. Slipped a bit these last few weeks but'll sort it for next year. Rships - funny one said I'd stay single all year, few hiccups - nothing major. Sometimes think I'm ready, other times I like being single, sometimes I miss the affection. Best to sort myself out first though, lotta work left to do.

Definitely making progress in one sense of another - getting there. Hoping a summer at home will rejuvenate me Get my energy back, return to uni full of life, excited to meet people, to learn to be here. Soon find out :)